Author: becky rttavi@aol.com
Rating: G
Pairing: M/M
Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with Roswell or the characters of Roswell.
Spoilers: Behind the Music & anything since probably
Improv #11 Forgive--Petal--Fog--Savor


~*~

I think he called me Buttercup.

I wasn't expecting that exact word to come from his mouth. Ever. But there we were outside on the blanket lying on our backs waiting for a meteor shower to begin; he touched his finger to my lips and I swear I heard him say: 'I love you Buttercup.'

Not Honey or Sweetheart, but Buttercup.

It's a word that I didn't think Michael even knew what it meant, a flower, I think, or maybe a butterfly, but I never imagined in a million years he'd call me that.

Through all the years that I'm managed to forgive, he's never called me that. Forget? No, but forgive, yes. I've been called every other pet name in the world, but tonight he surprised me with Buttercup.

I was lying there with my head on his chest, his strong protective arms wrapped around me as if I was his last salvation. Maybe I am his last salvation. Maybe I am the one who keeps him human. Maybe he does need me in his life to keep him grounded.

I needed him too when I thought I didn't. That took awhile for me to understand; that somewhere on my own journey of self-discovery I realized what made me, well, me. It was partly him. Without Michael in my life I wasn't quite complete. Some people say that you don't know what you've got until it's gone, they are so right.

When he touched my lips, his fingertip as soft as a petal on a newly opened flower, and called me Buttercup, I knew why I loved him so much. There would only be one person for me and that one person was Michael.

I looked at him and smiled. I was his Buttercup.

~*~

I think I called her Buttercup.

I have no idea where that word came from, it just slipped out when I was telling her I loved her like I do all the time. Most of the time. We're lying next to each other, my arms around her acting like a sieve of her compassion. And then it slipped out: 'I love you Buttercup."

Not Honey or Sweetheart, but Buttercup.

I don't even know what Buttercup means. I think it might be candy or a desert of some kind. Either way it wasn't something that I ever thought I'd call anyone. Ever.

Of the years we've been together, they've never been easy. We've never made it easy on each other. But tonight, I feel like my world has changed, tonight I know that each sin will be forgiven and each fault overlooked.

Sometimes I take for granted the ones who mean the most to me, maybe most people do. It's easy to lash out at the ones you love. Then she was gone and I was truly alone in a self-induced mental fog. Now, as she lay in my arms, I'm never letting her go.

I realized not so long ago that she needs me as much as I need her. We're two souls that are meant to be wrapped up swirling in the other. She's as much a part of me as I am of her. Without the other one, we just kind of drift in the night bumping into things. Together, I think we just might be invincible.

When I'm with her, I am human. A specialized human, but human none the less. In a way, she's my salvation.

When I touched her lip with my finger, I let it linger and tried to savor every second of intimate connection I had with her. I told her I loved her and she was my Buttercup and I knew why I loved her so much. There was only person for me and that person is Maria.

She looked at me and smiled. She is my Buttercup.


~end~