Author: Icalynn
E-mail:Icalynn26@yahoo.com
Rating: PG-13
Category: M/T
Spoilers: Departure
Summery: Max chooses between his dreams and his reality. Set 3 years after Departure. Disclaimer: I don't own anything, don't sue.
Author's note: I had a dream... that's all you need to know. Okay, I wrote this at work... I hope someone likes it.

The day breaks as the sun's rays touch the tip of the Earth's crust. The bright hues awaken the darkened sky as the sky slowly brightens into the early spring morning.

The light trickles softly in through the window awakening the dreamers within. He feels the warmth of the morning sun fall upon his face. He turns away, not wanting to break from his dreams.

He finally stops fighting the primal urge to get up and awakens into his reality. He moans softly as his dreams flutter away.

He opens his eyes and looks over at his wife. He sighs softly as he watches her take in each breath, her chest falls and rises with the rhythm of life.

He knows his life with her is a lie, he knows that each kiss betrays his true feelings, he knows that he would give his life in order to have her back.

He pulls himself out of bed, dreading the day ahead. The only thing that keeps him alive is the fact that he knows that he can see her when he sleeps.

He looks into the mirror and stares at his reflection. His reflection shows his true appearance, the one he tries to hide from her, the one that shows he is in love with another.

He turns back and studies her. His thoughts race at the possibility of telling her the truth. He longs to tell her that he doesn't love her as she thinks he does.

She can feel him looking at her. His stare penetrates her thoughts. She knows he is hiding something from her, he has been hiding from her for last three years.

She keeps her eyes closed and pretends to sleep. It is all part of their morning routine.

He looks back at the mirror and touches his lips. He could still feel the burning sensation lingering on his lips. His passion begins to soar as he recalls his latest dream. He closes eyes and almost moans her name.

He knows that his dream world can not exist. He knows that this is not the life he intended. He never considered the fact that his first love, would not be his true love.

He remembers the first night they shared together. It stands alone as the best moment of his life. Even if at the time, he did not know it.

He remembers when his true love betrayed him. His feelings of betrayal brought him back into her arms. Now he was married to her, his first love in this lifetime.

Everyday he remembers his past a little more. Everyday his love increases for her. Every night she comes to him in his dreams. It is the only time and the only place that they can be together, since she is more than a galaxy away.

Some nights she brings their son and some nights she just comes by herself. He lives his life in their dreams.

Her powers are stronger on Antar, she is able to dreamwalk from afar. He knows it takes a lot out of her, he knows that she would die for him. After all, she betrayed her loved ones in order to save them. She risked her life to save his.

He wants more than anything to be with her. One day he hopes to find a way to return. He still hasn't found a way. He may never find a way. Until that day, he is content as long as he can dream.

He freezes as he feels her hand on his back. His thoughts and feelings disappear as he waits for a spark, for a twinge of feelings, for anything. He turns and he kisses her softly on the lips.

He feels nothing. The small bolts of electricity were gone, his heart does not belong to her. His heart belongs to the women of his dreams, to the mother of his son, to his first wife, his queen.

He pulls away.

"I can't lie to you, I can't do this anymore," he whispers as he takes his wedding ring off and places it into her hands.

She looks up at him with tears in her eyes. She opens her mouth to protest, but nothing comes out. She looks into his eyes.

She knows that he is right. She wants to beg him to stay, she wants everything to be safe, she wants everything to be her way. She nods and clutches the ring in her hand.

"I'm sorry," he replies as he turns away.

He walks away from her. He feels light and carefree, he no longer feels the weight upon his shoulder. He is free to love her. He is free to tell his family and friends the truth.