I Married
An Alien…….
Isabel answered the door when the doorbell rang. It was
Michael and Max. Michael was carrying a ladder and a can of paint, and Max was
carrying painting stuff too.
“Honey, the painters are here.” Isabel called to Jesse
in her syrupy voice.
“Yeah, that's funny.” Michael pushed his way inside.
“Come on, move out of the way. This crap is heavy.”
Jesse walked into the room seeing his two brother-in-laws.
“Hey guys.”
“Hey.” Max said nodding to Jesse.
“You sure you don't want me to stay and help out?”
Jesse asked the boys.
“Ah, actually, there are a couple cans outside.”
Michael informed the man happy to hand over the job.
“But they can manage.” Isabel told her husband pushing
him towards the door.
“Right, our treat,” Max said. “Seriously, it's a
housewarming gift from us to you.”
“Yeah,” Michael agreed, quickly adding, “and a
wedding gift that's combined.”
Isabel laughs with that special look in her eyes, as she
glared at Michael. “Don't be silly. The wedding gift will be separate.”
Michael made a face. “Of course it will.” Michael
rolled his eyes. Last present he actually had to get Isabel, she made him
exchange it three times until it finally met her approval.
“Well, it's just very generous of you to take your
Saturday off to paint our apartment.” Jesse told them surprised at how much
more accepting the two boys appeared about his marriage to Isabel.
“Ah, it won't take us that long, we're pretty fast.”
Max told him.
Isabel grabbed Jesse's arm and walks him to the door.
“Come on honey, you're going to be late. My dad hates late.”
“Okay, alright. Uh,” Jesse grabbed his golf clubs,
“see you guys later.” He kissed Isabel's cheek nodding to the boys again.
“Thanks.”
“No problem.” Max said as Michael waved while making a
face. Isabel shut the door behind Jesse.
“You know you could’ve probably done this yourself.”
Michael told Isabel irritated by having to do this on his Saturday.
“Right, Jesse was going to let his wife paint the entire
apartment all by herself.”
Max looked at the walls. “You know what color you
want?”
“Tuscan Ocher or
Michael rolled his eyes. “Here we go.” Isabel had them
spend an entire afternoon moving her damn furniture recently. This was going to
take forever.
“I need to see it in this space, so uh, Max you take
Ocher to that wall, “Isabel pointed to the side wall and handed Max the color
sample, “and Michael you take Red to that one there.” Michael frowned
grabbing the sample color paper from her. “Then I'll decide. Maybe.”
Max and Michael held their hands against the wall, looking
at the sample color, and concentrating. The white walls slowly turned into the
two colors.
Michael stood back looking at the wall, not seeing the
difference between his color and Max’s. “I'm exhausted, I'm calling a
break.” He threw himself on the sofa and turned on the TV.
Isabel and Max leaned against the back of the sofa staring
at the walls.
“I like the Ocher.” Max said after some consideration.
“Hmmm,” Isabel wasn’t that easily convinced.
Michael surfed the channels for a moment until he found a
reason to go on. “Oh, Nickelodeon is having a marathon of Bewitched! My
weekend is set.”
Isabel turned to stare at Michael in disgust. “Who are
you and what have you done with Michael?”
Max snickered. “It's the whole Maria thing. Ever since
she’s been out of town, he's been getting into the tube.” Max addressed his
next comments to Michael. “It's getting pathetic!”
Michael ignored them. “This is the one where Samantha
turns Darren into a goose. It's good.”
“You need a hobby, man.”
Michael made a huffing noise. He had a hobby, but she was
out of town dealing with a death in her mother’s family. “What? Like golf?
Ride around in some stupid cart?”
They all froze at the sound of keys rattling. Isabel
freaked out. “Oh, Jesse!! Oh!!! The walls!!” She ran to the door and slammed
it shut as soon as Jesse tried to open it.
“Hey, Isabel, it's me!” Jesse called.
“Sorry honey, there's a ladder in front of the door. Hold
on one second.” Isabel gestured wildly at them to do it. Fix the walls. Max
and Michael quickly changed the walls back to white.
“No, that's wrong. It was more of a Navaho White, that's
more Aecho.” Max told Michael as they changed the walls back, and Michael’s
was different.
Michael made a face. “And I'm the one who needs a hobby?
Stop being so gay … you’re freaking me.”
“Is everything okay in there?” Jesse called through the
door.
Isabel looked at Michael and Max making sure it was done.
“Yeah, it's fine. It's fine.” She unlocked the door and lets Jesse in.
“Yeah, sorry. Sorry, Forget something?”
“Yeah, my balls.” Michael and Max both laughed, finding
that funny. A man married to Isabel losing his balls? Funny stuff. “Where you
guys just talking about me?” Jesse asked Michael and Max.
Isabel made a scoffing noise in her throat. “That's a
little paranoid, don't you think? I mean, the whole world doesn't revolve around
you.”
“It revolves around Michael.” Max volunteered.
Michael raised his hand. “Uh, that's a fact.” He walked
to the sofa and went back to watching Bewitched.
Jesse frowned at the other boy that was confusingly sort of
Isabel’s surrogate brother. “Is he okay?”
“Michael?” Isabel asked. “Not really, but then he
never has been. He’s just suffering Maria withdrawal.”
“Oh, okay. Bye.”
“Bye.” Isabel shut the door after him locking it. She
walked over to the sofa exhausted suddenly by the constant lies.
“That was fun.” Michael said his eyes never leaving the
TV.
Isabel sighed watching Samantha on Bewitched for a moment.
“She had it so easy.”
“What are you talking about?” Michael demanded. “Take
a look beyond the surface, and you'll see the truth. Samantha takes pride in her
witchcraft, and she made a sacrifice for it in an uncaring, secular world. She's
a modern day Athena.”
Max stared at the deranged Michael. “I swear my head is
going to explode.”
“Well, at least Darren knew she was a witch. She's not
having to run around hiding her powers from her own husband. But think about how
much easier my life would be if Jesse could just know who I really am.”
“Yeah, that would be a classic show.” Michael said
sarcastically. “You could call it ‘I Married an Alien.’”
Isabel laughed, and watched Samantha chasing Darren, who
was now a goose, around the house. She started to daydream.
It was no longer Samantha and
Darren, but her and Jesse riding in an old car on TV in '60s clothes. Jesse
found the orb in the car.
“Isabel, how many times do I
have to tell you not to leave your alien orbs in the car?”
“Sorry dear.” ‘60s Isabel
smiled perkily and put the orb in her purse.
“Yeah, that would be some show.” Isabel said to
herself.
~~~
Isabel was making breakfast and her mind kept wandering.
Isabel walked into her kitchen
dressed like Samantha. The kitchen was a mess with dirty dishes everywhere.
“Wow, this is certainly no way
to start a morning.” Isabel said simpering to herself as she waved her hands,
and the dishes were clean and put away where they belong. “Hmm... I think
we'll have French toast and sausage.” She waved her hand and the bread flew
over to her as she grabbed it. Then she waved her hand again and the
refrigerator door opened as a carton of eggs flew out and she grabbed them. She
waved her hand again, and the sausage flew across the room.
Jesse walked in dressed as
Darren, wearing a suit and holding a brief case. He saw Isabel using her powers
to make the spatula fly over to her.
“Isabel.” Jesse said
disapprovingly. “How many times do I have to tell you no alien powers in the
house?” He stopped and sniffed the air. “Is that French toast?”
Isabel smiled sweetly opening
the lid to the pan. “Mm-hmmm.”
Jesse kissed her cheek. “Well,
maybe just this once.”
Jesse came into the kitchen sitting down at the table
startling Isabel from her daydream. “Good morning.”
“Morning honey. Hey, here's this.” She handed him his
coffee. “This time,” she told him as she lifted the lid to the pan with his
breakfast, “I think I have really,” smoke poured out of the pan and Isabel
stared down into it, “burned it again.” She put his burnt breakfast on his
plate. “I think there’s something wrong with the stove.”
Jesse drank his orange juice. “Mm, well the orange juice
is perfect.”
“Good. Fresh-squeezed.” Isabel smiled at him. “Okay,
it's
Jesse quickly got up before Isabel decided to cook anything
else. “Oh, I gotta go. I have to be in court at
“I know, it's okay, I have to study.”
“I'll see you later!”
“Okay!” Isabel waves cheerfully. Until the door shuts,
then she sat at the table dejectedly. Her life could be easier if she didn’t
have to live a lie every day.
~~~
Isabel startled from another daydream where in the sitcom
version of her life, Kyle was a friend who wanted her to use her powers for get
rich quick schemes. She stared at the lump of metal on her table.
“Why do you always come to me with these things?”
Isabel asked him.
“I'm sorry but I couldn't figure it out, and Toby's been
on my ass all week. All it has to do is work, and it doesn't even have to work
well.” Kyle explained. “Just so it works.”
“All right.” Isabel placed her hand over the
carburetor, and used her powers to fix it.
“Thank you.”
There was a knock at the back door and Isabel was more than
happy to leave Kyle and his mechanical nightmare to go answer it. She smiled
when she saw Maria standing there. “Maria! Thank god, you’re home.”
Isabel hugged the other girl enthusiastically, as Maria
patted her on the back, uncertain about the reception she was receiving. “Um,
hi?” She glanced over at Kyle who shrugged. “So, I’m touched that you
missed me.”
“Missed you?” Isabel laughed. “God, you can believe
how relieved I am to see you. Michael has been a bundle of irritating nerves
since he came back from the funeral without you.”
“Yeah, I had to stay behind to help mom with grandma’s
estate. Sean was pretty useless. He lived with Grams for a while, and her death
hit him pretty hard.”
“Sorry about your grandmother, Maria.” Kyle offered his
condolences.
“Thanks. She was old, and really after grandfather DeLuca
died, I really didn’t expect her to go on so many years alone. They were all
gifts.” Maria cleared her throat really not wanting to talk about her loss.
“Um, does anyone know where Michael is?”
“He’s not home glued to the TV?” Isabel asked.
“Nope. I checked there first, school’s out for the day,
he’s not working at the Crashdown, and it’s too early to be at Meta-Chem.”
“I really should be going,” Kyle said picking up the
carburetor.
Maria easily stood in his way. “Kyle? You wouldn’t know
where Michael has wandered to, would you?”
“Maria, c’mon, give me a break.”
“Which arm?”
Kyle laughed, but the seriousness of Maria’s eyes stopped
him from laughing, actually made him gulp. “Look, I don’t want to say
anything, because he asked me not to. I can tell you that it’s a surprise for
your birthday, and I’m not saying anything more.” Kyle quickly escaped.
Maria took a seat. “My birthday? That’s not for another
six weeks.” Maria clicked at nail on her teeth in thought. “What could take
six weeks to prepare for?”
“Don’t complain, just sit back and enjoy. I mean a few
years ago, he would’ve given you a cutout coupon to a local eatery, and wonder
why you didn’t think a can of motor oil for the Jetta wasn’t a great
thoughtful present.”
Maria laughed. “True. He’s come a long way.”
“How’s the dating thing?” Isabel looked at Maria
critically. “You do realize that the two of you are now officially dating,
right?”
“Yeah, I can be a tad bit dense at times,” Maria
ignored Isabel’s sarcastic ‘You think?’ going on, “but things have …
changed.”
“Changed?” Isabel wasn’t sure she got that.
“He’s pulled back a bit in our relationship, not just
the dating thing, but the friendship thing too.” Maria sat back unhappy. She
was afraid this would happen.
“Maria, he’s not pulling back. The boy is a grumpy lump
on the sofa porking on ‘Nick at Nite.’ Believe me, he’s missing you.”
Maria shook her head. “It’s my mom. She did this.”
“Excuse me?”
“He came to the funeral, they talked, and then next thing
I knew, he told me that he needed to get home to work. I told him I’d come
back with him, but he told me to stay, that my mother needed me.”
“You think she said something to him?”
Maria shrugged, not in the least bit elegantly as she put
her head down on the table. “I’m sure of it. I have literally not kissed
him, even platonically since Enigma. I can tell you exactly how many hours
I’ve slept in his bed. I’m having a hard time getting him to hold my hand or
spend real time with me, even like we used to do.” Maria groaned. “I messed
this up, and I’m not sure how I did it.”
Isabel frowned. Something wasn’t right. “Look, Maria,
he’s planning a big surprise for your birthday … I don’t think that means
the end of anything. I mean, the two of you have been a couple for years, even
if you refused to admit it.”
“What are you talking about?”
Isabel breathed deeply. There was only so much she could
say before she said too much. Some stuff, Michael needed to tell Maria. “Why
do you think Alex hit Michael when he kissed Courtney? Or why do you think I
felt so weird over the whole destiny dream with me having a baby with Michael? I
was pretty confused, but I wasn’t confused about the fact that Michael was
yours, and that strange circumstance would interrupt your relationship, no more
than I had any illusions that I would ever be enough, or able to compensate him
for your loss. Michael would have given me his support, but be with me? Never.
That was never going to happen, even if there was a baby.”
Maria stared at Isabel, speechless. So she admitted to be
sleeping, barely breathing, waiting to exhale, but she couldn’t have missed
all this, even that long ago … for that long?
“Look,” Isabel said afraid she said too much.
“Don’t obsess. Just let Michael come to you in his own way. Or … try
kissing him.”
Maria felt a sinking in her stomach. “I can’t kiss
him,” she said in a hollow voice. God she had plans, but him pulling away
changed them. She had to respect his wishes, respect that he didn’t want that
with her.
“Why?”
Maria rubbed her forehead for a moment. “Zero to sixty in
less than a minute.”
“Excuse me?” Isabel was confused.
Maria cleared her throat. “The next time I put my mouth
on Michael Guerin’s, there are going to be clothes flying, and definite
behavior not suitable for minors. I can’t. If he isn’t onboard with me from
the start, then I might do something unforgivable.”
Isabel stared at the table, wanting to ask something that
bothered her, or at least made her curious for the past few months. “Maria …
how did you know about alien sex? I mean I assumed that you and Michael were …
you know. I mean the entire school does. How did you know?”
“Oh, god!” Maria put her hands over her cheeks,
embarrassed. “I … that’s something I wasn’t going to tell anyone.”
“Maria …”
“Do you ever have dreams?” Maria asked.
Isabel laughed. “Incidentally, lately … lots of them. I
keep daydreaming Jesse and me into the Bewitched scenario, you know, where he
knows that I’m an alien.”
“Okay, yeah, I do mean daydreams, but also other types
of dreams …” Maria cleared her throat. “You know … dreams.”
“You mean sexual fantasies, and wet dreams?”
“Exactly!”
“Michael’s a star in yours?”
“No, Michael is more than just a star … he heightens
them.” Maria said trying to discretely explain something she couldn’t really
explain, but something she had been experiencing a long time, literally since
she started getting flashes from Michael … feel his emotions.
“Heightens them?” Isabel shook her head, uncertain she
was catching Maria’s meaning. Maria told her that alien sex was intense
… very intense in a very good way. “Oh! You mean that he gives you …
oh!”
“Mm-hmm. He does.” Maria exhaled deeply just at the
thought of it.
“Does he get the same … benefit?”
“You think I’m going to ask him that?!” Maria was mortified. “I mean, until recently he was just
a ‘good friend.’ I couldn’t go up to him and say … ‘Oh, by the way,
you know how I get flashes off you at times? Well, guess what, it could with
other perks as well. Spaceboy, when you flash, you really flash!’”
“Okay, so I see your point.”
Maria bit her lip. “The thing is, Isabel … I’ve been
dying to ask someone, and I would ask Liz, but just never knew how to do it.”
“What?”
“You heal people, right?”
“Sometimes. Max does most of it, but yeah, I can heal.”
“Okay.” Maria nodded. “Is it … normal for the recipient and maybe even the healer to experience a
…” Maria struggled for a word not too graphic or crude, “...completion?”
“Orgasm? You got an orgasm from being healed?”
Isabel’s mouth opened in shock. “When?”
“Michael healed my broken arm in
“And you …”
“Oh, yeah!”
Isabel started to make another comment, but there was a
knock on her door. She stood up pointing at Maria. “Do not move. Do not leave.
We’re still talking.” She answered the door. “Yes?”
“Hi, are--are you Isabel?” A strange man stood in the
doorway.
“Yes.”
“Uh, I'm Eric, Eric Hughes, Jesse's friend from …”
“From Cornell. Of course, come in. I'm sorry.”
“Thank you.” The man smiled, relieved he got the right
address.
“Come in.” Isabel stood back and as Eric came in
putting his suitcase down. “So what are you doing here?”
“Uh, well, I just had a gig in
“That’s my friend, Maria.” Isabel quickly introduced
them, before going back to Eric. “That's so great. Jesse is going to be so
excited to see you. He was so disappointed to hear that you couldn't make it to
the wedding.”
“I know. I'm sorry about that,” Eric confessed, not
willing to admit that weddings were not his scene.
“Don't worry about that.”
“No, no, no. I had the best intentions. I was on the road
and I was going to drive straight through from
Gig? Isabel frowned. “Oh, are you a musician?”
Eric laughed. “Uh, no, I'm a reporter.”
“A reporter?”
Maria’s mouth opened, and she quickly got to her feet.
“Mm, I should be leaving. Bye Isabel!” She practically ran out the back
door.
“Maria!” Isabel laughed nervously turning to Eric.
“She must have plans … somewhere else.”
Pity, Eric shrugged turning his attentions back to Isabel.
“Must say, I was pretty surprised to hear that ol' Jesse was getting hitched.
You must be something out of the ordinary.”
“Me? No.” Isabel laughed uncomfortably. “So, how long
will you be staying in
“Not too long. I just wanted to stop by, see Jess and
meet you. Nothing too much going on right now, and I might not get the time
later.”
“You have to stay. We have a couch, completely free.”
Isabel insisted, needing to be normal in some way. “Jesse will be so excited
to see you. He's always talking about you and the guys from the fraternity.”
“It's all good I hope.”
“Well, he glosses over the good stuff. Makes it seem like
you spent all your free time discussing and studying under his influence.”
Eric laughed, his dimples deepening in amusement. “He
must be a lawyer.” He sat on the couch smiling at the young woman. “Um,
well, I appreciate you letting me stay on the couch. I'll try not to get in the
way. Who knows, maybe while I'm here I can get myself a story. This is
~~~
Isabel went to find her brother, and knowing him, she
headed straight to the Crashdown. He would no doubt be there mooning over Liz,
waiting for her to get off work so his life could begin.
“Liz, hi.”
“Isabel. You want a menu?”
“No. I want Max.”
“He’s not here.”
Isabel looked around. “You’re kidding! Huh, imagine
that.” She frowned, trying to think where else Max could be.
“But he will be soon. He called a few moments ago to tell
me he was on his way.”
“I’ll wait.” Isabel looked around, not really hungry
or wanting anything. She glanced at Liz, and then remembering her talk with
Maria speculation, entered her eyes. “Um, Liz?”
“Hmm?”
“Can I ask you a question?”
Liz stopped working to wait for Isabel to continue. Isabel
rarely sought her out, so this was unusual. “Sure.”
“Do you have … dreams?” Isabel rolled her eyes. Of
course she had dreams, after all she had invaded a few. “About Max, I mean.
You know … dreams?” God, Isabel didn’t mean her boring romantic
dreams about Max making it rain rose petals, or anything that lame.
Liz mouth flew open. “You mean like …” Her face
turned slightly red. “Oh, those kinds of dreams! Sure, I mean …”
Isabel quickly held up a hand. “No details!” She took a
deep breath. Eww. That was close. “No, I just wanted to know that when you do,
if you actually feel anything, you know …”
“It’s just a dream, Isabel.”
“No. I mean do you get a ‘physical’ response to the
dream?”
“You mean like an orgasm?” Liz asked in a loud whisper,
leaning in closer, suddenly turning even redder as Max entered the Café. “Oh!
No. I mean, it’s … no, never! I mean that one time when we found the orb
from a touch, but otherwise … normally, um, no!”
“Oh, okay. I don’t either.” Isabel said quickly as
Max joined them.
“You don’t what?” he asked.
“Nothing.” Liz said quickly smiling at her boyfriend
but then frowned, connecting the dots to the questions. “Wait, if you don’t
and I don’t, then why are you asking?”
Isabel cleared her throat. She glanced quickly at her
brother. “Nothing. It’s just something that happens to Maria, and I … she
wanted to know if it was commonplace.”
“Michael gives her orgasms?” Liz squeaked. How could
her friend not mention this?
“What?” Max sat up straighter.
“Shush!” Isabel looked around nervously. “Could you
say it a little louder?”
“Does Michael?” Max asked curiously.
“Do I look like I’m going to ask?” Isabel asked her
brother crossly. “I’m getting the impression … yes. She said that when he
healed her broken arm, that she … that they both, well … you know!” Isabel
looked around leaning on the counter. “I was just wondering if when Max healed
you, if you felt … you know, that amount of intensity?”
“No. I didn’t really feel anything, not until he let me
see into his mind, you know so I wouldn’t be afraid of him.”
“I got flashes from Liz, about her life, but not that.”
Max reassured Liz quickly not wanting her to think he was some alien pervert
running around healing everyone, especially kids for a sexual rush.
“I don’t get that rush either when I dream about Jesse
or anything either.”
“Wait,” Max said needing clarification. “It happens
in dreams?” Damn. Max obviously missed the first part of the conversation.
Isabel hit the countertop. “Oh my god! Of course!”
“What?” Max and Liz chorused.
“If they’re heightening off each other, getting this
rush in their ordinary dreams and daydreams,
no wonder neither of them felt a need to date other people!” Max and
Liz shared a glance, still confused by what Isabel was saying. “Don’t you
get it? They’re like each other’s private vibrators.”
Liz stood back, not sure she wanted to think that much
about Michael and Maria’s private relationship. “You know, a few years back,
after they went to
“She said that?” Isabel laughed. “Michael said the
exact same thing!”
“I said what?” Michael asked, having come up behind
them with them unaware.
“Nothing!” they all said in unison, looking guilty.
Isabel changed the subject. “Oh good, you’re both here.
I think we might have a problem.” She quickly told them about Jesse’s
friend, and his joking request to find
“Sounds like you’re making a big thing out of
nothing.” Michael said. He looked at the time. He was missing the marathon.
“I’ve gotta go.”
“Did Maria find you?”
“Maria?” Michael stopped short. “She’s back?”
“Uh-huh. Came by my place looking for you. We had an
interesting talk.” Isabel ignored Max’s comment under his breath about ‘Oh
boy, did they...,’ as she continued. “Seems Maria’s upset, confused by
you. She’s under the impression that you’re pulling back on your friendship
with her, and that she messed things up.”
“Great!” Michael scratched his brow. “Look, I’ve
gotta go.” He was out of there. Great. Just great. The more he tried, the
worse things got. You would think he could catch a break.
~~~
Jesse and his friend were looking through his CDs and
drinking beer while talking about mutual friends. Isabel came in and dropped off
bedding for Eric, refusing to stay up and hang with the two friends.
“Just like the good ol' days, man. Where's the bong?”
Eric asked Jesse.
“Shh!” Jesse glanced at the closed bedroom door.
“Come on, she doesn't know I used to get high.”
“What? What, you're keeping secrets from your wife?”
“I dunno. We're still getting to know each other.”
“Okay dude, you're supposed to do that before
you get married,” Eric pointed out.
Jesse laughed a little drinking his beer. “In a perfect
world.”
“Yeah. Well, how many secrets are you keeping from
her?”
“Hmm. Not as many as she has.”
“What?”
“Nothing.” Jesse frowned in his beer.
“Come on dude, look who’re you talking to? Must I
remind you of the notorious infamous Kate Joplin episode and her monstrous
lacrosse playing 6’3” boyfriend?”
Jesse laughed. “Yeah, you saved my ass, I remember.”
“Yeah, I did!”
“I--I don't know man-- it's just weird. I feel like
there's a part of Isabel's life she doesn't want to share with me, you know?”
“Like what?”
“Like--I don't know just--Every once in a while something
weird happens and … like the other day, I'm fixing the ice maker. Okay I'm in
there, and I'm getting pissed off, I'm banging the thing, and I'm cursing like
that's gonna help, and she comes in and she says, take a break. So I'm headed to
the bedroom, and I glance back and her hand is on the ice maker.”
“So?”
“So when I come back, it's fixed. I mean it works
perfectly.”
“Huh. Well, you know, in my professional opinion, I'm
gonna have to say that that is not a story.”
“Okay, fine. Well, what about her brother, Max? He breaks
my nose right before our wedding …”
“He broke your nose?”
“Yeah, it's a long story, I'll tell you later. But he
breaks my nose, and he heals it with a steak the next day.”
“What do you mean a steak like …”
“Like a steak. He completely heals a very broken nose in
about thirty seconds. It's just weird. Just … really weird.”
“Huh. Well, maybe … maybe she's an alien. Jesse man,
you married one of the
“Shut up, shut up.” Jesse begged as Eric began to sing
the theme song to I Dreamed of Jeannie.
~~~
Max walked into Michael’s living room and found him
brooding, watching ‘Bewitched.’
“Okay, this is officially not funny anymore.”
“I'd ask what your problem is Maxwell, but I really don't
care.” Michael said ignoring Max to concentrate on the marathon.
Max used his powers to turn off the TV. “Michael, you
have got to get a life.”
“I tried. It didn’t work. Thanks for the heartfelt
advice. You can leave now.” Michael used his powers to turn on the TV.
“Go talk to her!”
Michael couldn’t do that. “I can’t, okay?” He
groaned. Why couldn’t Max just leave him alone to wallow in TV Land marathons?
“What happened? You two looked like you were on your way,
and now … what changed your mind
or stalled?”
“Neither. Her grandmother died.”
“And?”
“I saw Amy DeLuca.” Michael confessed.
Max sat on the edge of the sofa. “She told you to back
off?”
“No. Maria’s mom and me, we have an
‘understanding’, but I was talking to her, listening to her, and it occurred
to me. I want her daughter.”
“Big revelation?”
“No. You don’t get it. I want her not even legal
daughter, and not just as my friend. I’m talking about in a completely carnal
way, and some of the things I think about in my brain, if Mrs. DeLuca could read
my mind …”
“She would kill you in your sleep as the antichrist?”
“That and worse. She would hang me upside down,
eviscerate me, while I slowly sanguinated, and then infect me with a flesh
eating virus.”
“Oh wow.” Max was quiet for a moment. Those had to be
some very interesting fantasies. “So what now? You gonna just step away from
Maria?”
“No. I’m going to wait until she’s eighteen, which is
in 40 days, 11 hours, 37 minutes, and some seconds. Then, she’s legal and I
won’t be dishonoring a woman that has been almost the only mother I’ve ever
had.”
Max laughed shaking his head. He never imagined that it
would ever come to this for Michael. “So this is a respect thing.”
“Yeah. I don’t have much in the way of honor, and no
family to mention, but Amy DeLuca. She opened her home to me, gave me her trust,
and she seems to understand that this thing I have for Maria isn’t just a
raging hormone thing. She trusts me with her daughter, and I was standing there
talking to her thinking about how tight Maria looked in that cute little black
dress.”
“It’s a good dress.”
“Yeah.” Michael groaned. “I am officially one real
sick pup, making all nice with her mother while my mind was going over all kinds
of nice lewd scenarios.”
“So you left.”
“Seemed the best thing to do, given my physical state. I
swear I take more cold showers than any other man alive.”
“You do take a lot.” Max admitted, hiding his
amusement. “So now you have Maria thinking she did something wrong, messed
things up, and you no longer want to be even her friend.”
“I know.” Michael stared at the TV. “I just took
another step back, and in truth, I’m exhausted trying to make up some
ground.”
“Okay, all is not lost. You only have to hold out forty
more days.”
“Eleven hours, twenty-four minutes, and some seconds.”
“I’m serious, you’re going to rot what's left of your
brain with this.” Max used his powers to turn off the TV. “Try getting up
and doing something productive.”
“I am showing an interest in the classics.” Michael
told Ma firmly. He had checked it out. If he could sustain a forty day
‘Bewitched’ marathon, then he’d be home free. Michael used his powers to
turn on the TV.
“You're wallowing in self-pity.” Max turned off his
powers to turn off the TV.
Michael was more than a little annoyed. “You know this is
my apartment! If I want to sit here a wallow, which I'm not, then that's my
business!” He tried to use his powers to turn on the TV, but because he was
upset, he blew up the TV instead. “Great! Thanks!”
“Oh yeah, that's my fault. I'm outta here. I'll see ya
later.” Max started to leave but he paused at the door. “I know you don’t
want to hear this, but do you honestly think you can afford to let Maria think
you don’t want a relationship with her, friendship or otherwise for the next
forty days? Maybe you should at least go back to the beginning, when you two
were just friends that hung out, and cool it down some until she’s of an age
when you can do something about it comfortably.”
Michael stared morosely at his TV. Now he had damn
scruples! This was stupid. He was lonely, and he missed spending time with
Maria. Maybe Max was right, he needed a new hobby.
~~~
Isabel was busy cleaning the chaos in her perfect little
home, cluttered by pizza boxes and beer bottles.
“The place is a wreck, I know.” Jesse told her when he
walked in the door and saw her cleaning. “We'll clean it up when we get back,
I swear, okay?” Isabel nodded wishing Eric would leave. Jesse hurried to the
bathroom door and knocked. “Come on, let’s go. We're gonna be late!”
Eric came out of the bathroom. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. You
know, I have an idea.”
“First time for everything,” Jesse teased his friend.
Eric laughed. “I want to write a story about you and
Isabel. It's a story about how two people marry in a hurry, and then have to do
all the get to, know you stuff later.”
Isabel hated the idea. “Sounds boring to me.”
“But I'm gonna pitch it so it sounds great. Hot shot
lawyer marries small town girl after whirlwind romance. My editor loves that
kind of crap.” Eric reassured Isabel.
“Are you saying the story of our marriage is crap?”
“Yeah, it's good solid horrible crap. Come on you guys, I
need your help. I need to sell something.”
There was a knock on the door, and Isabel was visibly
relieved. “I don't feel like being in a magazine right now,” she said as she
answered the door to Max.
“Hey.” Max said, looking past Isabel at Jesse and his
friend.
“Hey.” Isabel opened the door wider to let Max inside.
“Hey.” Eric said nodding to Max.
“Max,” Jesse said, “this is Eric, my friend. Eric,
this is Max, my brother-in-law.” Eric and Max shook hands.
“Hey.” Max said.
“Hi.” Eric looked Max over. “Oh, you're the guy with
the special healing powers.”
Max quickly waved his arm, and
Eric changed into a hound dog. “Somebody want to tell me what's going on?”
Max said to Isabel and Jesse.
Jesse stared at his friend in
shock. “Max, you just can’t go around turning people into dogs.”
“I won't stand here and be
lectured by the descendant of an ape.” Max said rudely in his superior alien
manner, tapping his foot as he looked at his sister.
“Max, change him back
please.” Isabel pleaded wringing her hands, use to playing the peacemaker
between the two men.
“He seems to know our little
secret. Now how could that have happened?”
“He doesn't know anything,
unless, of course, he's seen you flying around the neighborhood in the saucer
again.” Jesse said crossly at the buffoon. Brother-in-law or not, Max was an
idiot.
“You go for one joy ride, and
they never let you forget it.” Max complained.
“Max, I-- I don't want him to
piddle on the carpet.” Isabel begged wondering if her carpet had a special
decon stain resistant coating.
Max raised his index finger
hushing both Isabel and Jesse. “In a minute. Speaking of the saucer, Michael
burned out the cloaking device, so I had to park it in your basement for now.”
Jesse couldn’t believe this.
“In the basement?”
“Am I speaking too fast for
your human brain to follow?”
“How did you get it in
there?” Jesse asked as Max rolled his eyes.
“He used the time-space slip
stream, dear.” Isabel explained patting her husband sympathetically.
“Duh!”
“Great!” Jesse bent down and
covered the dogs ears with his hands, so he couldn’t hear what was being
discussed. “There's a reporter in the house with a flying saucer in the
basement.”
“Want me to take him to the
pound?” Max offered. Jesse picked up the dog keeping him away from Max.
“Just change him back
please.” Isabel asked nicely.
“Oh, very well.” Max changed
Eric back into a human, and Eric jumped out of Jesse's arms.
Isabel blinked as her daydream broke, and Max was saying
goodbye to Eric. “Nice to meet you.” Max said.
“I'll see you later.” Jesse kissed Isabel on the cheek.
“Bye. Have fun.” Isabel called to them as they left.
Isabel turned to Max. “Yeah, Jesse told him about the
whole broken nose incident, and they've been yakking it up ever since about how
I'm from a family of aliens.” Max smiled and tried not to laugh. “You think
that's funny.”
“Well-- Yeah. I mean, in an ironic sort of way. They're
just kidding around. If you make a big deal out of it, it will look
suspicious.”
“Yeah, maybe.” Isabel’s eyes narrowed. “What are
you doing here?”
“Inviting my sister to have a delicious piping hot
breakfast before her first class, my treat.”
“Oh. Where?” As if she didn’t know, and Max just
smiled.
Isabel and Max walked up to the Crashdown Café and Isabel
groaned. Her brother was going to be smelling like grease if he didn’t alter
his eating patterns.
“You don't need me as a chaperone. Liz's father has given
you the green light for you guys to be together.”
“I just don't want her dad to think I'm some loser who
doesn't have anything better to do all morning then sit in a booth and wait for
Liz to get off work.” Max told Isabel as he opened the Cafe door for Isabel.
They walked in.
Isabel laughed. “Must I make the obvious comment?”
“Please don't.”
Isabel groaned as she walked into the place and saw Liz
seeing them. She blinked …
Liz dressed at a 60s waitress
came up to them batting her eyes wildly. “Max.”
“Liz.”
“Max.”
“Liz.”
“Can we get a table for
two?” Isabel pleaded with the mooning couple, her stomach souring.
“Oh, certainly Isabel. You
must be here to have breakfast with Max,” Liz said in her loud squeaky voice,
talking louder so her dad could hear, “cuz he's certainly not here to see me,
are you Max?” Liz gives an outrageous wink at them that had Isabel gasping in
horror.
Max simpered back. “Certainly
not.”
“This way.” Liz showed them
to a booth as they sat down. Liz sighed dramatically mooning at Max on last time
before walking away. Max leaned his elbow in the table cupping his face in his
hand watching her leave.
“Eww!” Isabel startled herself out of that disturbing
daydream.
~~~
“Hey,” said Michael from the doorway of Maria’s room.
“I heard you were back and looking for me.”
“I was.” Maria smiled at him, happy to see him standing
there looking so … Michael. She got up and went over and hugged him, to
suddenly step back. He pulled back. Her face fused with color, then went pale.
“Sorry …” She gulped hard. “I’m sorry.” Her hands wringed as she
stared at him, confused and miserable.
“Maria,’ Michael groaned. “Don’t. This isn’t
about you.”
“No, of course it’s not.” Maria said hollowly. It
never is. She held her breath waiting for the ‘just friends’ speech. Maybe
she had been too needy, too clingy, and he …
“I’m going through some things right now … stuff that
I would share with you if I wasn’t afraid.”
“Afraid? I don’t understand.”
Michael sighed closing his eyes. He was ruining everything.
They had finally gotten on the same page, started to date officially, and now
this. Dammit, he just wanted his life to start. “I know you don’t, and
that’s because I won’t let you understand.” Michael took her hands. “I
know I’m going to be a little distant from you over the next few weeks, and I
don’t want you to read it wrong. It’s something I need to do just to stay
sane right now. I swear, when I can, I’ll tell you everything.”
“Okay.” Maria stared at him. “So can I touch you? Hug
you?” Maria’s voice softened. “Kiss you?”
“You can touch, definitely hug, but the kissing … um, I
get a little weak around the kiss part.”
Maria nodded. Friends. He wanted to be just friends.
Swallowing her disappointment, Maria smiled, but there was a sadness in her
eyes. Michael caught the look.
“Don’t,” he begged. “Don’t overthink this. I
promise, in just a few weeks, I’ll explain everything. I was making
arrangements for your birthday. Give me until then, okay?”
Maria nodded, uncertain where they were going from here.
Friends. She wasn’t sure she could do just friends. Staring up at him, she
felt an overwhelming need to cry. She just wanted to touch him, and … her
hands clenched.
Michael, needing to get something fresh between them, to
find some familiar ground quickly changed the subject. “So, I came by because
first, Max blew up my TV, and I need to replace it, so we need to go
shopping.”
“Max blew up your TV?”
“Yeah, and when he blames me, don’t believe him. It was
definitely his fault. Meddling busybody. He’s spending too much time with
Parker.”
“Okay.” Maria said sighing. It wasn’t like she was
going to spend much time over at Michael’s place anyway. It was too close, and
being next to him, and not able to … well, she couldn’t. Maria started to
back off from him in self protection, wanting to be stronger than that …
beyond old habits, but she couldn’t. She was still only a seventeen year old
girl. Maybe later, when she was older she could learn to live with the
disappointment, but right now? It just hurt. Everywhere. Looking at him …
hurt.
“Second, I’ve been told I need to either get a life or
get a hobby, so I decided on the hobby.”
“Okay.”
“Then let’s go!”
“Huh?” Maria blinked unsure how his new hobby applied
to her.
~~~
On the golf course, Eric, Jesse, and Mr. Evans were playing
golf. It was Mr. Evans's turn, Eric and Jesse were talking as they waited for
their turns.
“So, uh, when did you meet Isabel?” Eric asked.
“July 5th.” Jesse answered easily, remembering the day
well.
“July 5th? Isn't that your birthday?”
“Yeah, how about that for a present?” Jesse asked
smiling.
Eric nodded taking notes. The sheer romanticism of it was
… well cloying. “God, they're gonna eat this thing up.” Eric pulled a
flask and took a huge drink.
“Hey,” Jesse grabbed the flask from Eric, “did you
bring enough for everyone, or uh …”
“Yeah, where are my manners.” Eric laughed watching
Jesse take a drink. “So let me ask you this, was she still jail bait when you
met her?” Mr. Evans turned around from where he was teeing up to stare at
Jesse’s rude friend. Jesse mouth dropped, not believing Eric said that.
“She was eighteen.” Jesse said in a cold hard voice as
Philip looked back down at his ball. “
“Sorry.” Eric said not in the least bit contrite. Jesse
took another drink needing it as a golf ball came flying at him, and hit the
golf cart right beside him, and it slowly goes into the hole.
Michael suddenly appeared with Maria, both of them jumping
up and down in excitement as Michael yelled, “Yeah!!” excited over his shot.
Michael and Maria walked up to the three men.
Michael suddenly realized he forgot something. “Sorry,
oh, um, fore!! FORE!!! Everybody, fore!” Michael picked up his ball from
inside the hole nodding to the other men. “Mr. Evans, Jesse.”
Maria was still whooping it up. “Oh my god! Did you see
that shot?! It was incredible. You could be a whacked out golf pro! Do it
again!”
“Hey, uh, Michael and Maria, did you meet my friend,
Eric?” Jesse asked.
“Hey.” Michael said as he shook Eric’s hand.
“Hey.” Eric said socially, his eyes falling on Maria.
“We’ve met,” he told the others as he smiled at the blonde.
“Right at Isabel’s yesterday.” Maria said, squeaking
when Michael reached out and pulled her close to him glaring at the man
suspiciously.
“I didn't know you played golf.” Philip Evans said to
Michael.
“Just started. Maria and I are looking for a new hobby
together since she’s terrible at bowling,” Michael ignored Maria’s
grievance assurance that she was improving, “and I really suck at dancing.
We’re looking to get out of the house.” Philip nodded. respecting the quest
for a new hobby. “Did you see that shot off the golf cart in the hole? You
don't see that every day.” Michael said proudly. Yeah, he got it. He was
already lining up his next fantastic shot, off a few trees.
“Michael, I'm gonna go out on a limb here and take a
guess you're not a member of the Glen Hills Country Club.” Philip said.
“Oh?” Maria said. “Is that a problem? I mean we come
here all the time at night to drive the carts, and …” Michael quickly
covered Maria’s mouth.
Michael smiled charmingly. “Not officially.”
Philip laughed, amused by the two teens. “Then you better
stick with us.”
“Cool. Are we playing for money or what?” Michael asked
his eyes getting that special gleam as he went on the mark.
Philip laughed. “We might be able to do that.” Philip
looked at Maria. “Are you in, Maria?”
“Oh, no! This is my first time, and I don’t have
Michael’s natural talent. I’ll just play through with you guys, but as far
as betting? I’ll leave that up to Space… um, Michael.” Maria corrected
glancing shrewdly at Eric, not wanting to mention aliens.
“Great, we’ll let Maria go first.” Michael said. He
took another ball out of pocket to replace the last few Maria already lost.
Putting it on the tee, he watched as she lined up her shot, his arms coming
around her from behind to help her get the grip right. He whispered in her ear
which had her giggling, and Michael moved even closer into her forgetting he was
trying to keep her a little away from him for his own sanity and frustration
level until she was eighteen.
Eric watched the two, and cleared his throat. He slapped
Jesse on the shoulder. “Flask.” He took a drink to ease his dry throat. He
was seriously in need of finding female companionship soon, these two were
getting him aroused. “These two are very close.” he commented.
“Aren’t they?” Philip said, frowning. He never took
note, but it was apparent with the way they were comfortable in each other’s
arms. It hit him that he was looking at teens the same age as his son. Isabel
had been a hard adjustment, but now he was suddenly wondering about Max. Teens
seemed to grow up so fast nowadays, and he just realized he didn’t even know
if his son was sexually active, especially since moving into Michael’s place.
Maria swung. She stared trying to figure out where her ball
went. “I don’t see it,” she complained. Michael whistled to her and
pointed downward at her ball still in the tee. She had missed. “Aw, shoot!
Again?” Maria complained. Michael laughed at the look on her face, and helped
her to swing. This time, he used his powers to give the ball a little something.
The other men watched the ball go straight and high down
the center of the fairway onto the green.
“Wow.” Philip said in awe.
“Is that good?” Maria asked.
“Good one, Maria.” Michael congratulated her. She
giggled, happy with this new hobby. She could definitely do this game. Since
being upset about Michael and their relationship, this new hobby was taking her
mind off it, and she was having fun.
~~~
“So I've been doing some more thinking about this whole
Bewitched-type dream.” Isabel told Max, needing to get that damn sitcom out of
her head. The daydreams were weirding her out.
“You have?” Max added more
“Yes. And the more and more I think about it, the more
convinced I am that it would be in everyone’s best interest to bring my Darren
in on the secret.”
“Mm-hmm.”
“Yeah. I mean, as it is now, Jesse is a wild card. For
example, if he knew the secret, he would know what to say and what not to say to
his buddy, the reporter looking for a hot story.”
“Good point.”
“Yeah.” Isabel smiled glad Max was seeing this her way.
“Let me think about it.”
Liz walked over to them smiling. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, just, uh, talking about how things would be much
easier if we lived in a sitcom.” Max explained.
Liz frowned. “Like Frasier?”
Max made a face. “More like ‘My Favorite Martian.’”
“I was thinking more like ‘Bewitched.’” Isabel said
not wanting anymore sitcoms in her head. One was enough.
“Liz?” Mr. Parker called to his daughter.
Isabel blinked again …
60s Liz turned around to see her
father, Mr. Parker in a butcher's outfit with a cleaver in his hand. The man was
angry waving his cleaver at Max.
“Didn't I tell you to stay
away from my daughter?”
“I--I'm just having breakfast
with my sister.” Max said as Mr. Parker walked up to them. Max pointed at
Isabel. “See? Here she is, my sister. Say ‘Hi, sister.’”
“Hi, Sister,” Isabel
repeated obediently.
“If I catch you with your
hands on my daughter, why I,” Mr. Parker held up the cleaver threateningly,
and started to hit Max with it. The cleaver turned into a bouquet of flowers.
“Gee, thanks Mr. Parker.”
Max took the flowers smelling them while batting his eyes at Mr. Parker.
“They're lovely.”
“Max,” said Mr. Parker.
“Mr. Parker.” Max simpered.
“Max.”
“Mr. Parker.”
Isabel startled her face turning pale. Double eww and spew!
“God, I’ve got to get therapy!”
Max looked at his sister confused. “Huh?”
~~~
On the golf course, Eric and Michael were talking as Mr.
Evans was showing Maria how to hold her iron. Since Michael had only one, he was
letting her use his different ones, and Michael watched, amused, as Maria
charmed Mr. Evans’s socks off.
“So how long have you known Max and Isabel?” Eric
asked.
“A long, long time. We kind of gravitated toward each
other in elementary.” Michael answered truthfully, not seeing any reason to
lie. It was Michael's turn to shoot. “You know, they had nice parents, and I
was in a foster system.” Michael continued as he lined up his shot. He hit the
ball at the last minute looked up when Mr. Evans said something to Maria that
made her laugh. “Ah, slice.”
“Oh, you picked you head up at the last minute.” Mr.
Evans offered a tip on golfing to the young boy who was surprisingly good for a
first timer.
“Yeah, it's in the trees.” Jesse helpfully pointed out
where Michael’s ball landed. “You want to take a mulligan?” Jesse asked
offering Michael the chance to reshoot without penalty, even though Michael was
leading on their bet.
“No, I don't do drugs.” Michael said waving off the
offer. “All right, you guys play ahead. I gotta find my ball.” He noticed
Maria starting to follow the other men, and nabbed her quickly. “Oh no, you
get to come with me.” Michael said.
“In the woods?” Maria said teasing him. “Oh, Mr.
Guerin!”
“Shut up, and I’ll let you carry my balls.”
“Oh, Mr. Guerin!!” Maria simpered laughing as she
followed Michael.
~~~
Jesse and Eric were sitting in the golf cart as they
watched Michael and Maria disappear.
“So that kid's an emancipated minor?” Eric said
watching Michael thoughtfully.
“Yep, our firm handled the case. Watch this, on the green
in two.” They got out of the cart.
“Hey, uh, you wouldn't mind if I uh...,” Eric held of
his hand to his mouth indicating smoking.
“What? Get stoned on the fairway?” Jesse asked. “Yes.
It's my father-in-law's private club. Go in the bushes like everyone else.”
Michael was in the woods searching for his ball with Maria,
half-listening to her talk about how nice Mr. Evans was to help her golf.
Michael found his ball and looked around.
“Those trees are blocking my shot.” Michael complained
to Maria. “If they weren’t I’d be right on the green.”
“Aw, take two shots.” Maria suggested.
Eric came out from behind the tree smoking pot noticing the
two teens. He spent a moment contemplating Maria’s legs when Michael turned
around, not seeing him. Michael used his powers to bend the trees out of the
way. Michael hit his ball clear landing directly on the green.
“That’s cheating!” Maria told Michael. “Isn’t
that cheating?”
“Nope. Just talent.” Michael said leading her through
the trees to catch up with the others.
“Oh, well I guess as long as you’re sure that isn’t
cheating.” Eric watched at Michael and Maria disappeared having seen the whole
thing. He looked down at his joint confused.
~~~
Eric told Jesse what he saw Michael do outlining his
article about it. Jesse laughed not believing his friend. “No one,” Jesse
laughed, “and I mean no one is going to print that.”
“All right, maybe not the New York Times, dude, but
definitely the Post.”
“C’mon Eric give me a break.” Jesse said lounging
back on the sofa holding his beer.
“Okay, look, I know what it sounds like but I saw what I
saw.”
“Yeah.” Jesse was laughing it up as Isabel walked in.
“What's up?” she asked looking between Jesse and his
friend.
“Oh, you're gonna love this.” Jesse promised her. “Go
ahead, tell her.” He invited Eric to make a fool of himself in front of
Isabel.
“All right. You know your friend Michael?” Isabel
nodded. “He waved his hand, and I dunno-- like he had super powers of
something.”
Jesse couldn’t stop laughing, falling over in mirth.
“Yeah, he had, super powers!!” Jesse held up 2 beer bottles to his
eyes and laughed.
“All right. All kidding aside. I'm telling you, there's
something definitely strange about that kid. I don't know if it's because he's a
psychic or a space alien or what,” Jesse put the 2 beer bottles on his head
like antennae laughing hard as Eric glared at him, “but one thing is for sure,
Michael Guerin is definitely not of this world.”
~~~
“You idiot!” Isabel said hotly in the phone, talking
low so Eric and Jesse couldn’t hear her in the next room.
“How was I supposed to know he was watching?” Michael
reasoned, pushing Maria away so she couldn’t eavesdrop on the conversation.
“Here's a thought, maybe you shouldn't be using your
powers to improve your golf game.”
Maria gasped, having heard that anyway. “I knew you were
cheating! Damn, Michael, you took their money, and …”
Michael made face waving off Maria reasoning. Hey, she
wasn’t in the betting pool, so why should she care? “I didn't think anyone
was around, okay?”
“Well, that right there is the problem. You didn't
think.” Isabel said nastily, feeling her life overwhelming her. “We need a
real plan.”
“I'll talk to him, okay?” Michael offered making a face
at Maria.
“I cannot believe this is happening.” Isabel said
letting her usual flare for the over dramatics sweep her.
Michael swore under his breath. If she started ‘oh my
god-ing’ all over the place, he was hanging up. “Will you relax? I'm on
it.”
Isabel took a long calming breath. “Can we just all take
a minute, okay? Okay. Michael what are you going to tell Eric?”
“I'll think of something.”
“I don't know what worries me more when you don't think
or when you do.”
Michael made a face at the phone. “That's funny. You
should be on a sitcom.” Michael hung up after agreeing to meet Isabel, Jesse
and Eric in an hour at the Crashdown. Maria was biting her lip.
“So what is going to happen?” she asked him.
Michael scratched his brow. “Who knows, and who cares?
Wanna come too? If nothing else, we can have fun watching Isabel melt down.”
“Are you buying me food?”
“Always with the snacks.”
“Hey, I’m just on the keen side of peachy.”
~~~
Michael, Maria, Isabel, Jesse, and Eric were sitting at a
table talking with Maria sitting back eating while watching them talk like it
was some great spectator sport.
“I know what I saw, Michael.” Eric told the youth.
Michael made a face his voice becoming sarcastic. “Yeah,
you saw me wave a magic wand and bend a tree.”
Isabel laughed as did Maria.
“No wand, it was just your hand.” Eric said nodding to
Maria. “Ask your girlfriend, she was there.”
Maria stopped eating her mouth opening. “Michael has a
girlfriend?” She stared at him, hurt and angry.
“He means you!” Michael told her.
“Oh! Cool.” Maria sucked on her straw.
“Let me ask you something...” Michael said leaning on
the table conspiratorially. “What was really in the flask?”
“Scotch.”
“Uh-huh.” Michael lifted a brow. “What were you doing
in the bushes?”
“I was looking for a place to, you know, relieve
myself.” Eric lied.
“Come on, you weren't …?” Michael held up his hand to
his mouth indicating smoking.
“Yeah, it was just a little.” Eric admitted.
“He was doing a Mulligan?” Maria asked, confused why
this man had such a thing for drugs. Geez.
“Yeah, right.” Jesse snickered at the ‘little’ part
of Eric’s confession.
“Okay, dude, it was like the fat ones we rolled in the
old days, all right?” Jesse kicked Eric, not wanting to admit to Isabel he use
to smoke in college.
“Really?” Isabel said staring at Jesse.
“Nice laptop,” Michael said ignoring the Ramirez’s as
Maria went to refill her vanilla shake. He reached over to touch it.
“What--uh, G4?”
“No, it's just an old dinosaur.” Eric’s mouth opened
at he stared at his computer as it crashed. “Oh, no. Don't tell me this …”
Eric said in disbelief as he began to bang on the keys.
Maria came back with her shake and one for Michael. She
frowned at the man. “Is he still tripping?”
“Must be. Thanks, honey.” Michael said nicely as
Maria scrunched up her nose at him.
“Wow, drugs really are bad! If you do drugs … you’re
bad.” Maria said quoting a favorite
“Sweetheart, can I see you outside for a minute?”
Isabel asked ignoring Michael and Maria and their usual stand-up boob routine.
Jesse frowned at his friend, but nodded. “Yeah, sure.”
He got up and followed Isabel outside as Eric was frantically trying to fix his
computer.
Michael sighed, “Technology.”
Maria nodded sucking on her shake. “It’s tragic.”
Outside Isabel begged Jesse to get Eric to stop the story,
to stop invading her privacy, and that of her friends and family. She told him
how being deserted in the desert was something she never go over, something she
never wanted to know more about, and it brought up all kinds of questions about
where she came from, and what kind of people she came from. What kind of people
dump children in the desert?
Jesse nodded. He could understand how uncomfortable that
would be for her, so he promised.
~~~
Eric was in Jesse’s office while Jesse was working
getting ready for court. Eric watched as Jesse got a file, and flipped through
it.
“Just do me a favor, drop the story on Isabel and me, all
right?”
“Yes. All right, whatever, man.” Eric said distracted
by his crashed computer.
“I'm serious.”
“I'm serious too. I hear you. I'll drop the story. I
promise. Let me ask you something, am I insane or did Michael touch this
computer before it crashed?”
“Hey you know something? You're right. You're insane.”
Jesse confirmed.
“Well, this thing is totally screwed.” Eric gave up
closing the laptop. “Mind if I use your computer to check my email?”
“Go ahead. I'm in court until four. Look, are you up for
dinner later?”
“Ha, ha! Do I have any other options?”
“Later.” Jesse said looking at his watch.
“Good luck.” Eric waited until Jesse was gone to go
over to the filing cabinet. He unlocked it the way Jesse had done earlier and
searched for a file. Michael Guerin. Taking the folder, he sat down and started
to read.
~~~
Eric used the file to track down an old caseworker on
Michael’s case. He met her in the park. “You know, all adoptions and foster
records are supposed to be confidential.”
“I understand that. I won't use your name in the article,
and I won't quote you directly. I'm just--I'm just trying to do some background
research on Michael Guerin, and I was wondering if you can help. You know, was
there anything unusual about Michael, anything out of the ordinary?”
“No.” The woman shook her head, but then frowned.
“Well, there was this one incident in 1989. It was right after the county
placed him in his foster home. He'd been there less than two days when we get
this phone call about this … unusual event.”
“An event?” Eric prompted.
“They said Michael made the kitchen table levitate off
the floor. About three feet off the floor.”
“That's--that's a little odd for a six year old.”
“Mm-hmm.”
Eric looked down at this notes. “Umm, would that be in
the county records?”
The woman laughed. “You think we're gonna put something
like that in a government file? Yeah, and uh, to be honest with you, Michael's
foster father wasn't exactly reliable. You know.” She made a gesture to Eric
indicating drinking.
“A real good place to park a small child, huh?” Eric
shook his head, missing the real story about the placement of a child in an
abusive household. “Anything else?”
“No, I mean, other than the way he came to us. You know,
a little kid was found wandering out in the desert like that.”
“Wait a minute,” Eric stopped writing, “I thought
that Max and Isabel were the ones found wandering in the desert.”
“They were. About a week before.”
Eric’s eyes took on a glint as something interesting
finally clicked. “That--that's a story.”
~~~
Eric walked into the Ramirez's house as Jesse was preparing
dinner. “I got my story. I really got it.”
Jesse shook his head at his friend’s enthusiasm. “What
is it?”
“It's about three little kids found wandering in the
desert. It's about three little kids with special powers. It's about Max,
Michael, and Isabel.”
“Wait, you told me you were dropping this.”
“Yeah, no I did, and dude, I swear to god I was going
to,” Isabel was coming into the kitchen to help with dinner when she heard
Eric, stopping she stood out of sight and listened. “Then I got a call from
one of my sources who tells me about this social worker whose got a story and
does she ever. She tells me that Michael Guerin is levitating tables at the age
of six.”
Jesse laughed. “You don't believe that.”
“It doesn't matter, I don't have to believe it; I don't
have to prove it. All I need is credible sources and between the social worker
and you, I got plenty.”
“Me?!?” Jesse said his voice rising.
“Yeah, yeah, the broken nose incident with the meat and
the mysterious ice maker incident.”
“But--but that wasn't for you to write.” Jesse said
suddenly understanding Isabel’s reaction to being investigated, and used for a
story.
“Dude, relax. I'm not going to use your name. Come on
Jesse. This could be huge for me, don't you get it? Look at--look at-- I've got
mysteriously sealed records, I've got a number of sources, this thing has
government conspiracy written all over it. I mean, the story is going to go
national.”
“Just wait, wait, okay? Just slow down.” Jesse tried to
wrap his mind around Eric’s story. “What is the story?”
“Max, Michael, and Isabel, they are the
~~~
Isabel, Michael, and Max were sitting in Max's car as
Isabel told them about the conversation she overheard, her anxiety and fear
evident not only in her voice, but on her face.
“I think you both are over reacting. No serious magazine
is going to print that story. Three alien kids in the desert? It's ridiculous.
The best thing he's gonna do is get some quick cash from some tabloid.”
Michael swore. He had things to do. He wanted to sneak into a movie with Maria,
and eat lots of popcorn. This Eric dude was a real drag.
“Yeah, they're gonna plaster our faces all over the cover
of The Enquirer.” Isabel told an
unconcerned Michael.
“It’ll draw attention.” Max pointed out. “Even if
people don't believe it at first, it will make people think.”
“Fine, so it's really bad and it's all my fault!”
Michael’s jaw clenched in anger. How the hell could he remember what he did at
six any more than Max remembered healing the damn bird! This sucked … again.
“Is everybody happy now?”
Isabel didn’t have time for another round of whose fault
it was, they were being threatened with exposure. “This isn't helping,
Michael.”
Michael sighed. Not it wasn’t, and it was wrecking his
life. “What are we gonna do?”
“I have no idea.” Max said honestly.
~~~
Isabel was late getting back, and she tried to climb in bed
without disturbing Jesse.
“I'm awake.”
“Oh. It's late.”
“Yeah, where have you been?”
“I just went for a walk.” Isabel lied.
Jesse turned to face her. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.” What else could she say?
“Is there anything … unusual about you? Anything I
should know about?”
“Like what?” Isabel held her breath. This was it. She
should just confess, and get it over, Max or Michael’s permission or not.
“I don't know exactly. But just--some strange things have
happened, and things I have tried to ignore but I can’t. So, I guess I'm
asking, um, do you have some kind of psychic ability?”
Isabel smiled, amusement in her voice. “Psychic?”
Jesse laughed hearing her tone. “I know how that
sounds.” He laughed, but then went serious again. “Certain things just make
me wonder.”
“Like what?”
“Like our sex life. Not that I'm complaining. It's--sex
with you is almost hallucinogenic, like I'm on acid or something. I mean, not
that I've ever done that. But I'm--I'm--I don't know--It's just weird. I love
it. I love it. It's definitely weird.”
Great, Maria was right … intense. Isabel rolled on top of
Jesse and turned on the bedside lamp. “Jesse, are you stoned?”
Jesse could stop laughing. It was insane, insane that he
would even ask. “Oh, I am such an idiot.”
“Psychic, like Carrie?”
Isabel said with a teasing look on her face.
“Okay. Stop.”
“You sure you went to Harvard?” she teased, her tone
implying she doubted it.
Jesse laughed, “I get it, okay? Just forget it. Turn off
the light, I feel...,” he turned off the light, “...stupid with the light
on.”
Isabel turned the light back on. “Oh, but in the dark,
it's okay to think you're married to a witch.”
“Yes. Turn it off. Come on, turn it off.” Isabel turned
off the light. “I can’t believe I said that.”
“Yeah.” Isabel snuggled up on his chest.
“Well, if you think that sounded crazy wait until you
hear Eric's latest idea.”
“What's that?” Isabel asked, already knowing what he
was going to say.
“You're never going to believe this. He's actually got a
story that sounds like you, Max, and Michael are all the
“Huh.”
“Yeah.”
“Wow.” Isabel sat up a little. “Are you sure your
friend is a real reporter, and not just some tabloid hack? I mean, he has to
know there’re no
“Actually, I think she’s on his list too. Something
about her lip gloss being unnatural.”
“Wow, what a hack. I hope he doesn’t chase down Amy
DeLuca, cause then he would really know.”
~~~
Jesse and Mr. Evans were sitting in Mr. Evans' office going
over morning briefs. “The
“He's just trying to make a sale. I seriously doubt he
even believes it himself.”
“So who’s this social worker who found this nonsense
about these kids having psychic powers?”
“He wouldn't say. He said he promised her anonymity, and
uh, frankly I don't even know how he tracked this person down. All those records
are supposed to be kept under seal.”
“You know what? We might have her name. Pull Michael's
emancipation files. It might have a list of his counselors over at
“That's a good idea.” Jesse walked over to the filing
cabinets, and looked for Michael's files. “It's not here.” He told Philip.
“What do you mean?” Philip frowned, not pleased with
his confidential files turning up missing.
“It's not here unless it was misfiled or …” Jesse’s
face paled as it dawned on him. Not unless Eric took it.
~~~
“You stole it!” Jesse accused his friend.
“Come on Jesse, I was gonna give it back tomorrow. It's
no big deal.”
“You know what you did was a felony!” Isabel was
sitting in a chair watching her husband fight with his friend, her face drawn
and upset. “That I could have you arrested just by picking up the phone!”
“Hey, easy.” Eric held up his hands. “I know you're
pissed off, but I am just doing my job. I am a reporter, Jesse. It's a good
story.”
“Well, not anymore it isn't.” Jesse took out a piece of
paper from his jacket pocket and handed it to Eric.
Eric stared at the paper. “What is this?”
“That's an injunction, preventing you from selling or
attempting to sell any information based on illegal access to records protected
by attorney-client privilege.”
“I don't believe this.”
“Yeah, well, believe it.” Jesse told Eric, his jaw
clenching in anger. “Now just pack your stuff and get out!”
“What?!?”
“Look Eric, I asked you to drop the story as a friend,
and what did you do? You lied to me. You knew you weren't gonna let it go.”
“I'm sorry.” Eric said contritely, really not wanting
to lose Jesse’s friendship over this.
“Sorry? Eric you looked me in the eye and told me that
one of your sources put you onto the social worker when the truth was you stole
it from my own office!!”
“All right, I screwed up. I admit it. I won't write the
stupid alien story, but come on, Jesse, this is you and me man, we go back.”
“No. You can insult me, you can hit me, you can do almost
anything you want to me, and usually, I'll find a way to get over it. Okay? But
you can’t lie to me in my own house!” Jesse ranted making Isabel cringe, as
she thought of the lies she told him, specifically last night when she had a
chance to come clean. “You can’t take advantage of my trust and my
friendship!! I want you gone!” Jesse threw Eric's stuff at him. “And don't
come back!” Jesse held the door open inviting Eric to leave slamming the door
behind him. Isabel’s body jumped at the violent slam, her mind wandering to
her current escape from a burgeoning reality.
Isabel and Max were sitting
inside the spaceship as Max was cleaning the window.
“None of this would be
necessary if we could just tell the humans the truth.” Isabel said.
“Are you serious?” Max
scoffed at his mentally challenged sister who was more window dressing than
actual brains. “These primates have barely mastered walking upright. They
couldn't handle the truth.”
“Jesse did just fine.”
Max snorted sarcastically.
“Yeah, he's a real genius.”
“You're talking about my
husband.”
“Must you remind me?” Max
said bitterly.
“If it weren't for Jesse
…” Isabel pointed out.
“Life would be much
quieter.”
“And I would be miserable.”
Isabel said with a sigh. “We're meant to be together, Max, you're just gonna
have to accept that.”
“Isabel, it's bad enough that
you married one of them, but try to remember that you are a member of a superior
race of beings. A race that has conquered the mysteries of space travel. A race
that stands head and shoulders above these primitive monkeys.”
Michael stood up from where he
had been monkeying around below. “I found the problem with the spaceship. My
yoyo was caught in the warp drive.”
“Well, some of us stand a
little taller than others.” Max admitted.
Max, Michael, and Isabel were walking down the street
talking about what happened between Jesse and Eric. “So Jesse saved the
day.”
“Yeah.”
“I know what you're gonna say,” Max said, “that's
twice now that he saved us, so now he's earned the right to know the truth. And
I don't necessarily disagree, but I think that before …”
“No, Max I-- I'm really not pushing to tell him right
now. He was really mad, and I've never seen him so angry, you know, and he was
angry because he was lied to by someone he trusted.” Isabel looked straight
ahead knowing she had already broken that solemn trust, afraid that Jesse would
find it unforgivable.
“You're his wife, he'll forgive you.” Max said hating
to see her so unhappy.
“Maybe. But he'll never forget that I lied. You know, it
will always be there between us. I want to tell him, but I'm afraid to. The
problem is I don't live in a sitcom. You know? They get to wrap everything up
all nice and neat. Real life is complicated.”
~~~
“So
what’s the problem?” Maria asked, watching Michael destroy the cleanness of
his kitchen.
“I
don’t know.” Michael searched in the refrigerator. “Max is okay with it,
but I can’t stay settled with it.” Michael shut the door and leaned his head
against the door.
“Is
it the file on you?” Maria asked quietly. “Or is it Hank?”
Michael
glanced at her. “Will I ever be free of him?”
Maria’s
eyes filled with tears. “We are who they made us,” she said thinking of her
father, “that doesn’t have to be a bad thing.”
“It
doesn’t have to be good either … most of the time, it’s not good.”
Michael stood facing the refrigerator barely holding the rage inside. His past.
His world. The place they threw him. It was the nightmare he could never escape.
“What do I do with this rage, Maria? It touches something in me. Something I
feel helpless to control it at times. I scare myself.”
Maria
moved against his back, her head leaned into his body, as she used her body to
comfort his, giving him contact … human contact. She seemed to realize what
she was doing, and she stood unsure for a second, stepping back. He didn’t
want that … he didn’t want her that way.
“I
should go,” she said quietly. She didn’t really belong there.
“Stay.”
Michael begged. She would destroy his control, but he needed her. He always
needed her human touch.
“I
can’t.” Maria backed away taking her bag. “You don’t want
… I can’t do that anymore.” Michael stood still until he heard the
door softly close behind her.
“Sonnabitch!!!!” Michael yelled knocking everything off the counter.
He was torn between what he wanted to do, and what he should do. Forty days. He
couldn’t last another twenty-four hours.
He
never meant to make her unsure. Michael walked to his bedroom, no longer hungry,
and insatiable at the same time, the rage and anguish building as a sonic boom
hit the town, and windows shattered everywhere.
