PyGMALION

By DocPaul

Chapter Twenty-three:  Touch My world with your fingertips…

Day Thirty-five: Monday, 9:13 am

“No, that can’t be right. Read it to me again.” Maria paused and searched around for a pencil. “Did you contact Eddie? He was there when I ordered the materials.” She paused. “Jay, that’s impossible. That would be an increase of almost three hundred pounds of plaster. We wouldn’t use that in six months, let alone a year. The invoice is wrong. Send it back.”

Michael came down the stairs and frowned at the sight of the white cat and the black cat happily eating next to Maria while she petted them absently as she did museum business on the telephone. That damn Boo was purring so loud that it was a disgrace, and seeing Michael, the black cat moved over more closely onto her lap, accepting more strokes as he purred even louder.

“Show-off! She didn’t even think about you once while we were gone.”

Maria hung up the phone. Pushing the cat off her lap, she paused to stroke Ms. Fluffy again. “Detective, you’ve got to stop this insane competition you have with the Boo.”

Michael’s eyes narrowed as he took in the solid black cat. Obviously constant kitty nookie worked wonders. The cat was no longer nappy, and he obviously had stopped shedding his fur. “At least he finally found his own girl. Call Mac and tell her to come get her deranged feline. Any cat that finds the tubby Mr. B. sexy has got to have mental problems. That’s the last thing we need. Another emotionally challenged cat.”

“Don’t listen to him. Either of you. You are perfectly well-balanced. He’s just upset because you got luckier than he did last night. That, and you disturbed his sleep.”

“Hey, I got lucky enough!” Michael suspected Maria was making fun of him as a smile pulled at the corner of her mouth. He grabbed her, and laughing she tried to wiggle free. “Wouldn’t you say I got lucky, Professor?”

Maria wound her arms around his neck. “Oh, indeed! You were very, very lucky!” Maria looked down at the black cat winding himself around Michael’s ankles trying to make up to him. “Michael, I know we put Mr. Booboo on a d-i-e-t, but doesn’t he actually look f-a-t-t-e-r?”

“Professor, I am not going to spell words around the Immensely Tubby One. No way.”

Maria got up to answer the ringing phone. “Afraid you can’t spell?” She stuck her tongue out at him. “DeLuca and Guerin. We’re not currently home right now. Should you leave your name and phone number, we’ll get back to you in say…a few years. Leave your message after the beep.” Maria paused. “Beep.”

“Cute, sweetie.”

“Mom?” Maria sat down again on Michael’s lap. “How are you? How are you feeling? Is the leg okay? Is Jim…”

“Yes to all of those. So, what did you bring me?” Maria laughed and made arrangements to meet her mother later in the morning. Michael forestalled her by taking the phone.

“Amy.” Michael made a face as Maria tried to take back the phone. “Maria can’t meet you until this afternoon. We have a doctor’s appointment at eleven, and then I was taking her to lunch.” Michael listened to Amy go through her schedule for a few moments, and finally giving up, he passed the phone to Maria. He deposited her on the sofa and went to find his cell phone.

“Parker? It’s Michael.” Michael waited for Liz to stop congratulating him on his wedding and asking about the honeymoon. “Yes, it was fine. Lovely. Great. Didn’t want to come back. Listen shut your trap, and let me tell you why I called.” Michael realizing he was being rude, tried to cover it up. “Maria wants to tell you all about the honeymoon herself, and she brought you and Isabel matching presents.” Michael rolled his eyes as Liz went off again about...well....nothing that was interesting him. “Parker? Parker! Why I called?” Michael finally got a word in edgewise. “Maria has an appointment today. How are we for blood samples to replace hers?”

“What time?” Liz frowned and looked at her watch. She was at work, and lately people were noticing her periods of absence. It had been so much easier when she was a little brown mouse that blended into the woodwork. Lately, it was like people were searching her out. She called it the Guerin-DeLuca suck zone.

“Eleven.”

Liz picked up her other phone and made a quick call. “Hang on, Michael.” She waited as the line connected. After a few moments, she talked to Michael again. “It’s fine. My person is home, so I’ll swing by and take a blood sample. I’ll meet you at the doctor’s office just before the appointment. You need to have a jacket or something to hold the sample in a small cup of ice.”

“Done. See you then.” Michael started to hang up but stopped himself. “Liz. Thanks.”

Maria had finished talking to her mom, and was watching him. Michael smiled slightly at the soft look in her eyes. She stared at him a lot lately. “What?” Maria just shrugged. Coming to him, she ran her hands over his face and leaned in to kiss him.

“My babies are very lucky to have you as their daddy.”

Michael was for a moment, speechless. She did that to him a lot. With Maria, it was never how much was spent, it was all about effort and the care put into things. It was always the little things from her that meant so much. Noticing him. Noticing the effort he went through to give her things. He never had to be rich or famous to be a hero in her eyes, and that in itself was everything.

~~~

The bullpen was a swarm of activity when Max got back from the meeting. He was tired. Not enough sleep, and a too early meeting sapped away all his ability to think straight. That name kept roaming around his brain. Vanessa. She wanted Jonathan. Damn.

“Max, how did it go?”

“You don’t want to know, Cap. It’s not pretty.” Jim grimaced. The man looked too aware. Max’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. Cap had been coming in most mornings early, but today he came in later, late enough to miss the departmental meeting.

“Let’s hear it.”

“Undercover operation. They’re short handed, and are asking for our people.”

Jim groaned. “Our man-hour timesheets are already stretched. We need some extra help ourselves. What are we talking about here?”

“A large operation. It’s not going to be pretty. I promise you that.”

Jim grabbed his cup and went to take his seat behind his desk. His left arm was still in the sling, but he was coping. It hurt almost all the time. The nerves were slowly coming back and the constant jerking of his muscles and the tingling was killing him. Work helped. Amy had started a new project, and it was too scary to stay home. Jim guzzled his coffee as Max outlined the interdepartmental taskforce. His distress becoming more apparent as his coffee ran out. Not pretty? Jim laughed at the irony. Actually it was too horrific to even contemplate. They needed ten, and they only had four female detectives. An unholy six...

~~~

“Jonathan, there is a Congresswoman Whit…”

“Send her in.” Poor Jillian. The woman needed a raise, or at the very least a permanent promotion. Acting as his administrative assistant while his regular one was on maternity leave, she had taken on a job of insurmountable proportions. Vanessa. Congresswoman Vanessa Whitaker. His ex-wife. Thank god!

“Ma’am, you can’t go in there…”

“Jonathan!” The woman slammed the door in the outraged face of Jillian. Vanessa smiled. Large. Greasy. Queasy. Nauseating. Damn. A whole plethora of adjectives all meaning one thing raged through his mind. She definitely wanted something.

Bending down, Jonathan kissed Vanessa on her soft perfumed cheek, involuntarily moving her shoulder length brunette hair back from her face, and behind an ear. Jonathan almost smiled as he saw her eyes narrow at the gesture. She hated that. Hated having him push her hair out of her face. It was evident in the unblinking coolness of her hazel eyes. Oh boy. Nothing ever changes.

“Van, must you run over every assistant I’ve ever had? Jillian is a temporary, so be kind.” Removing her hands from his body, he stepped back and casually leaned against the desk. That was good. Very good. Calm. Picture of health, both mentally and physically. Righteous. Jonathan almost chuckled at the Guerinism he just used. Over a year ago, the word ‘righteous’ was hardly a blip in his vocabulary.

“Jonnieeeee.....so cruel. When am I ever unkind?” Vanessa ignored the hint of irritation in his eyes as he shortened his name to a version he found utterly repulsive.

“Why don’t you just ask, and then go away?”

“Mean?” Vanessa tapped a perfectly polished and shaped nail against her front teeth. “I don’t remember you being mean. Just indifferent.”

“I hide my feelings well.”

Vanessa walked around his office picking up things distractedly. “Didn’t realize you had any. When did that happen?”

Bitch. Jonathan sat back firmly on his desk. She was making it so much easier on him. He could handle this. “The moment I divorced you, this immeasurable weight was lifted, and voila, I was transformed into a living, breathing, feeling human. Amazing what a little warmth can do to a soul.”

Vanessa laughed and went to stand up next to him. “I hadn’t realized that you were concerned about us being ‘warm’, Jonnie. The sex was…”

“Sex.” Jonathan pushed her off him again. “What is it, Van?” Jonathan crossed his arms across his chest. “What do you need?”

Vanessa pouted, her mouth pursing into a moody display of hurt feelings. “Maybe I just missed you? Would that be so hard to believe?”

“Actually, yes. Congresswoman, you want to come clean or do I need to start guessing?” Jonathan pointedly looked at his watch. “You’ve got five minutes, and then my time is suddenly money again.”

“So how is the boyfriend?”

“Uh huh. Four minutes.”

“You used to be more fun.” Jonathan looked at his watch pointedly. Whatever. The man wasn’t playing. “I need help with a fundraiser, and you…”

“I’m sorry. I’m too busy right now to help you with your fundraising campaigns.” It was obvious that Vanessa was at the end of her term in the Congress. She only received the appointment after her husband died in a tragic accident before he could assume the office. Now she was looking at re-election, and if she wanted to retain her newfound position, she needed voter approval.

“Jonnie, I really need your help. This is nothing for you. You’ve got the money and connections. Talk to your little friend. Better yet, let me talk to her.”

“Maria? You’re trying to use me to get to Maria? Or is it the Foundation?” Jonathan moved around the desk and took his seat. So that was it. Money. Power. Influence. She was vying for a handout. “I’ve told you in the past that the Foundation does not contribute to political campaigns. Charities, yes. Politics, no.”

“This is a charitable event! I told you…”

“No.” Vanessa’s eyes narrowed. It was an early sign. She was losing her control. “It is a venue for you to increase your public image, and yes, a charity might actually benefit, but the actual intent will be for your own personal gain.”

“And you never used anything in your life to gain power or set yourself up in a situation?” Jonathan refused to comment. “What about the Foundation? How has it aided you, Jonnie? I would say that it alone encompasses your very existence. You found it and you found Maria DeLuca. It altered your life.”

“To the better I’d say. What is your point, Van?” Jonathan looked at his watch again. “Make it and go. I’ve given you all the time I can spare from my busy day.”

Vanessa sat on the edge of his desk facing him. Her hand picked up a paper weight and she leaned forward to enter Jonathan’s personal space. “I’ve been thinking lately. A lot. About my dead husband, about my life, and surprisingly about you. Things that never made sense suddenly did, and with all I know now, I had to ask some important questions. Questions that I never entertained before, and suddenly there they are. Did you want to know what I discovered? What I came to believe?” Jonathan shook his head no. “I made a mistake leaving you. Congressman Whitaker was a dud. He was a quest for influence, but I miscalculated.”

“We’ve walked these grounds before, Van. We’re history. I have a life now. A life I’ve always wanted, dreamed of, and never thought I would ever find. It’s a gift. I can honestly say that I feel happy.”

“Happy? Do you really know what that means? I thought you seemed happy enough when we were together. When I was under you, and you were pounding into me. You were still occasionally fucking me even after I married the Congressman. What does that say about you?”

Jonathan laughed and pushed back his chair. Pushing her back on his desk, he moved closer as his arms trapped her. He moved close into her between her open thighs as he pushed her dress up a little to get better access. Moving over her, his mouth almost touching hers, he breathed a soft whispering voice in her mouth hearing her deep moan. “It says I am a man that doesn’t pass up a cheap and easy fuck. Sex is an easy commodity. Things that come easy are rarely valued. I owed the Congressman no loyalty. That was something you owed him.”

“We were good together.”

Jonathan’s eyes narrowed. “Is that what you want from me?” Jonathan let his mouth brush against hers swallowing her moan. “Thing is, Van. You have nothing I want. Nothing I need.” Jonathan straightened and stepped away from her. “I have work. Get out. I’ve told you no. And that is no to everything.”

Vanessa stood up in a huff, straightening her clothing. Her furious face was clouded, but suddenly it cleared and she smiled attractively and then deviously. “I know things. One thing I know for sure, Jonnie was that the sex between us was too good.” She reached up and left a lingering kiss on his unresponsive mouth. Shrugging she headed for the door, but paused when she saw Max standing there in the doorway watching the two of them. Jonathan saw him at the same time, and swallowing a sharp retort, he remained unflinching.

“Well, a voyeur! Who do we have here?” Vanessa advanced on Max, her eyes gleaming and greedy. “The boyfriend?”

Max didn’t spare Jonathan a glance. “No.” Jonathan didn’t move, but he held his breath. In just moments, Vanessa ruined everything. “The husband. Max Evans. And you would be?” Jonathan’s stiff body suddenly loosened and he looked away smiling to himself. Husband. Oh, this had to be good.

Vanessa too had noticed the title of husband. She looked Max over, and stood taller. On her heels she actually was taller than Max’s six feet. Her five foot eight inch frame was given so much more stature with those five inch heels. “Vanessa Stiller Whitaker. Congresswoman Vanessa Whitaker.”

Max ignored her including Jonathan’s last name with hers. “Ah, the ex-wife. Jonathan told me that you would visit us. I was expecting you for dinner.” Max put on his charming smile.

Vanessa smiled too, but like Max, her smile died in hard coldness of her eyes. “Oh, what you must have been thinking walking in on Jonnie and me just know.”

“What indeed. Here I thought Jonathan had fallen prey to a cheap office fling. I was thinking you looked too old and worn to be one of those young office groupies. Here I was, going to lecture him on his poor taste, and remind him to bring the morsel home. You know Jonathan is a very sharing man.”

Jonathan smothered a laugh at Max calling Vanessa old. Haggish. Waiting, but not long, Jonathan just swore when Vanessa remembered who she was.

“Silly boy. Of course Jonathan shares. Dinner? Tonight? Afraid I can’t, but how about this Saturday? I’ll have my social secretary call yours. You do have a person I can call?”

Max refused to let her snub him. “Absolutely. I have Jonathan, but no need to call, we can figure it out right now. Saturday would be fine.” Max looked over at Jonathan, who was in all things silent, but suspiciously looked a bit red in the face. “Jonathan, is Saturday a go for you?” Max emphasized Jonathan’s full name. His heart stopped in his chest when his partner turned his brilliant deep black eyes on him. Oh God…

“Saturday, at 7:30 would be fine.”

Vanessa left in a huff, slamming the door behind her. Max leaned back on the closed door, his hand discreetly jamming the lock. He and Jonathan stood staring at each other. Max examined the slight redness to Jonathan’s face, and despite the sexually intensity of his stare, Max sighed and gave quarter.

“Go ahead.” Jonathan collapsed backwards on the leather sofa in his office along the one wall. He couldn’t hold any longer. Falling to the side, he couldn’t stop the laughter that finally found release. Max watched him with a certain degree of dispassion, but a slight suspicion of a smile pulled at the side of his mouth. “Are you through yet?”

Jonathan nodded and burst out in another gale of laughter. Vanessa. Her face was priceless. Having him piss her off, and then Max, it was better than Christmas. “She is not going to take that well.”

“Fuck her.” Max’s hand moved over his face. “Oh, that’s right, you’ve already done that!” Jonathan stopped laughing. Uh oh.

“How long were you standing there?”

Max advanced in the room. “Oh, I imagine for most of it. I had come over to tell you that I was working a special task force assignment for hopefully only this week. It entails lots of after hours work. Didn’t expect to see the man that proposed to me last night backing a woman up on his desk looking like he was going to do her.”

“What it was…”

“I saw what it was!” Max came to stand over the lounging Jonathan. Leaning down he suddenly kissed the other man deeply, and passionately. “Thank you.”

Jonathan nodded, and his hands pulled Max down on the sofa with him. “Husband?” Max kissed him again. Him refusing Vanessa was one thing, but the points in his favor were the distinction he made between him and his ex. She had no problem cheating on her husband, but Jonathan refused to betray Max.

They both were resting on the sofa when Max finally said it. “You married that? What were you thinking?”

“Pussy?” Jonathan offered hopefully. “Maybe it was the ‘Jonnie, you are a machine, make me bark’, shit.” He really didn’t want to detail his relationship with Vanessa, the why for, the how, and definitely not the break up.

“You are a dog. Spare me the verbiage and oral histrionics.” Max laughed as Jonathan made a woofing sound. “You must have loved her, at least once. You aren’t the type of man to give away anything for nothing.”

Startling that he knew and saw that much. Jonathan’s hand nervously plucked at the front of his shirt. How honest to be? It was always a fine line between them. Every day they moved that line around, made adjustments, but nothing was without cost. Vanessa, his past, and even his failed marriage were all things he did not want touching Max. Things were different now. They were different. He was different.

“Love? No. Never.” Jonathan said softly. “She had something I needed at the time, and I was something she needed at the time. When she had no more need for me, I was history, and sad to say I was completely relieved.” Jonathan glanced at Max. “I’m not saying that she and I didn’t meet at some level, but it was never a love match. We satisfied each other physically and had something the other person wanted. At the time. It was never anything more than that.”

Max nodded. Who was he to judge? He had too many relationships, and most of them didn’t compliment him as a good man. Whatever transpired between Max and Vanessa in the past was over, and this was now. “Did you find out why she came, and I mean other than to check out your dipstick?”

“Oh, I’ve got a good guess, or let’s just call it a healthy suspicion.” Jonathan waved all discussion of Vanessa and her ambitions aside. “Forget that for now. Let’s discuss you being my husband.”

Max laughed. “Oh, you caught that.”

“Max...,” Jonathan warned.

“Fine. Yes, I called you that. So want to make something of it?”

Jonathan smirked and leaned back again. “No. Not a word. This will keep until later, and believe me, later…you will talk, Max.”

~~~

Liz was late. Maria watched as Michael paced up and down in front of the elevator. It was only ten minutes until eleven. They still had time. “Where the hell is she?” Michael growled. Maria giggled, delightedly. He looked like a large predatory cat stalking back and forth with his tail whipping around expressively. His gruff growl was just adding to the image.

“She’ll be here. Liz won’t let us down.” Maria turned and saw a windswept Liz Parker rushing into the building. “And here she is.”

Liz’s long brunette hair was tossed about her face and she was still wearing a white lab jacket. Sorry, I made an excuse at work, so they think I’m in the building doing something. I need to get back now.”

Maria kissed Liz on the cheek as she handed Michael the blood sample. The woman was distracted. “Thanks, Liz.” Maria’s frown increased. “What is it?” They hadn’t done much together since her illness, and since Liz and Isabel started hanging together as thick as thieves.

Liz smiled slightly. “Nothing. It’s nothing. I just…” Liz shook her head. “I was busy and then I thought I had the time wrong, so it was more a rush than it should’ve been.”

Maria smiled slightly. Something was wrong. “Come over tonight, okay? I’d love to talk, catch up and everything.” Liz nodded, but swore as she looked at her watch. Waving to them both, she was out the door.

“Tonight? You invited her tonight?”

“I think that was what I said. Hmmm, let me think.” Maria appeared to pause in thought as Michael jabbed impatiently at the elevator call button. “Yep, I think it was tonight. You know, t-o-n-i-g-h-t. Tonight it is.”

“Smart ass!” Michael continued abusing the elevator button.

“You know pushing the button repeatedly doesn’t make it come any faster.” Maria adored her irritated partner and husband. “And you love my ass.”

“Actually I worship your ass, and the pushing makes me feel better.”

“Oh, well that’s good. Push it some more!” Maria giggled as he scowled and they entered the elevator. She leaned into him whispering in his ear. “Oh, push it so hard. Oh yeah. Baby…”

“Maria, stop it or I will show you harder right here, right now, and you know DocJim asked us not to use the elevator for that.”

“Spoilsport.”

While they were waiting for DocJim, Michael was back to his imitation of the Lion King, pacing and pacing. The blood draw went off without a hitch. Maria knocked something over and while Carolyn was helping her, he switched the sample, quickly pocketing her other one. They were both apprehensive. The lack of that special hormone in her blood and her normal iron count was something they couldn’t explain. Both were afraid Jim would want to rerun the test.

“Maria. Michael.” The Doc smiled at them both when he came into the room. His smile increased in brilliance as he took in both of their appearances. “God, you two look healthy! Maria, you gained weight!”

“And this is a reason to celebrate?” Maria said sarcastically since historically women have preferred to lose weight rather than gain it.

“In this case, indeed it is.” DocJim took his stool and looked at the couple. “Let’s get the examination over first and we’ll talk. Michael, how was the honeymoon? Where did you go?”

Michael relaxed enough and told Jim all about the trip as Maria added in her two cents from time to time. DocJim chuckled at a few of the stories as he measured Maria’s stomach and quickly examined her.

“Are your breasts getting tender?” Michael just snorted. Damn straight they were!

“No remarks from you, buddy!” Maria lifted herself up and looked at Jim. “They are pretty sensitive. Actually I started not wearing my bra because the rubbing was bothering me.”

“Don’t. The extra support is important. I know it can get a little…tender, but try to keep the bra on, okay? Things are finally growing, and your body won’t be used to the extra weight. The bra will help.”

“So is this ‘tenderness’ going to get worse?”

DocJim shrugged. “Hard to say. For each woman it’s different. I would say yes, though if you’re already sensitive, then it could be a concern.”

Maria laid back and groaned. “Oh great! I almost jumped out of my skin this morning dressing. It was almost painful. Unexpected. Nothing like falling flat.”

“Oh, Maria, they aren’t that flat anymore! I actually think they look good.” Maria made a face at her husband whose newest and favorite pastime seemed to be describing how much he appreciated her pregnant body, especially her newfound cleavage. DocJim chuckled and studied the lab report.

“Everything is looking good! I have to admit that the honeymoon has caused a wonderful improvement in your health. Added weight. Better color. Even your blood chemistry is normal for the first time.” Jim frowned at the sheet. “The thing that concerns me is what’s missing. That special hormone is gone and your iron count is normal. I’d like to run some additional…”

“Jim,” Maria interrupted. “How important is that? I mean, you said that you thought it was something special from the babies because of Michael’s unusual blood type. Could it be that I no longer have it because they’re no longer making it?”

“Possible. Hard to say. It was always an anomaly. I think though that we should at least look at why…”

“Jim.” Maria sighed heavily. “Jim, I feel fine. Actually, I can honestly say that for the first time in a long time, I feel great! And if it isn’t too much to ask, I would love to stop being a blood donor. I am so sick of having my blood taken, and being pricked. If I’m normal, well great. Just note it on my chart, and next time I’m pregnant, we’ll have somewhere to start. Right?” Maria purposely avoided looking at Michael. She concentrated on DocJim, who was still wavering. “Please? Please. I just want to enjoy some parts of this pregnancy. I want…no, I need to feel normal.”

DocJim smiled slightly and patted her hand. He nodded, acknowledging that her pregnancy had been a heavy burden, full of a lot of stress. It was nice to actually have some relief from that. “Very well. I’ll recheck you at the next check up and if you remain normal, we can pull back on the lab work.” Maria smiled happily, and then she looked over at Michael. He needed to play his part, too. DocJim saw the look and followed her glance. “Michael, is that okay with you?”

Michael sat in silence, as if contemplating the discussion. “I want her healthy. Nothing else means more than that. Nothing is more important.”

“She is healthy, Michael.”

Michael looked at Maria. “If you’re sure. I just can’t take the hospital again.”

DocJim stood up. “I understand that. We’ve come a long way. Both of you have done an incredible job getting through the pregnancy. Maria is far enough along that if complications rise, we can safely take the babies. It shouldn’t be a large concern.”

Michael nodded. “Then whatever Maria wants is fine with me.” Michael smiled with a touch of his usual smirk. “She usually gets her way anyway.”

“I hear you.” DocJim punched Michael on the shoulder in companionship. He was married with a wife; he knew exactly what Michael was talking about. “Well, everything’s going as scheduled, so I shouldn’t need to see you two until the next appointment. You’ve got my card and you can call the office anytime with concerns if they should arise. Now there is one thing very wrong, and we are going to have to fix it immediately.” DocJim missed the flash of worry in a pair of communicating eyes. He picked up Maria’s left hand, tsking, “What the hell did you do to this cast?”

Maria laughed and looked over at Michael. “The warm British Virgin Isle waters wrecked it.”

“Didn’t they tell you not to get it wet?”

“I tried. I really did, but someone,” she looked over at her husband with a grin, “kept pulling me in the water before I could cover it, and there were a few impromptu skinnydipping times, add in the snorkeling, and…”

“I get the picture.” DocJim looked at the sad excuse for a cast. It was a lightweight one, and he was sure that most of the time Maria forgot about it, or chose to forget about it, because it reminded her of that terrible day they lost Mrs. Mulhoney. “Well, I’m sending you over to the hospital for x-rays and to have orthopedics recast this.” Jim stood up and wrote out a service request and x-ray order for them. “Michael, this time make sure she doesn’t get it wet.” Jim leaned closer and frowned at the decaying cast. “What is this?”

Maria looked down the stain on her cast, a soft blush ran up her cheeks and she reflexively hid them with her hands. “Tabasco sauce.” She stuck her tongue out at her husband when she heard his chuckle from his corner of the room.

Michael and Maria walked out of the building with a happier gait to their stride. Things were looking pretty good, and even though they were home, things still felt good. It was as if their world, which had been turned upside down, had finally righted itself. Or so one would believe. Or at least until Michael remembered that they were supposed to meet Amy for lunch at the much abused Palisades. Figured. She would pick the Palisades. His mother-in-law wasn’t one to balk in the face of crushing irony.

~~~

“This is stupid.”

The others ignored the angry pacing man. He flopped down on the junked sofa next to the blonde woman reading a magazine. She didn’t even bother to acknowledge him. He reached over and grabbed the magazine from her hands, looking at it quickly,  then tossed it over the sofa behind him.

“Hellooo!”

“Fawk off, Lonnie. This gig is a stitch. I’m bailin’.”

The silent man in the corner of the room didn’t even bother to look up. “Wassaup, Rath?”

“Nuthin! That is the frickin’ prob. Nuthin!” Rath got up and resumed pacing again in irritation, his jaw flexing in anger. Both eyebrows were pierced, along with his nose, and the tattoos on his arms seemed to come to life reflexively clenched and unclenched his hands. “Weeks. We been here weeks, yo Royal fuck. Whatta we gonna do? Sit in a damn sewer forevah?”

“Go ball Lonnie or som’em.”

Rath laughed in a loud cackling sound. “I ain’t fucking Lonnie. She’s a frickin carpet muncher. She’s been sucking on your cunt.”

Zan shrugged. That wasn’t all she’d been sucking on. So what? He was aware of that. Hard to miss with the extra body in his bed working over Ava every night, working over him. He wasn’t complaining. Actually he liked it. Two women, his bed, even if one of them was his sister. She was a talented cum catcher, not really caring much where the load came from.

Ava was on another sofa listening, but silent. There wasn’t much to say. She pushed strands of her colored blonde hair away from her face. She was the most abused of the four of them. They all used her as their personal whore. Even Rath, when he was in a mood. He wasn’t very nice about it either. He liked to slap her around when the others were busy. Lonnie was the worst. There was a cold calculation that came in her eyes, and she knew that Lonnie liked doing her and having her return the favor in front of the guys. Lonnie hurt. She bit. Her nipples. Her clit. It hurt. It turned the guys on, got them hot. Lonnie liked the power of that. It was only in the last three years that Lonnie seemed to find a fascination for Zan, her brother.

Zan. Ava glanced over at her husband. They had gotten married over ten years ago. Not that it mattered. He only did it to pacify her. Over twelve years ago they discovered they weren’t the real Royals, that Zan wasn’t the King. An interstellar conference had been held, where they were supposed to be the Royals, the keepers of the Granilith. It had mysterious been transported from Antar after the Royals came out of their incubation chambers. No one knew that would happen. The genetic matrix inside the Granilith had sought its counterparts, and the moment the Commander was born, it transported itself to Earth, to an unknown location, homing in on the Commander’s new hybrid DNA. All these years, the Antarians along with all the other planets in their system had been in a mad dash to rediscover it and return it to their solar system.

Zan hadn’t had the crest imprinted on his brain. And all these years later none of them could reproduce. They were sterile. Mules. Hybrid mixes with the wrong genetic mix - too much alien and not enough human. They couldn’t live comfortably on this planet except in areas high in certain gases, such as those found within sewers. Outside too long, they found it hard to breathe. It was ironic and pathetically fitting. They were the rejects, the leftovers…garbage. It was an added insult to be forced to live in the sewers. Their bodies were more attuned to live on Antar with minor problems from their human DNA. Antar. Home. If only they could find a way back to the place that had exiled them long ago.

Zan looked at his wife. “What?” Ava just shook her head, and stood. She quietly exited the cavern that was part of the Roswell sewage system. Lonnie and Zan shared a look, as Rath kicked something in anger. He was full of anger and rage, both of which had increased the moment he had seen his dupe, the Commander, and the Commander’s mate. There was an ugliness to his face, an apparent spite and hate. Without stopping, he slammed out of the cavern too.

“That went well.” Lonnie said sarcastically. Going to her brother, she pushed him back in the chair and mounted him, leaning into his body. “He’s outta control. I don’t think we’re going to hold him contained much longer. He saw the Commander’s bitch, and he started dreamin’ of her.”

“How ya know?”

Lonnie smiled bitterly. “Dreamwalked his punk ass. Bastard was playing happy ever after with the bitch in his dreams. Fuckin’ her hard, long, and often. Non-stop. He was a machine. He wants to rip the babies out of her cunt with his bare hands. Wassup with dat?” Zan shook his head and leaned back, moving her body down a little so he could loosen his pants.

“I’d feed him Ava, but he shanked her good last time. Ripped her apart. Took me a while to fix her up.”

“That was afta he dreamt of the Commander’s fish. He laid into Ava, paddled her ass red then fucked her up it.” Lonnie slid down Zan’s cock taking it in deep in one slide. “I watched. It got me off.”

Zan kissed her hard. “Yo, Lon, you’re one sick cum-sucking bitcha.” He removed her top. “Howzit comin’ with the trout-biter Skin, Nicolas?”

Lonnie laughed evilly even as her breathing quickened. “He’s a greasy clit-sucking man. He was shadowing my dupe. Isabel. What a dud. Her boy, Alex is a dark honey, though. I like. I could see myself going down on Opie. Just lookin’ at the man gets me juicy in the Y.”

“Don’t fuck with the plan. We follow the Royals, find the Granilith, then we take their places.” Zan grunted as she sped up a little. “No fuckin’ up. Yo?”

“Word. I want off this loser planet.” Lonnie pushed her hands through his hair pulling it hard. “The other two, they’re becomin’ a problem. We might have to remove them from the scene.”

Zan just shrugged. He wouldn’t mind having his whiny wife fried. And Rath. The punk was so fugly and whacked it was just a matter of time before the Skins or Walkers trashed his ass. The sooner, the better. He was out of control, raping and killing all around the Roswell area every night. He just killed a family of three the other night. Raped the entire family and then flayed them alive, leaving their entrails smeared on the wall.

Yes, Rath was a problem. All the violent tendencies of a warrior were inside him, boiling and demanding release. He had no patience and no morals. All he wanted was to kill and maim. Max,  the King, his dupe,  was doing a man. Who thought such a cunt boy would turn into a puffer? Zan laughed as he used his powers and slammed Lonnie off his dick, pushing her several feet into a concrete wall. Standing, he easily dropped his pants and went over and picked Lonnie up by her hair, forcing her to look at him.

“Do what you do best.” He forced her mouth open and shoved himself inside, taking no care whether she could handle it or not. Talking about killing his wife and Rath really got his engines revving. Wonder where his nipply bitch of a wife was. Laughing, he grunted hard, pounding into Lonnie’s throat. He was surprised that the King was once a paperboy, doing all the free pussy in Roswell,  to then turn into a pillowbiter. No matter. He saw the train the boy was pulling and there was nothing growin’ off that slab of prime meat. Zan would happily slap that ass too.

~~~

She was home again.

Ava watched as Tess took a few of her packages out of her car, and went into her house. It was a nice place. Beautiful. She lived there with her adorable, loving husband, her stomach fat and heavy with the King’s baby. Taking her usual place to watch, Ava hugged her legs as she sipped on a coffee. Her normal appearance was altered. The piercings were taken out, and she had changed her hair to a soft curling blonde minus the color streaks. Her clothes were the Queen’s. She had entered the house and tried on all of Tess’s clothes while she was away. Last night, she had hid in the house, and through a half-open closet door, she watched them make love.

That had been a mistake. What they did and how they did it was something beyond anything she had ever known or seen. There was a passion, mixed with honest gentleness and love. The ache started in her stomach and spread between her legs, residing in her empty worthless womb. Love. She would never feel love. She could only live vicariously through them. That was all she had.

It was easy. She mindwarped them into not seeing her. So easy. It wasn’t like anyone ever noticed her anyway. Not unless they wanted to abuse or use her. Tess’s life versus hers. No contest. It was tempting to approach the husband, Kyle and see if he would notice the difference, if he could love her too. The man was beautiful. She watched him sleep. There was a gentleness to his face. A kindness, with a touch of wicked humor and fun. They laughed. A lot. Showered together, and in the evening when he got home, they went on long walks. A dog. They were talking about getting a dog, a puppy for the baby.

The baby was going to be Jack, but they had offered to let the King chose the name. He was thinking of Philip or Steven. Ava closed her eyes. She would’ve named him Zan. The King. She watched him too, but he seemed to sense her near, so she backed off. He was in love. Just like on Antar. He had had a lover there too. Someone he shared himself with, someone that could touch him in places he wouldn’t let her near. Even in that life, she was just something to use. Now she was even less. How cruel was that?

God, she wanted to be Tess.

~~~

“Can we stop to see the kids?”

Michael looked over at Maria and nodded. It was late afternoon. She was tired. He could see it in her face, but for once it wasn’t a bad tiredness. They had had a long outing between the doctor’s office visit and meeting Amy for lunch. Lunch had run into a late tea with dessert as Maria showed her mom all the honeymoon pictures that were developed so far, gave her the presents they bought for Amy and Jim, and they sat back and told her tales of what they had done on the trip.

On Michael’s way out of the restaurant, Amy grabbed him and kissed him right on the mouth, then hugged him tight. It was her way of thanking him for keeping her daughter safe, making her happy and healthy. It took at least four blocks before he could speak and another two for the redness on his neck to leech away. Amy. He…she was…he couldn’t say. She was Amy. His mom.

“Yeah, let’s stop and see our kids.”

Maria made a happy sound in her throat and sat back enjoying the sunshine. Michael smiled slightly to himself when she softly hummed to herself and the babies. He had caught her this morning giving them a talk about sandbox etiquette. Interesting woman he married.

Margo opened the door to Zeke’s loft wearing a long baseball shirt. Michael immediately recognized it as being one of Zeke’s. She had a smudge of charcoal on her face, and her hands were black. Maria noticed a slight pink blush running up Margo’s neck as she seemed uncertain whether to invite them in or not.

“Hi. Remember us?” Maria said gently. Suddenly Margo was hugging them both hard. She pulled them backwards into the loft which was…Maria looked around. Damn. A mess. Margo’s paintings were everywhere, cluttering up both the bottom area and the upper stairs leading to the loft. Margo was set up to work downstairs, and Zeke had opened all the upper blinds to let the light in and pushed all the living room furniture to the walls to open the space.

It was Zeke that made both Michael and Maria stop in their tracks. He was lying on a lounging sofa fast asleep. Nude. Maria’s eyebrow went up, and her hand went to her mouth as she breathed out the words, ‘Oh my...’ Michael quickly put his hand over her eyes and turned her around. A mother shouldn’t check out her young son’s…um....jewels.

Maria made a sound as her eyes found the charcoal drawings that Margo had been working on. She practically fell to her knees. They were all of Zeke. Nude. Asleep. Beautiful. His dark curling hair was wild and unkempt around his head, and the soft long down of his eyelashes graced his prominent cheekbones. His mouth was slightly open as he breathed and there was a peppering of whiskers on his youthful unshaven face.

“Margo!” Maria flipped through a few, and then standing she looked at the ones against the wall. They were magnificent. Inspired. Violent. Brilliant and stark. Honest. They showed youth and power, with a touch of innocence barely held in check. A coming of age in a world of pain.

“What?” Zeke came awake slowly to find three set of eyes on him. Recognizing both Michael and Maria, his face lit with a smile until suddenly he remembered his state of undress. “Oh, shit!”

Margo calmly took a small washcloth and placed it strategically over his...um…nether regions. And Maria tossed Margo a towel.

“I don’t think that’s going to cut it. Try this.”

Michael took the towel from Margo and turned to face the two women, putting himself between them and Zeke who had sat up. Looking back at the young man, Michael looked at his watch and then scowled.

“Aren’t you supposed to be in school right now?”

Zeke rubbed his neck, looking more than a little embarrassed. “What it is, was…”

“Uh huh.” Michael turned back to the two women. Tossing the towel to Zeke. “Put that on! You,” pointing to Margo, “go put on some more clothes, and you,” pointing to Maria, “go sit in the corner and behave yourself.”

Michael finally gave up trying to get control, so he took a half-dressed Zeke with him to pick up pizza, leaving Maria alone to talk to Margo. The younger man was literally bouncing in the seat next to him fiddling with the stereo. CCR. Yeah, Bad Moon was rising, all right. Michael calmly reached over and pushed in his Metallica CD cutting off the irritating radio stations.

“Man, that was a classic!”

Michael shrugged. “This is a classic.”

“Michael, man, I have to tell you that your love of Metallica is becoming an obsession. There is a world of classic rock you should check out! CCR, Sly and the Family Stone, Three Dog Night, and…”

“I like classic rock.” Michael said in irritation. “I have some classic stuff. Everything by Buddy Holly.”

“Oh, the King!” Zeke was moving to the song. “Man, my friend, Sal tried to talk me out of my collector’s Elvis Costello and Cream.”

“Bastard.”

“I’m sayin’...”

Michael discreetly looked over at the boy. “You gonna tell me what the hell is going on?”

Zeke scratched his eyebrow in a surprisingly similar gesture that Michael tended to do, and then shrugged.

 “Zeke...” Michael said in warning. He wasn’t going to back off.

“Nothing is going on.”

“You weren’t in school. How many days have you missed since we’ve been gone?”

“Um…” He did it again. He scratched his brow. Michael’s eyes narrowed as he turned into Maggiano’s. “Not that many.”

“How many?”

“Six.”

Michael turned off the car and got out slamming the door hard. “Six? Six is more than half the days you were supposed to be in school while we were gone. Correction, eleven school days, so that means you missed more than half of them!”

“Half. One of them was Labor Day.” At Michael’s angry growl, Zeke decided that maybe it wasn’t the best thing to say. “Look, I had to stay home. Margo…”

“We’re going to get to that too!”

“Man, it’s not what it looks like.”

Michael growled his name at the man at the counter. Turning back to Zeke, he put his hands on his hips. “What it looks like is you are posing nude for her, and she is walking around the place wearing nothing but one of your small thin shirts. What it looks like is that you two are intimate.”

“Intimate?” A frown marred the younger man’s face, but suddenly cleared. “No! Man...God...No! I mean, yes….I would...but no.” Zeke lowered his voice when people looked over at them. “I’m not sleeping with her.” He stopped and swore. “I am, but I’m not. You know?”

“No, I don’t know. Explain it to me.”

Zeke sighed and ran his hands through his unruly long hair, the curls looking even more in a disarray. “She…after you left, she couldn’t...man....” Michael’s fist clenched into fist, but suddenly loosened as Zeke continued. “She couldn’t paint. Almost an entire week. She rattled around the place. Not talking. Not eating. She spent two days sitting in a dark closet. I…I didn’t know what to do. She wouldn’t talk to me. I think it was the painting. She uses it. It gives her a purpose, an outlet to her nightmares, and she couldn’t paint, so…”

“They came back.”

Zeke nodded. “Bad.” He rubbed his face and leaned back against the wall that Michael was facing, the two men sharing a look. “I…Man, I needed you. I really did.” Michael reached out a hand and cupped the back of the boy’s neck. “She…I never saw anyone awake in a silent scream before. It was the fire. Mrs. Mulhoney. The terror. I don’t know. So many things. She dreams.”

“Like you?” Michael asked quietly. Zeke’s dreams. They never really talked about them. He rarely mentioned them.

“Nah. Different. Mine are like flashes of too many images, like a really bad music video. It is always the feeling that comes with them that means more. Hers...I think they were the same bad scene over and over. A memory. The day she bit her tongue.”

“Jesus!” Michael rocked on his feet looking up at the ceiling. “Sean. You should’ve called Sean.”

Zeke laughed. “I thought of that, but man, Sean had his own problems. The Boo was a holy terror getting it on with the white Fluff. The man was ragged, and then he got called out on three brutal murders. I couldn’t.”

“So what happened? What did you do?”

“I had a dream. I dreamt her hand were touching me.” Michael stared sharply at Zeke. “It felt fucking real, intense, and something more. I couldn’t say what it was, but I woke up and she was on the end of the bed watching me sleep.” Zeke’s face took on a slight blush look. “I got up and picked up her tablet of paper and a pencil. I asked her to draw me.”

“So how did you get nude? Did she ask you to…”

Zeke laughed. “No. Man, I sleep that way, so when I went to get her tablet, I was already in the skin, and I laid down that way. I was going to cover up, but she stopped me.” Zeke ran an embarrassed hand over his neck. “I must have fallen asleep again and she just kept drawing, then painting. Later I made her eat. We went downstairs, and I put fruit next to her easel, and posed on the lounging sofa reading. It was surprisingly easy after a while. At first it was hard because, truthfully, having her look at me really turned me on. That was kind of embarrassing.”

“You stayed home from school. Why?” Michael had a hand on his stomach. It felt hollow inside knowing he had left them alone, even for a few days. His charges. His responsibility.

Zeke paused as a man from the counter called Michael’s name. Michael quickly paid the money and shoved the three boxes of pizza at Zeke while he collected the bread and salads to go. They were in the car, but Michael didn’t start it immediately. He waited.

“I couldn’t leave her alone. I think Margo is alone too much. In her loft, all those years avoiding contact and people. I…I couldn’t stand to leave her alone again, so I stayed home.”

Michael was quiet for a moment. “Is that all there is to it? You aren’t sleeping with her - and I do mean in a sexual way?”

Zeke looked out the side window for a moment. “There is more to it. No, we aren’t doing it, if that’s important, but we’re not that innocent about it either.” Michael confusion was obvious. “She touches me. Rearranges my poses, moves my body, and at first that was all it was. Then I woke up one night with her curled up next to me. She didn’t know I was awake so I pretended to be asleep. She was touching me. Not really sexual, but…and she was talking to me in a low whisper, telling me things as her hand moved along my skin. Her life, dreams, fears, and stuff. I think she’s been alone for so long, and never had anyone to talk to, not really, and because she didn’t think I could really hear, she told me things. Things only she knows.” Zeke closed his eyes for a moment, but Michael saw the tears the young man was trying to keep hidden. “I don’t want to lose this, Michael. I need to be here for her.”

Michael started the car, but he sat there with his hands on the wheel. “Touchstone. You’re her touchstone.” Michael rubbed his forehead. Just like Maria was his. She was the marker in his life upon which all others were measured; she was the ideal. “There is an age problem here, Zeke.”

“Man, don’t tell me I’m too young to feel this way, to want this! I know she’s almost five years older than I am, but I’ve never been touched like this. I…I need it. I want it, and…”

“Zeke. You’ve got it wrong. It’s not you that is too young for Margo. She’s too young for you.” Zeke went quiet as Michael pulled out of the drive heading home.

~~~

“Maria, I can’t talk about it.”

“It or Zeke?” Maria watched the redness move up the younger woman’s neck. “Margo, you’re a beautiful woman. In quietness there is a strength, and your beauty is undeniable. But, we’ve talked about this before, and it’s still the same; you have to take the steps to go on. I can’t let Zeke be that for you. I’m sorry.”

“He helps me. He saved my life.”

“It’s not enough.” Maria sat on the sofa and patted the spot next to her. “Zeke, he’s a baby in age, but inside he is so much older. Life has already sown a tough gristle to his bones. Abuse does that sometimes. He is like a wild animal taught to fear, and he remains always on guard. Even around those that love him, like Michael and me…even you. It’s his nature. The boy peeks through, but the man is there. Always there.”

“He has a gentleness.”

“He does.” Maria sighed at the young woman. “For Zeke there can be only one love. No more. He has a large heart capable of immeasurable love, but those walls around it are high and strong. There is only room for one person. One. That person will need to be strong on their own before they enter that fortress, because if they ever leave there is no way back in again, and he’ll be alone.”

“He would learn not to trust…”

“Love.” Maria scooted closer to Margo. “He already has reasons to believe that it doesn’t exist. It has taken us this long to teach him otherwise, to give him a sense of family, but the woman he one day loves forever will be the final part of his healing. That woman would have to be very strong, very mature, and very vulnerable to him.”

Margo sighed and put her head in her hands. “I’m not ready for this.”

“No.” Maria held Margo close to her stroking her brilliant red hair in comfort. “You fear death and life…living. Zeke walks with death as a friend, a companion. In his young life, death was a constant possibility, and he firmly accepted its existence as the shadow on his back. He fears love more than he fears death, or even life. There is a part of him that is worn and used, old. He waits for it to betray him again, because in his young life that’s how it’s always been.”

“I love him.”

“I know.”

Margo laughed in pain. “I can’t have him.”

“No. Not as it is. Zeke needs to walk among the living. It’s part of how he learned to survive and stay strong. Everything in him will want to give way and follow you into this fortress of solitude you live in, just so you won’t be alone. Because it’s easier for him to give than to receive. I can’t let that happen. It would cheat both of you. You would be living half lives, not the full whole ones you deserve.” Maria hugged the younger woman as she softly cried. “I’m so sorry, my little Margo, but Zeke you can’t have. Not unless and until you learn to walk in the light, among the living.”

Margo stood up, her lean back to Maria, long and straight. Maria brushed away a tear as she watched the younger woman run her fingers over a picture of Zeke. Charcoal on paper was a poor substitute for flesh and blood.

There was a glimmer of hope here. Part of living was learning the limits, the possibilities and accepting what could be lived with, and lived without. It was in that moment of understanding that important decisions were made, that courage was forged, and a will bent to meet a challenge. It was all in Margo’s hands. She was at her personal crossroads, given the choice between remaining cloistered in her existence alone, or breaking free of that fifteen-year-old child afraid and lost in herself. No one said that growing up was painless. For some it was hardly a stretch, and for others it was more painful than birth.

~~~

Michael was glad to be home. He shut the door, and effectively the world outside, hugging Maria close to his side. They hadn’t talked about it, but they would. Later. It was hard to avoid the topic, but neither of them wanted to admit how hard it was to see their adopted children struggling and on the verge of leaving home.

“The twins,” Michael said, “ will live at home until they finish college. No dating until after eighteen, and no sleepovers.”

Maria pushed Michael away, glaring at him. “Damn you, Michael Guerin! You’re going to force me to give you another baby someday just to take the pressure off the twins. I wasn’t planning on that.”

Maria turned to walk away in anger, when he grabbed the back of her dress and pulled her back to him. “Whoa there, Professor! Are we talking more babies?”

Maria smiled slightly with him hugging her from behind, wrapped around her like a large bear. “Maybe, a few years down the line, and depending how this time goes.”

Michael didn’t know what to say. He thought this one pregnancy would be it. Their only one. Maria had such a hard time, and he couldn’t imagine either of them going through this again. As always, he forgot to figure in the DeLuca factor, which was a sharp right turn north of reality seen through rose-colored glass. Slighted skewed. Damn her sassy ass. She did it again. Maria DeLuca Guerin just left him speechless.

More babies. Even just one more. Michael closed his eyes. He never thought or imagined it to be a possibility, but suddenly it was. Everything inside him wanted to get busy immediately making them. Maria must have read his mind because she laughed.

“Hold on, Chief! Let’s push out these two first, then we’ll talk about it.”

Michael turned her around and slowly backed her up, his predator mode coming on full throttle. “Did I tell you that I loved you today?”

“Three this morning. Again at six. Before the doctor’s appointment. A quickie at the restaurant, and yes, my mom figured that out! And…”

“I knew it. I’ve been neglecting you,” Michael said with great exaggeration, and Maria playfully alluded his pounce. Before she could let him catch her, there was a knock at the glass door. Liz. Maria actually swore making Michael’s eyebrow raise in amusement. She had forgotten about Liz.

“Aw! Parker beast.” Michael loped off towards the stairs.

“Where are you going?”

“Bath. You invited her, so you get to take care of her. I’m going to take a bath, then watch television in the bedroom.”

Maria grumbled on her way to the door, but pausing she looked up at her mate before he disappeared. “Michael, do me a favor?” She smiled charmingly as he looked down at her and waited. “Go back to work tomorrow.”

Michael looked thoughtful and leaned on the railing. “Why? Sick of me, Professor?”

“Hardly. But you miss it. I don’t need feedings any longer, just that sexy amount of blood you give up during sex,” Maria cleared her throat when his eyes got heavy with sexual intensity. “The construction team comes tomorrow to start expanding the loft, and I know you hate the mess and extra bodies, so…”

“They really need me at work.” Michael said sagely. They had agreed on the construction, and having it done before the babies were born, but he forgot it was happening so soon. But on the plus side, those construction guys usually came with really cool nail guns and tools. “I can’t leave you alone with a house full of strangers.”

“Hardly strangers. It’s Stan’s company. He did most of the work on the museum. I know his entire crew. I’ll be fine. I was planning on going back to work at the museum for half days three days a week anyway, now that I feel better.”

Michael started to protest but he instead nodded his head. Work and being busy would make time go faster until the babies came. Sitting at home made it seem interminably long. “Deal, but all the rules apply about calling me, checking in, no going anywhere unless….”

Maria laughed and went to open the door for Liz. “Nag. Nag. Nag.”

“Pardon me?”

“Hi, Liz. Just talking to Michael.” Maria looked upstairs and her husband had quickly made himself scarce. “Come on in.”

Maria went to make them some tea as she and Liz talked about the honeymoon and other things. It had been months and months since they really had a chance to talk about anything but her health and the babies, or alien stuff.

“Where is Isabel?”

“Alex.”

“This is getting serious.”

Liz nodded. “It really is. They should just move in together, or get married.”

Maria sat down and laced her tea with extra sugar. “Wow. I mean I noticed the joined at the hip thing, and it was hard not to notice them at the wedding dancing only with each other. I just thought they would take it slower.”

“I did too. Not that I mind. I can handle the rent on the loft by myself, easily. It’s just I was expecting to share it with Iz at least until she graduated.” Liz was quiet.

Maria frowned at the young woman. There were so many conflicting vibes about her. At times Liz Parker came off confident and bold, almost arrogant in her abilities and knowledge, then suddenly she was Liz Parker, the small brown mouse, scurrying to hide in the shadows. There was a dichotomy to her that was intriguing at times, but also confusing. Would the real Liz Parker stand up? Maybe even Liz was unsure who that was.

“So what’s going on with you, Liz? We’ve hardly talked since that time when we went to the movies and talked about Sean and Prince Charming. How are you, Princess?”

Liz ran her finger over the table. It was true. She was in their lives, but her role was a very established one. She helped them. She wasn’t really family. Not really. Everyone else had a connection to the group in some way, but she was more the outsider looking in. They made her feel she belonged, but it was one thing to be made to feel that way and another thing to actually be that way. She didn’t. Not really.

“I’ve been a little messed up lately, Maria.” Seeing Maria’s concern, Liz quickly smiled. “Men. Lots of men. At first it was just dating. It became more. Isabel is concerned that I’m as addicted to sex as she once was, that I am walking a fine line on the edge.”

“What do you think?”

Liz closed her eyes and blew her breath out hard. “It was confusing. First, I think it was the sensation, the relief of living, being alive. After Sean, I was uncertain about myself. I wanted more, wanted to be more, to feel more and actually live. Perhaps the choices I made were a little reactionary to being dumped by Sean.” Liz laughed. “Isabel figured it out for me I think, or actually it was your mother.”

“I don’t understand.”

“The pheromone thing you and Michael have going. It is very…stimulating.”

Maria sat back in wonder, the disbelief apparent on her face. “Are you saying that we made you horny?”

Liz laughed and buried her head in her folded arms in embarrassment. “Oh, there is definitely that! God, I never felt anything like it before, and it was…good. Intense.” Liz looked at Maria. “Sometimes I hate my body, hate the feelings inside it. I feel a stranger to myself most the time.” Liz’s hand ran through her long brunette hair. “Once, when I had my career goals in mind there was this clarity. I knew what I was doing and where I was going. No doubts. No conflicting emotions. Direct. Focused. Understood. Now…” Liz shrugged.

“What?” Maria tried to quell the sense of panic from her throat. “Now what, Liz?”

Liz leaned back and laughed bitterly. “Now I know I’m in love.” Staring at Maria again, she was deadly serious. “And it’s not good, Maria. Not good at all.”

God, don’t say it. Maria stood up and backed up a little. She didn’t want to know this. There was no hope here. No place for Liz. “Liz, please, don’t you think that maybe you could be wrong? I mean, you barely know him, and…”

“Don’t you think I know that?” Liz laughed bitterly. “At first, all my thoughts were on Sean. Completely on him. I regretted our break up. Hated it. Hated him. Loved him at the same time. There was this rage and anger, and I really didn’t know where it came from. First, I thought it was for him. Then me. But I redirected it to other places. That was okay. Other men. Trying to build a life helped to keep it under control, to refocus.”

Maria winced. “I’m sorry, Chica. Really I am. But you seemed okay with it. You and Sean, you’re still friends.”

“We are. Like I said, I found a focus, a place to go with it and it made it easier.” Liz looked at her hands. “Can I confess something?” Maria wanted to say no, but she started it, so there were few options. “I was in love with you.” Maria’s eye glanced upstairs, and she saw a startled Michael at the top of the stairs. Quickly motioning him, back she turned back and listened to Liz with great sympathy.

“Liz, I can’t…”

“God! I know that! And I thought for a while that it was what was common to both you and Sean that attracted me to him. I knew there was no hope for me, because I never met a woman who was more heterosexual than you. I mean, my God! Michael Guerin’s mate. I was fascinated. Awed. Against my will, Maria, I was utterly entranced by you. But I learned to put that away. Stifle it and really look at it for what it was. Envying a person, wanting to be them, or even to bask in their warmth couldn’t be love, right?” Maria didn’t know what to say, so she said nothing. “Then I met him. It was so hard at first because I didn’t know what attracted me the most, him or you. He is like you in so many ways. Similar. Different. There is a richness in his tone. A clarity and honesty. Even when you know he isn’t being completely truthful, you know that he is someone to trust. Someone what will protect.”

“Liz…”

Liz held up a hand. “No. It’s okay. I seem destined to love unattainable people. Those beyond my reach. People who are completely wrong for me, or direct opposites. It’s a tragedy. I’m learning to be satisfied with just knowing him, and seeing him occasionally. That’s enough.” Liz twisted her fingers together. “I really think there was someone out there just for Liz Parker. A soulmate…that perfect union of heart and soul. All things being as they are, time looped back on itself and an opportunity was lost. Now I’m in love with a man that doesn’t know I exist, and I’m angry at another one that replaced me immediately. So hard, Maria. It is so hard not being enough.”

Maria felt sick. She felt totally sick in her heart for Liz. The small creature, so tiny and defenseless, yet brilliantly smart and completely honorable. “I thought you were dating Eddie.”

“I am. I was.” Liz moved her finger along the counter of the kitchen bar tracing the grain of the wood. “And he’s great. I love that there is this intensity about him. I think I could really develop real feelings for him, if I let myself.” Liz pushed her long hair away from her face and behind her shoulder. “I guess I’m afraid. What if he’s another man or person who is just out of my reach? I hate the feelings it creates in me. I would rather feel nothing than feel this way.”

“This man…..the one you love. Are you sure he is completely beyond you?”

Liz nodded. “Definitely. He is very married to his mate. Completely. Hard to miss that type of devotion. It’s timeless.”

Maria shut her eyes for a moment and prayed she wouldn’t say Michael’s name. She had suspected Liz’s feeling for herself, but not Michael too. Oh, please...

Liz put her head down on the counter and hit it with the palm of her hand. “I wish I never met Jonathan Stiller.”

~~~

“It’s official. She is totally whacked.”

“Michael, please!”

Michael sighed and then nodded reluctantly. Maria didn’t want to talk about it any longer. It wasn’t every day that you discover that someone like Liz Parker has been hiding feelings for your wife, your wife’s cousin, and your partner’s gay lover. Unreal.

“You know what? I think I need to order a pizza.” Food. It was a panacea for what ailed a person.

Maria rolled over and looked at Michael to see if he was serious. “Extra cheese and mushroom?” Michael nodded. Maria smiled sitting up and leaning on him as he reached for the phone. “I can eat.”