***********************************************

 

Title: Deseo (Means "I desire" in Spanish and it sounds cooler, I think)

Rating: R

Disclaimer: Not mine

Summary: Maria comes back after four years.

Author's Notes: Yes this takes places in Roswell, but no, none of them are

aliens. There's nothing alien about this fic, just humans with human

problems :)

 

**************************

 

Stepping out of the car I stretched, it had been a long, tiring trip but I

was finally here, I was back. I paid the taxi driver and then turned around

to look at my surroundings, things didn't seem like they'd changed much.

Although the house, if possible, looked smaller, but it was still warm and

welcoming, or so it seemed to me. I felt a pang of pain looking at it, I

suppose that would always be there, no matter how many years went by. The

rest of the town looked about the same, some new houses here and there, a

few faces I didn't recognize staring at me, but overall it was still the

same town I had left four years ago. I let my eyes wonder to the Guerin

house and lingered there for a minute. The house was bigger now, they had

some extensions done and a second floor added to it, maybe the family had

grown, both siblings were old enough to be married by now, and maybe had

some kids of their own. Were they even still living there? I took in a deep

breath, I suppose I would find out soon enough.

 

I looked back to my old house again, sighing I opened the gate and made my

way to the porch. I lifted my hand and knocked on the door, hoping Sean was

home, he knew I was coming so he better be there. I was about to knock again

when the door opened and a disheveled looking Sean answered. He looked

confused for a second, obviously I had woken him up, in the middle of the

afternoon I may add. Once his sight adjusted he got huge grin on his face.

 

"Maria"

 

"Hey Sean, forgot I was coming?" By his appearance I didn't even need to

ask.

 

"Nah, I didn't forget, it just slipped my mind." He smiled scratching a part

of his body I didn't need to see him scratch. I grunted in disgust and

pushed him aside to get inside. I love my cousin but we were never big on

the public displays of affection thing. I looked around the small house,

things seemed to still be in fairly good condition, that is ignoring the

pile of dishes in the sink, the dirty clothes scattered around the living

room, and the thick coat of dust some of the furniture was sporting.

 

Our house, I was actually back in our house, mine and mom's. What surprised

me the most is that it didn't hurt as I thought it would.

 

"I'm happy you're here cous. I couldn't wait much longer." Sean said while

putting on a shirt.

 

"When do you leave?" I asked while still surveying the house.

 

"Well," he said sitting on the couch, "now that you're here, I can leave

tomorrow"

 

"So soon?" I frowned.

 

"What? Do you need me here?"

 

"No, not really, I just didn't think you were in such a hurry to leave."

 

"It's not like that Maria, you know that, but this job is really good, I

can't pass it up. I'll be making more money than I did at Guerin's

construction." Sean had gotten a job in Albuquerque not too long ago, it was

also construction but he was offered a better position and better pay, at

least according to him, although I had a sneaking suspicion it had more to

do with a girl than anything else. He told me he had met a wonderful girl a

couple of months ago, and she lived in Albuquerque. I didn't need to be a

brain to figure that one out, so he was in a hurry to leave and needed me to

come see about the house.

 

When mom died in that accident I packed up and left town, I couldn't stay, I

didn't want to stay anymore. The pain, and the memories were choking me, and

I didn't want them. So I left the house to Sean and didn't bother to come

back until now. I could've told Sean to rent it to someone or something, but

I needed to escape New York, story of my life, seems I was always running.

 

"Fine." I sighed, I knew he was gonna leave so why try to keep him here

longer. Besides I needed time to be by myself, that's the reason I came back

anyway. This was the opportunity I was looking for. "You leave tomorrow, but

if you don't help me clean this mess, you'll be going to Albuquerque with a

part of your body missing." He let out a laugh and got up immediately.

 

"I think that's what I missed the most about you cous, your sense of humor"

 

***************************

 

After an hour of cleaning non stop we finally sat down to rest.

 

"Whew, it was dirtier than it looked." Sean said sitting next to me, handing

me some water, and gulping down some of his own.

 

"So, tell me what's been going on? Tell me all the dirt." If I was staying

here for a while, I needed to know what was what.

 

"Well, there's nothing much to tell. Mrs. Smith retired so her daughter took

over the convenience store. Um, some new people have moved into town, they

work for Guerin too. Oh, speaking of Guerin, Tess is getting married"

 

I looked at Sean with wide eyes. "Really?" I could feel an actual smile on

my face at the thought of Tess. When the Guerin family moved to town I

didn't think I was going to like them, I didn't like anybody. But Tess and I

hit it off right away and she was always a really good friend to me, she

didn't care about my "reputation" as a troublemaker. She was always nice and

didn't care that the popular girls frowned upon our friendship. I think she

was closest to me than she was to any of them, and that pissed them off.

 

"With whom?" I asked excitedly, but before Sean could answer I answered for

him. "Don't tell me, Max Evans right? I mean it has to be, those two were so

in love."

 

"Actually no, they broke up a long time ago."

 

"What?" I was surprised. They broke up? That was strange, in high school

they were almost attached to the hip, everybody thought they'd get married

someday. "What happened? Those two were so perfect for one another, I mean

Tess was so beautiful and popular and Max, well, he was every girl's

fantasy."

 

"Even yours?" Sean winked at me with a teasing grin on his face, and I

rolled my eyes.

 

"No, but that's because I'm special. I don't go saps like Max. I like my men

hard!" Sean choked on his water and I laughed at him. He still had a dirty

mind. "Just tell me about Tess."

 

He glared at me and then cleaned his mouth with his shirt before continuing.

"They broke up about a year after you left. I think it was the long distance

thing you know. Tess went to a college right here in New Mexico, while Max

went to Harvard, and rumor has it, he met someone there."

 

"Bastard! He seemed so sweet and romantic. I can't believe he would do that!

What a pig!"

 

"I said it was a rumor Maria, geez, get worked up why don't you?"

 

I hit him upside the head and he narrowed his eyes at me. "Just tell me

who's she getting married to." I finally asked.

 

"Kyle Valenti."

 

I almost spit out my water. "Kyle Valenti?! As in...Kyle Valenti?!"

 

"Yup, the town pretty much reacted that way too."

 

"How did that happen? They never even talked in High School."

 

"Well, I'm sure they talked at least once, I mean he [i]is[/i] her brother's

best friend."

 

Michael, I hadn't let myself think about him in a long time. "Oh my God, and

how did [i]                he[/i] take the news?"

 

"Michael? Well, I'm not sure, but there was a time when you could cut the

tension with a knife at work."

 

"Kyle works for him too?"

 

"Yep, he's his right hand man."

 

"Wow, that must have been intense."

 

"Yeah, I guess, things are better now though. Now that you're back you can

talk to Tess yourself, she always asks about you."

 

"She does?" I smiled feeling kind of guilty. I never asked about Tess in the

three or four times I talked to Sean during the time I was gone.

 

"Oh, yeah, all the time, I'm sure she'll be happy to see you."

 

"It'll be great to see her too." I smiled.

 

Sean looked at me for a moment, and then spoke. "You do realize he's still

in this town and living in that house right?"

 

"He who?" I feigned ignorance.

 

"Michael." Sean smirked "You two always had a weird thing going on."

 

"There was nothing going on, he was an ass and I called him on it, that's

all."

 

"Sure." Sean gave me a patronizing smile and got up. "I better go pack my

stuff." He said and left me alone with my thoughts. Michael Guerin, he was

always so rude to me when we were younger, always teasing me, pulling my

hair, calling me names. We were in High School yet we...No, [i]

he[/i] acted like a little kid. He even dared to kiss me once, when I

tried to slap him, he caught my hand and laughed at me. I hated him.

 

For a brief moment I remembered the night we took comfort in each other, a

night when we sought the other out because no one else could understand us,

because no one else mattered but each other. I pushed that thought aside, I

wasn't ready to think about that. I wondered what it would be like to see

him again, did he remember, or did he try to forget as I did?

 

Tess, yes, think about Tess. She was so much different than her brother, she

was always so nice, and bubbly. I couldn't understand how they could be

related. I even said to that her a few times, she just laughed and said that

the only reason Michael teased me so much, was because he was emotionally

handicapped, and that was his way of letting me know he liked me. Riiiight.

 

I shook myself out of those thoughts, and got up from the couch to help my

cousin pack up, I wished I could've spent more time with him, but I was

looking forward to being by myself after so long, I needed it.

 

******************************

 

PART 2

 

Sean had left a little over an hour ago and I was almost done unpacking.

Looking around the house I smiled, it looked good, such an improvement from

the day before. Going into the bathroom I washed my hands and face and tied

my hair in a ponytail. I checked myself in the full size mirror behind the

door and decided I looked good enough, cut offs and a white shirt tied

around my waist, not bad for a walk around town. Going into my room I put on

my sandals and headed outside, time to see what was new and what was the

same.

 

I locked the house and then stepped onto the street,  I started walking not

really knowing where I was going, maybe I could go to the hardware store,

pick up some supplies. I realized Sean hadn't bothered to fix the back door

and it was barely hanging in there. Sure I didn't know much about fixing

things around the house, but I could learn.

 

I smiled at some the people who said hi to me, frankly I didn't remember

many of them but if they remembered me, then so be it. Finally reaching the

store I stepped inside. Good old Mr. Harrison was still there, he looked

older but he was still a big man, all the kids used to be scared of him, and

he loved it. Looking at him now I realized I still felt a little twinge of

that fear in my stomach. I shook my head, I was a grown woman for crying out

loud, but childhood memories are hard to forget. I wondered if the younger

crowd were afraid of him too.

 

He was talking to a young guy, he looked kind of familiar, but I couldn't

quite place him. Neither of them noticed me so I just looked around the

store, and after staring at some nails for about ten minutes, I decided I

needed help. I stepped up to the counter and smiled at the old man,

wondering if he'd remember me.

 

"Hi." I smiled brightly, he smiled at me and looked as if he knew me but

couldn't quite place me. "I was wondering if you could help me out, um, my

door is hanging by a thread and obviously I have to fix it, problem is I

have no idea how." I giggled like a little girl and immediately felt stupid.

 

"Don't I know you?" Mr. Harrison smiled.

 

"Uh, yeah you do."

 

"Don't tell me." He smiled and kept quiet for a moment, I looked to my side

to the young man next to me, he also seemed to be trying to remember me,

damn, had I changed that much? Yeah, okay, my hair was long now, and I had

develop a little more, at least I could say I had boobs now.

 

"Maria?" The old man asked tentatively and I smiled.

 

"You caught me."

 

"Well color me surprised, what in the heck are you doing here?"

 

"I'm here taking care of the house."

 

"Ah, is it because Sean got that job?"

 

"You know about that?"

 

"You forget this is a small town sweetheart." He winked at me and it felt a

little odd, the man I spent a great deal of my childhood being scared of was

being...Nice to me.

 

"Wait, you're Maria Deluca?" The young man asked me and Mr. Harrison smiled

brightly.

 

"The hurricane herself." He said and I cringed a little, people still called

me that? Stupid Michael and his stupid names for me.

 

"Oh man, it's been so long." He smiled brightly.

 

"Yeah it has." I smiled at the young man, still not knowing who he was.

 

"You have no idea who I am do you?"

 

"Sorry." I said feeling a little embarrassed.

 

"Kyle Valenti."

 

My mouth dropped, oh man, how did I not recognize him? Of course he looked

more handsome than I remembered, and where had he gotten all those muscles

from? Seriously, had he always been this handsome and how come I never

noticed. I was beginning to understand Tess.

 

"Wow, look at you." I couldn't help myself and hugged him. Couldn't blame a

girl for trying to cop a feel right? He seemed surprised for a minute but

soon returned my hug warmly.

 

"Look at me? Look at you, you are a babe." He said to me, and there was that

stupid giggle again. Oh man, I needed to get out of this store, fast.

 

"Kyle." Mr. Harrison coughed and he smiled shyly at me, I rolled my eyes

smiling. It was just a hug for crying out loud.

 

"Mr. Harrison, you look great too, not as scary as you used to be." I said

and the old man let out a big laugh.

 

"Does that mean I don't scare you anymore...Not that I ever really did

right?" He winked at me. Of course he scared me, but I was the only kid in

town who tried not to show it. I was way too proud to show fear. "I still

remember when you'd sometimes come in here, your little hands curled into

tight fists, your face all red." He laughed again and I covered my face.

 

"I can't believe you remember that."

 

"Of course I remember, everyone remembers you Maria."

 

"I'm not too sure that's a good thing." I smiled and both men smiled at me

too. I was happily surprised to realize they truly were happy to see me.

"So," I clasped my hands together, "which one of you is going to help me?"

 

Half an hour later I was walking back to the house with a bag from the

store, now I just had to figure out what to do with what I bought.

 

"Maria!" I heard my name being called, turning around I saw Kyle driving a

nice convertible. I let out a soft whistle, people seemed to be doing well

in this town. He slowed down and stopped in front of me.

 

"Nice ride." I said giving him thumbs up.

 

"Yeah." He smiled shyly, almost blushing. I had to smile too, you could put

the small town boy in a cool car but he was still just a small town boy.

"Um, I was on my way to Tess's, do you want to come with. I'm sure she would

want to see you."

 

My heart started beating faster, going to the house? I wanted to see Tess,

but I wasn't too sure I was ready to go back there.

 

"I heard you two are getting married." I smiled, trying to divert him for a

moment so I could make up my mind. "Congratulations."

 

"Thanks." He smiled brightly and I could tell he was a goner. "I bet you

couldn't believe it when you found out."

 

"Uh..."

 

"Don't worry, most people reacted that way too."

 

"It's just kind of surprising that's all, I didn't even know you guys liked

each other."

 

"You wouldn't, Tess never gave me the time of day until pretty boy Evans was

out of the picture." Kyle said that with a gleam of mischief in his eyes. I

laughed at his description of Max. He was a pretty boy wasn't he?

 

"So you mean to tell me you liked her all those years she was with him."

 

"Who didn't? I think every boy in school was in love with her. But none of

us stood a chance."

 

"Hmm, but see," I waved an accusatory finger at him, "even if they knew they

didn't have a chance, they still tried, you didn't."

 

"Because I didn't think it would happen, and I had my own woman to take care

of."

 

I let out a laugh and Kyle looked at me as if offended. "Oh come on Kyle,

woman? How many girlfriends did you have in High School anyways?"

 

"Hey practice makes perfect." He defended himself.

 

"Sure." I rolled my eyes. "Maybe that's the reason Tess never looked at you.

You were such a player."

 

"I was not." He rolled his eyes. "If you remember I usually had a girlfriend

a year, one per each grade, and I was damn faithful too." I started

laughing, I never really talked much with Kyle but whenever I did I usually

had a good time, he was a funny guy. "So, coming or what?" He asked again.

 

"Uh, well." I bit my lip, this was stupid, I could go back to my own house

and face those memories, why couldn't I go back to theirs?

 

I took in a deep breath and wondered if Michael was there right now. Was I

ready to see [i]him[/i]? "Sure, what the hell." I said softly.

 

"Great, hop on." He said smiling. I smiled too, this was gonna be fun,

seeing Tess again, talking, catching up on old times, and it really didn't

matter if Michael was there or not. I kept repeating that over and over in

my head, wishing I could make my heart believe it too.

 

 

PART 3

 

Kyle parked outside their house and I looked across the street to mine,

wishing I was there now. This wasn't looking like a very good idea now that

we were here. Kyle smiled at me and I followed him inside, he opened the

door and went in, obviously locking doors in this town was still not a

necessity.

 

"Tess, babe, you here?!" He called out as soon as we stepped in. I took in

my surroundings, the first floor looked almost the same as I remembered,

except for the stair leading to that new second floor. Kyle disappeared

through a door that I knew led to the kitchen and then to the garden. I took

in a deep breath, this wasn't so bad, but I had to force myself not to look

towards the hallway that led to his room, nor to remember how sweet and

gentle he'd been with me that night.

 

Kyle appeared again smiling, but before he could say anything I saw a flash

of blonde behind him, followed by a loud shriek. Suddenly two arms were

squeezing the life out of me. I smiled and hugged my friend back.

 

"Oh my God, I can't believe you're back. This is so fantastic, I had no idea

you were coming, I see Sean all the time, how come he didn't tell me you

were coming? I swear I'm gonna kill him. Oh it's so good to see you." Tess

was ranting on and on in my ear

 

"Tess hon, maybe you should let her breathe." I heard Kyle say and was

thankful for it, for such a little woman she was strong. Tess let go of me

and looked me up and down with a big grin. "You look amazing."

 

"Thanks, so do you. Then again you were always beautiful."

 

"So were you, you were just too busy fighting with everyone to notice."

 

"Yeah right." I rolled my eyes laughing.

 

"Well, come on." She grabbed my hand and led me to the garden. "We have so,

so, so much to talk about."

 

"And that would be my cue." Kyle said. "I'll see you later Maria, I'm gonna

go watch some TV babe." He kissed Tess, and headed to another room.

 

"He's well trained, he can smell girl talk a mile away." Tess laughed.

 

***********************************

 

"One day I looked up and he was there." Tess said smiling, we had been

talking and laughing for about half and hour, we had been reminiscing about

the past and our friendship. Now we were getting into guy talk.

 

"That sounds romantic."

 

"You wouldn't think it with a guy like Kyle, but he's such a sweetheart."

 

"You look very much in love."

 

"I am, we are."

 

"So, tell me to mind my own business but I'm wondering..."

 

"About Max?" Tess cut me off before I could finish.

 

"Yeah, I mean you two were like the perfect couple, everyone thought you

guys were gonna be together forever or something."

 

"I know." Tess sighed. "Believe me when we broke up it was a shocker to me

too." I nodded and Tess sighed again. "It's just, things change...They get

complicated, especially if you live in different states and one of you

starts seeing someone else and then lies about it."

 

"Max?" I guessed.

 

"Yup, who would've thought, Max Evans, the perfect guy, the perfect

boyfriend, the perfect everything was cheating and lying to me. Not just me

but to the other girl as well."

 

"Tess, I'm so sorry."

 

"Doesn't matter now." She shrugged. "But at the time, it hurt like hell.

Michael wanted to kill him." Tess smiled and I chuckled, that sounded like

Michael alright. "I think he might've if I hadn't practically attached

myself to him for the first couple of months."

 

"Ah, so that's how you and Kyle..." I gestured with my hands to make my

point.

 

Tess smiled shyly. "Yeah, I went everywhere with them and Kyle was so sweet

and understanding with me. And my brother, God bless the big lug, he's been

my rock since...Well, you know." I saw a flash of sadness in her eyes and I

gulped, yeah I knew. "He didn't mind me tagging along, he didn't say much,

but, would let me rant on and on about Max until there was nothing left to

say. That's when I started noticing Kyle and well, now we're getting

married." She finished smiling.

 

"How did Michael react?" I couldn't help myself, I wanted to know.

 

"Whew, I think we need something with alcohol in it for that one." Tess

giggled and got up to go into the house. "I'll get us some beers, be right

back." I smiled at her and then turned around to look at the garden. I

remembered being there a couple of times and thinking it was a beautiful. It

still was, I suppose Tess took care of it now. I got up from the chair and

walked towards some beautiful roses, and bent down to smell them.

 

"Careful with the thorns." I heard a very masculine voice behind me, and

immediately jumped up. Turning around, I found the most intense brown eyes

I'd ever seen staring back at me. I knew those eyes, eventhough he had

changed a little, he didn't need to say who he was, I knew. Michael Guerin.

 

By the look he was giving me, I could tell I didn't need to say who I was

either, he knew me too. As soon as I turned around his eyes narrowed and his

mouth opened slightly. He recognized me right away too.

 

I bit my lip wishing he would stop staring at me, it was like nothing else

existed. I wished he would say something, or maybe I should say something,

but what was there to say? I could say that his eyes were still piercing,

that he was more handsome and sexy than I remembered. That I spent four

years trying to forget, but now that I saw him everything was flooding back

to me. I saw him opening his mouth to say something but at that moment Tess

came back.

 

"Michael, you're home." She smiled brightly.

 

He ignored her, and she put our beers down while he still stared at me. It

was getting kind of uncomfortable for me now. "I was looking for you and

Kyle." He finally spoke.

 

"Yeah, Kyle is watching TV." Tess smiled, and I noticed she was looking at

us with great amusement, was it that obvious our shock at seeing each other

again? "I see you two already saw one another. Doesn't she look great

Michael?" I half expected her to give him a nudge and a wink.

 

"Amazing." He said running his eyes up and down my body, I could feel my

face burning. "Who is she again?"

 

"That's Maria, Michael." Tess slapped him in the arm but I doubted he

noticed.

 

"So it is you." He said softly and my heart started beating faster, I was

right, he had recognized me.

 

"The one and only." Tess answered smiling. I forced myself to look away from

him, and walk back to the table. I could tell he was following my every

move, and I can't say part of me didn't enjoy the attention. When I sat down

again, I finally looked up at him and he smiled, not a second later he

excused himself and walked back into the house. I forced my eyes away from

his body when he walked away, it really wouldn't look good if Tess caught me

checking out her brother.

 

"I'm sorry about him, he's still socially challenged." Tess smiled

apologizing for Michael walking away without really acknowledging me.

 

"Don't worry, I know how he is." I said trying to sound like seeing him

didn't affect me in the least.

 

"So, where were we?

 

"His reaction to you and Kyle" I said pointing to where Michael had

disappeared.

 

"Oh yeah, Michael's reaction." Tess took a deep breath. "Well, he wasn't too

thrilled. He thought Kyle was taking advantage of me, and he didn't talk to

him for quite a while."

 

"Is he okay with it now?"

 

"Yeah, I mean they're best friends, and he's my brother, eventually he had

to cave." Tess laughed. "But listen, enough about me and my family, I've yet

to find out about you. Tell me what's being going on?"

 

"Well, there really isn't much to tell." I said. "I live in New York as you

know, and I used to work as a secretary."

 

"Used to?"

 

"I quit my job." I blurted out. "It paid well, and the people were great,

but it just wasn't me you know."

 

"Oh, so how long are you gonna be in town for?"

 

"I don't know." I sipped on my beer. "I need to be away from New York right

now."

 

"Why? Are you in trouble." Tess frowned. "Maybe I could help you."

 

"Not unless you have a manual on love and men."

 

"Oh, that kind of trouble."

 

"Yup."

 

"The worse kind." Tess sighed drinking her beer. "Want to talk about it?"

 

"There isn't much to tell. He told me he loved me, I couldn't say it back,

there was nothing else to do or say."

 

"I'm sorry." Tess squeezed my hand and I smiled at her, glad to be with my

friend again. "Hey, at least that brought you back and now you can be at my

wedding."

 

"When [i]is[/i] the wedding?"

 

"A couple of weeks." Tess smiled, but there was something off about that

smile.

 

"Is there something wrong?"

 

"Nah, nothing. Listen, why don't you come to dinner tonight." I narrowed my

eyes at her, she was changing the subject.

 

"I don't know." I said, I really didn't know, dinner? With Michael in the

house?

 

"Come on, you have to, I won't take not for an answer."

 

"Thanks, but really I don't..."

 

"No!" Tess got up. "I don't want to hear it. You go home now, take care of

whatever you have to and then come back by say...Six? And I swear Maria if

you don't show, I'm gonna go to your door and I'm gonna drag you here

myself."

 

"Fine." I grumbled, when Tess got something in her head there was nothing to

do but let her be.

 

********************************

 

Six came too soon, I was nervous, I didn't want to interact with Michael

anymore than strickily necessary, yet here I was, going to dinner over to

his house, where I was gonna be forced into spending time with him. I took a

deep breath and knocked on their door, hoping this would be over soon.

 

The door opened and of course who else was gonna answer but him. He looked

me up and down with a stupid smirk on his face, he always did that and it

used to drive me nuts, it still does. I could feel a blush on my face.

 

"Hey, you look great."

 

"Thanks." I narrowed my eyes at him, compliments from Michael Guerin? Well

that was new. I wasn't even wearing anything too fancy or anything, it was

just a simple summer dress. I let my hair down and put on a little make up,

not too much, just enough to let it show I was wearing something.

 

He was still staring at me and I was getting fidgety. "Well, are you gonna

let me in or do I have to pass a test or something."

 

"Well, as much as I would like to [i]test[/i] you, I don't think Tess would

appreciate it." He winked at me and I narrowed my eyes at him, I let myself

wide open for that one didn't I? He moved aside and I was finally able to

walk in. He led me to the garden where I saw Kyle wearing a silly looking

"kiss the cook" apron and cooking a barbecue. I smiled, Tess was next to

him, laughing at something he was saying, they really did look cute

together. My smile faded when I felt a warm body behind me, Michael. I

stiffened, especially when I heard something that sounded suspiciously like

a sniff. I turned around sharply and was surprised by how close to me he

actually was.

 

"Did you just smell me?" I narrowed my eyes at him. He smirked, and I wished

I could slap that stupid grin off his face. He was about to say something

when Tess noticed us.

 

"Maria, I'm so glad you made it. I was about to go to your house and drag

you here." I glared at Michael one last time and then turned around to smile

at my friend. Tess hugged me and led me to Kyle.

 

"I didn't know you'd be cooking." I smiled at him, and he chuckled.

 

"Pfft, me either, but you know how she is, she dragged my ass to the store

and then ordered me to cook."

 

Tess slapped his arms in mock anger. "I didn't order you to cook." Kyle

smiled at her and then looked at me. "Who are you gonna believe, the poor,

abused, wearing a stupid apron boyfriend or the demanding girlfriend over

here."

 

I laughed. "Oh I think I'll be staying out of this one."

 

I felt an hand wrap around my arm. "That's a good idea." I heard Michael say

before he dragged me away from Kyle and Tess. "So, what would you like to

drink?"

 

"I don't know, just give me a coke." I said quickly, looking back at Tess

and Kyle, the sooner he gave me my drink the sooner I could walk back to

them and away from him.

 

"Glass?"

 

"Yeah, thanks." He was smirking again, damn him! Why is it that he could be

so relaxed around me and I was a bundle of nerves. He served me my coke and

as soon as I took it I started to walk back to Tess. I didn't get too far,

Michael stepped in front of me, stopping me. "Where are you going? Don't you

want to talk to me?"

 

"I'm sorry, but I don't really have anything to say to you." I was being

rude, I didn't care. "We were never friends."

 

"And who's fault was that?" He had a condescending smile on his lips. "I

always tried to be friendly."

 

"What are you talking about? You were always teasing me and making me so

angry."

 

"Yeah, because you were such an easy target." He chuckled. "You made things

interesting for me in this town."

 

"Shut up." I glared at him, I had no qualms about showing him how much I

still disliked him.

 

"Hopefully you haven't lost your touch and will makes things interesting

again."

 

"I'm not here for your amusement!"

 

"Probably not, doesn't mean I can't enjoy you right?" He winked at me and I

rolled my eyes, not knowing what else to do.

 

"You're still an ass, you know that, how is it that we all managed to grow

up except you?" I barked at him, and by the look on his face, I could tell I

had managed to piss him off.

 

"You don't know anything about me, you never have!" He said harshly and I

was taken aback. "If anyone is still stuck in time that's you little girl,

holding school grudges, very mature." He moved aside and went into the

house. I felt a little bad, he was right, he seemed sincere there for a

minute, like he truly was happy I was back. But couldn't he tell that I

didn't know how to act around him? Things were so confusing when I left,

they still were, at least when it came to him. I didn't know what to do. I

sighed and made my way back to Tess and Kyle.

 

We talked and laughed while Kyle cooked, I didn't see Michael again until

Tess went to look for him when the food was ready. He sat next to me, but

I'm sure that was only because it was the only seat available when he came

outside. Tess and I did most of the talking during dinner, with some funny

comments from Kyle and chuckle from Michael here and there.

 

As soon as he was done he got up and left, Tess smiled shyly at me,

obviously feeling uncomfortable with her brother's actions. I smiled and

tried not to let it bother me. He was still just an ass after all.

 

We kept talking for a while until I decided that it really was time for me

to leave, I didn't want to be there anymore, Michael was obviously avoiding

me and didn't want me there.

 

"I'll go with you." Tess got up but I stopped her

 

"You don't need to. I can let myself out, you keep your boyfriend company."

Both Tess and Kyle smiled and I made my way out of that house, not intending

to come back any time soon. I was almost out the door when a hand brushed

past me, keeping the door closed. I turned around sharply to see Michael

looking at me in the dimly lit room.

 

"What are you doing?" I asked with a thread of a voice and I hated it, more

so I hated the tingles I felt through my body.

 

"I didn't get a good [i]smell[/i] before. I want to now." He said close to

my body, I didn't know whether to slap him, or just turn around and leave.

He wasn't touching me, but he was too close for comfort.

 

"I want to go." I said with determination in my voice.

 

"Why didn't we ever get along?" He said softly and I saw him start to lean

in.

 

"Because you were always teasing me, and making rude comments to me."

 

"And that kiss..." Michael smiled. "You got so mad." I could feel a flush

rising on my face again, especially when I noticed him staring at my mouth.

 

"Careful what you're thinking Michael." I was surprised when my voice came

out sounding so breathy.

 

"And what am I thinking?" He breathed out, his eyes shining as he leaned

down. I moved my head to the side, stopping him from kissing my mouth. That

didn't stop him from kissing my cheek, and then moving his lips to my ear.

 

"Michael....No." I murmured.

 

"You know what I want to do now?" He whispered.

 

"I have an idea, yes." I nodded. He chuckled, and continued to murmur

against my ear, he was giving me goosebumps.

 

"You have a dirty mind Maria."

 

"This is ridiculous, just let me go." I put my hands on his chest to move

him away, but I froze. I was touching him, after so long, I was touching him

again.

 

"Do you remember that night?" He asked softly and I swallowed, he

remembered. "Why did you leave?"

 

Why did I leave him that night, or why did I leave town? "Let me go." I said

again ignoring my thoughts. I couldn't stand this anymore.

 

"You look sexy." He said changing the subject, and licking my ear, I felt my

knees go weak. "Maybe we could go somewhere, I'd love to see what's under

that pretty dress, and you...You could do your own explorations."

 

"Stop it!" I said through gritted teeth, trying to get my foggy mind working

again. I successfully pushed him away from me, he'd gone too far with his

stupid games. He just laughed and kissed my cheek.

 

"Fine, you can go now."

 

"Jerk!" Turning around sharply, I opened the door and all but ran from

there. If I didn't want to come back before, I sure as hell wasn't coming

back now.

 

 

[b]PART 4[/b]

 

I was in the habit of getting up early in the morning, eventhough I had

nothing to do, I was still in New York mode. It took a while for people to

get going around here so there was nothing for me to do but think. Think

about my ex-boyfriend, what he was doing? Did he miss me? Did I hurt him by

leaving? Unfortunately, more often than not my thoughts turned to the one

person I didn't want to think about. Michael.

 

I hadn't seen him for a couple of days, which was a good thing, I wasn't

sure what exactly happened between us that day, I wasn't sure I

[i]wanted[/i] to know what happened that day. I didn't know this Michael,

and I wasn't sure how to deal with him. I especially didn't know how to deal

with the tingles he made me feel. How could he be interested in me all of a

sudden? Yeah, he kissed me once but that was only to piss me off, I'm sure

of it. Why would he be interested? And why did he make it seem like he was

happy I was back? Like he was excited about it?

 

What worried me the most was how I felt when I was near him. He made me feel

more attractive and feminine than I had felt in years, and I couldn't deny

how attractive he was, in fact, he had always been attractive, but most of

the time I was too busy being mad at him to notice. I wasn't mad at him now,

just confused.

 

This was silly, none of this mattered, he was still a jerk, and was probably

just playing with me. Michael was a complication I didn't need. What

frustrated me the most was that I couldn't get him out of my head.

 

I sighed and decided to drink my coffee out in her porch this morning, then

I would shower and get dressed. No sooner had I stepped outside that I

realized it was the wrong move, he was in the street in front of his house,

giving me a great view. My heart started beating faster, and mouth was

slightly agape, watching as he was throwing what looked like very heavy bags

onto the back of, what I assume, was his truck. I hid as best I could behind

one of the poles in my porch and without being able to help myself, I stared

at him. He was wearing some tight, sleeveless shirt and I could see his

muscly arms lifting the heavy bags, and then throwing them onto the truck.

They were the arms of a man used to heavy work, I found myself wondering

what the rest of his body would look like bare. Would his legs be as well

defined as his arms? What about his chest? What about his tummy? From what I

could tell he didn't have one ounce of fat in his body.

 

Minutes later, I saw Kyle arrive in his own truck, and I watched them laugh

and talk with one another. Michael was wearing some old looking cap and it

was casting a shadow on his face, but I could still see some of his facial

expressions, from seriousness to amusement to laughter. And his eyes, they

looked mysterious as always. My own eyes wondered to his lips, he had a very

sensual mouth and I thought back to that kiss so long ago, trying to

remember the feel of it, the taste, but I couldn't. It had been too long

ago, during a time when I hated him.

 

I touched my lips with my fingers and tried to imagine his mouth against

mine. I bit my lip, trailing my hand down to my neck, wondering what his

hands would feel like against my skin...I was captivated by him.

 

Suddenly I realized my heavy breathing, my dried mouth and my sweaty palms.

I ran back into the house, happy that neither Kyle nor Michael had seen me

watching. What the hell was going on with me? I ran my hands through my

hair, why couldn't I get him out of my mind?!

 

Maybe...Maybe if I talked to him....Maybe if we did...Something, I'd get him

out of my head and out of my system for sure. He wouldn't refuse, he made it

clear he was interested in me the other night, maybe we really

could....Argh! What am I thinking? An affair? A one night stand? Was I

actually considering this! No, no, it was stupid, this was just stupid. What

I needed was to stop this, stop thinking about him and his invitation to

explore him.

 

All I needed was a cold shower and to stop lusting after Michael Guerin!

 

****************************

 

Friday night Tess and I decided to have a girl's night. We went to the bar

that was just outside of town. We both wanted to get away, so Tess gave Kyle

some excuse and I, well, I didn't have anyone to give an excuse to.

 

Once we got there, we got a table and immediately ordered some shots, and

lots of beer, the plan was to have fun and forget all of our problems. Mine

with men, and hers with her wedding plans I suppose.

 

"This is great, I haven't had a girls night forever." I said while gulping

down my drink. Tess laughed.

 

"Me either, I mean the girls around here are so boring, I needed someone

like you to wake me up!"

 

"Please." I laughed.

 

"No, I'm serious, I don't think I've really had fun since you left."

 

"What about Kyle?" I winked.

 

"Well, obviously he's been providing [i]that[/i] kind of fun for me." Tess

giggled. "But I mean, girl fun you know. Go out with your girlfriend, talk,

hang out, drink." She said drinking another shot and I followed her lead,

laughing. "I missed you Maria. You were always so much fun, with you I was

just Tess you know, not the popular girl, not Max's girlfriend, or Michael's

sister. I was just Tess, and I loved that."

 

"Well, I missed you too. You were always so nice to me, with everyone else I

always felt like they were judging me, or looking over their shoulders at me

cause they thought they were better."

 

"I don't think that's it, I think they were afraid of hurricane Deluca."

 

"Oh you had to bring that up didn't you?" I rolled my eyes and Tess laughed

at me.

 

"Well, it's true, you might've hated that nickname, but it doesn't mean it

wasn't true. When you got mad, hell even when you weren't mad, you always

managed to make a wreck." Tess was laughing so hard I thought she was gonna

fall out of her chair.

 

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up duck face." Tess stopped laughing immediately, she

looked at me with wide eyes and this time I was laughing at her.

 

"I can't believe you just called me that." Tess was trying to appear mad but

the smile in her face was giving her away.

 

"Oh come on, it's cute."

 

"Do you know how long it took me to convince Michael to stop calling me

that?! I hated that name!"

 

"Oh but that name brought us so much pleasure and joy." I kept laughing

while finishing up my beer and ordering more.

 

"I think that was the only time I saw you and Michael actually get along,

when you came up with that name and laughed in my face. You two together

were a menace to society."

 

"Well, we were never together." I said, and straighten up a little.

 

"Except when you played pranks on me or some other unsuspecting soul."

 

"Which didn't happen very often." I cleared up.

 

"I know, you were too busy driving each other crazy. When you two were

around each other, it was like you existed in your own little world that the

rest of us didn't understand." Tess laughed, and I coughed uncomfortably.

"You know, Michael is really happy you came back, he missed you."

 

I narrowed my eyes. "What are you talking about? Did he say something?"

 

"Not really, you know Michael is not the most expressive guy, but I know my

brother, he was happy when he saw you." I rolled my eyes and drank more

beer. "I mean when you left...It was weird." I looked at her and saw a flash

of sadness there again. I suppose I probably got the same look when I

remembered.

 

"I had to leave." I said softly.

 

"Why?"

 

"I couldn't...I just...It was too much." I said not really knowing what else

to say. I suppose I felt a little ashamed to admit I ran away when everyone

else stayed here, and dealt with things head on.

 

"You didn't..." Tess started but cut herself off.

 

"What?" I pried.

 

She looked up at me. "You didn't...Blame us...Did you?" She asked softly and

I was shocked. How could she think that?

 

"Tess, what are you talking about? Of course not."

 

"It's just, after it happened...Michael and I didn't see you at all, and

then you left town so...I didn't get a chance to..." She trailed off again.

I looked up at her, Michael hadn't told her about that night? He didn't tell

her that we talked, and that he knew how I felt? I took a deep breath,

relieved. That night was something that I could only share with him, it was

too personal. Did he feel the same way about it?

 

"I could never blame you or your family. It was an accident, we all know

that." I took Tess's hand in mine, reassuring her. Mr. and Mrs. Guerin were

kind enough to give my mom a ride when she found herself stranded that

night, they couldn't be to blame for that freak snow storm. It was an

accident.

 

Tess looked at me and gave me a watery smile. I smiled too. "Now we're gonna

stop this, we came here to have a good time. Not to cry." I said waving my

finger at her and ordering us more beer, somehow we had drank an entire

pitcher already. How did that happen? "Let's talk about your wedding?" I

said cheerfully but that didn't seem to brighten Tess up.

 

"You know, I love Kyle." She said out of the blue, and I smiled at her.

 

"I know you do."

 

"No, I mean, I do...I really, really do."

 

"That's good cause you're marrying him."

 

Tess sighed "I know, he's the one, I know he is...He [i]has[/i] to be." She

sounded like she was trying to convince herself.

 

"Tess is there something you want to tell me?"

 

Tess drank more of her beer and I think she was getting a little drunk. "Did

you think I would marry Max when we graduated?"

 

"What?"

 

"Cause everybody thought that, I did too. I loved him so much, I never

thought I could love anybody else."

 

"But you did fall for somebody else."

 

"What if....What if...." She kept trailing off and I narrowed my eyes at

her.

 

"Look, things don't always turn out the way we plan them right? And most of

the time it's usually for the best. Sometimes the person you think is your

destiny, turns out to be just a step towards your true destiny."

 

Tess looked at me as if seriously considering what I was saying.

"Hmm....What?"

 

I burst out laughing. "I'm just trying to reassure you. Work with me here

damnit!" Tess started laughing too. I think we were [i]both[/i] getting a

little drunk.

 

"Okay, would it help if I said I have no idea what you're talking about, but

it sounded pretty."

 

"Yeah." I picked up my glass from the table. "To pretty things." I said and

Tess lift up her glass too, toasting with me.

 

That's the way Kyle and Michael found us, laughing our asses off and

drinking beer. We probably didn't look very pretty right then.

 

 

[b]  PART 5[/b]

 

"Well, well, well...Maria Deluca, I knew you'd be a bad influence on my

girlfriend." Kyle said, and at hearing his voice Tess immediately

straightened up, her eyes got a glow and then she jumped up to hug him.

 

"Oh we were just talking about you." I smiled at him, and noticed Michael

grabbing a chair and sitting next to me, I was planning on completely

ignoring his presence.

 

"I hope it was good." Kyle narrowed his eyes.

 

"I was just telling Maria how much I love you." Tess kissed him noisily and

Kyle chuckled. "Come on, let's go get you something to drink." She said

happily and dragged him to the bar. I think I might've heard Kyle saying

something about coffee and Tess gasping.

 

"You got my sister trashed." Michael spoke and I sighed, great, I'd have to

talk to him now. I turned to face him, I couldn't talk to someone if I

wasn't looking at them right? Right.

 

"She's not trashed, she had some beers, and might possibly be a little

drunk, but she's not trashed." I hadn't noticed I was waving a finger at him

until he caught it in his hand.

 

"Sure, just like you aren't."

 

I gasped. "I'm not trashed, neither is Tess!" I tried to move my finger

again but Michael wouldn't let go of it. "You think men are the only ones

who can hold their alcohol buddy." He chuckled at me and I narrowed my eyes

at him. I was tempted to stick my tongue out to him, but figured he would

laugh and tell me I was drunk again, which I wasn't--I was just slightly

dizzy.

 

"You want some coffee." He whispered in the same tone he'd used the other

day, and the tingles I had tried to forget all week came back with a

vengeance. I almost leaned into him.

 

"Um," I licked my lips and noticed he was really close to my face,

unconsciously my eyes fell to his mouth. Out of their own accord and before

I could stop, my fingers reached out to touch it. Such sensual, full, pouty

lips he had. He opened them up and I could feel his breath against my

wondering fingers. His lips curved into a smile and then he kissed my

fingertips, I giggled softly, looking into his eyes. He was looking at me

with a twinkle of mischief. I smiled, maybe it was the alcohol talking but I

liked it, I liked him.

 

I trailed my fingers to his cheek and smiled when he brought his hand up and

captured mine against his face. "Coffee then?" He asked again.

 

I shook my head. "That means you'd have to get up, and I don't want to let

go." He smiled softly, and turned his face to kiss my palm, then he got up

and encouraged me to do the same. I did, and holding hands we made our way

to the bar. Once there he called the bartender and ordered coffee. I didn't

want coffee, but I didn't want to fight him either.While we waited he turned

around to face me, he let go of my hand only to pass his arms around my

waist and draw me near him. I held onto his arms, the same arms I'd been

ogling at the other day. Laying my head against his chest, I smiled.

 

I took a deep breath and smelled his cologne, he smelled so good, so sexy.

"Did you just [i]sniff[/i] me?" He asked softly and I could tell he was

smiling, the irony was not lost on either of us.

 

"Yes." I admitted smiling, I also admitted to myself that it was probably

the alcohol making me act that way with him. He chuckled and then caressed

my back, one of his hands burying into my hair, pressing me tighter against

him. We stayed that way for a while and I never wanted it to stop, this was

the best feeling I'd had in a long time.

 

"Maria?" He asked softly and I looked up, his eyes were shining with

something I'd seen once before, tenderness. I couldn't help but smile again.

"Coffee." He said and brought the cup into my line of sight, I took it

making sure our fingers brushed together. Maybe I would regret this

tomorrow, but today, right now, I felt happy snuggling against him. I sipped

on my coffee and heard Kyle next to us. When had he gotten there? I turned

around and saw Tess snuggling into him, she looked almost like a kitty, is

that how I looked with Michael?

 

"How much did you guys have to drink?" Kyle asked with a laugh.

 

"A few shots, and a lot of beer." I answered, guess neither one of us

handled alcohol very well.

 

"We should go home." Kyle said smiling, and I saw Tess smiling at her

boyfriend.

 

"You are so handsome." She said caressing his cheek. "I love you." She got

serious and even through the cloud in my head, I once again noticed

something off with her. I was thinking about that when I felt a hand on my

back, Michael's, I turned around to face him and all thoughts about Tess

disappeared.

 

He leaned in to talk to me, "I got here with Kyle and since you guys took a

taxi, we're gonna have catch a ride with them." He said motioning with his

head to Kyle and Tess. "I wish I could take you home by myself though." He

said softly and I smiled, I thought he was being so sweet. The part of my

brain that was still sober thought that it was probably so he could take

advantage of me, but the rest of my brain thought that he was not only sexy,

but too cute for words. He took my coffee and put it on the table, paying

for it, he and Kyle led Tess and I out of the bar.

 

I almost got stuck riding in the back with Tess, but thank goodness my

friend was having none of it, she wanted to ride in the front with Kyle.

Michael and I didn't argue her decision at all. So now here I was, riding in

the back, snuggled up against Michael, he was rubbing my back and being so

sweet with me, it was bringing back memories of a time when he had hold me

like that too.

 

When we finally got to my place, he jumped off the car and then opened the

door for me, taking my hand and leading me to the house. He stopped at the

door while I searched for the key, once I found it, I smiled up at him. He

was standing close to me, the moonlight casting a wonderful glow around us,

and he looked beautiful to me, then again that also might've been the

alcohol talking. I brought my hand up to his face again, caressing his

cheek, he smiled softly and passed his arms around my waist, drawing me

near.

 

"Why did you come tonight?" I asked him.

 

"I knew you'd get in trouble." He said with a cocky smile and, at any other

moment, I would've slap him upside the head.

 

"I mean it, why did you come tonight? And why....Why?" I couldn't ask him

what I didn't know.

 

"I went because I knew you'd be there, and...I don't know why." He spoke

softly and I sighed, he was confused too. He leaned forward and I closed my

eyes thinking he was going to kiss me, instead he rested his forehead

against mine.

 

"I'm not gonna kiss you." My eyes snapped open. "I want to but I think...."

He stopped himself and then continued. "I want you completely sober when it

happens, that way you can't say I took advantage of you or the situation or

something." He smirked, and I frowned, I wasn't drunk damnit! Just a little

dizzy. Maybe I could trick him into it, I licked my lips wanting him to kiss

me so badly.

 

He stared at my mouth, I smiled thinking it had worked, and closed my eyes

again when I noticed he was leaning down. Imagine my disappointment when I

felt him kiss just the corner of my mouth. Before I could say anything he

was walking away from me. I watched him leave and licked the side of my

mouth, wishing I could taste him.

 

***********************

 

The next day Tess went to my house, she said she had a little headache but

was feeling okay, I was feeling okay too. Michael and Kyle were completely

exaggerating, we weren't drunk last night, just dizzy.

 

We sat in the shadows drinking some ice tea and talking about the wedding

and the last minute arrangements. There was only a couple of days left to

the wedding.

 

"So, nervous?" I asked while serving her some ice tea. Tess smiled sadly.

 

"What's wrong?" I frowned, noticing her look. Something was not right and I

wanted to know what once and for all.

 

"Nothing...I'm just nervous like you said."

 

"Tess, come on, this is me. There something wrong, I know there is."

 

"Yeah there is...I'm bummed you can't be my maid of honor."

 

I smiled knowing very well what she was doing, she was changing the subject.

"I wish I could be, but you already asked your cousin, and you can't back

out. Besides I get to be a bridesmaid, that's still nice. And I love the

dresses you picked out." Tess had brought over my dress that evening.

 

"I know, thank goodness you're gonna be there." She got that weird look on

her face again, and I worried. I was about to ask her what was wrong again

when I heard the truck, I turned around and swore under my breath. It was

Michael's truck. I remembered the previous night too well, I wasn't so dizzy

that I couldn't remember how I acted around him. I wish I could forget, I

touched him, and let him touch me, and at the end of the night...I knew he

could tell I wanted him to kiss me. He stopped in front of my house, he was

obviously just getting back from work, he was wearing jeans and a plain

shirt, his cap still on.

 

"I thought you'd be here." He said to Tess and invited himself in. He sat on

a chair next to me, taking his cap off and leaving it on the table. I was

avoiding looking at him. I wasn't even sure why he was there, probably to

torture me.

 

"Yuck, Michael you're all sweaty, you could've at least gone home and wash

before coming over." Tess looked at her brother in disgust. Michael just

smirked, and I bit my lip not to tell Tess to shut up, he looked perfectly

fine to me, all sweaty like that.

 

"How you doin'?" He asked softly to me and I almost fainted at the breathy

quality of his voice.

 

"Fine, you?"

 

"Fine, but I'm really thirsty"

 

"I'll go get you a glass." I said and got up quickly, thankful for the

opportunity to escape him even for a little while.

 

I was reaching for a glass, trying to calm myself when I felt his presence

in the small kitchen.

 

"I'm not an ice tea kind of guy. Do you have a beer?" He asked me and

without turning around I could tell he was close to my body. I could feel

his warmth.

 

"Um, yeah." Still not turning around, I opened the fridge and got a beer. I

took the glass I'd left on the counter and turned around to give it to him,

I came face to...Chest. His chest. I looked up into his eyes was almost

knocked over by the intensity I saw there. He took the beer and glass from

my hand and placed them on the counter. He then stepped closer to me,

pressing our bodies together, I had to force myself to keep my eyes open.

His breath was caressing my face and I was ready to scream at him to take me

right there.

 

He licked his lips and whispered to me. "Feeling better?"

 

"Yes." I breathed out and hated my voice for sounding so husky.

 

"Good, maybe now we can share that kiss."

 

"Michael last night..." I trailed off.

 

"Don't blame the alcohol Maria, you wanted to kiss me last night as much as

you want to kiss me now."

 

"Stop being so damn arrogant will you?" I tried to sound pissed but feared I

was failing miserably.

 

"I'm not being arrogant, I'm just telling the truth. You want to kiss me as

much as I want to kiss you." He put his hands on my waist, drawing me even

closer to his body, if it was possible.

 

I didn't say anything, I don't think I could've made my voice work even if I

wanted to. I just simply licked my lips, and watched as he stared at them.

He leaned down and stuck his tongue out, brushing it softly against my lips.

I closed my eyes at the sensation, that wasn't a kiss, that

was...."Michael." I whispered.

 

"Is that an invitation?" He asked close to my mouth. I opened my eyes and

watched him watching me. He didn't wait for an answer, he leaned down again

and his lips brushed mine, I sighed in pleasure. Michael circled my waist

with an arm and pressed me closer to him. That's when I felt his tongue

caressing my lips, asking for entrance. I opened my mouth slightly and

Michael wasted no time, he entered my mouth and explored it thoroughly,

making me feel wonderfully beautiful and desired for. I brought my hand up

to let it rest on his chest, feeling the well defined muscles underneath his

shirt, a new wave of emotions coursing through me. Michael was caressing my

cheek with his other hand while I moaned against him...

 

"Are you guys alright in there?" We jumped apart at the sound of Tess

calling us.

 

"We're fine!" Michael barked. He looked at me sheepishly, a small smile

playing on his lips, I didn't return the smile. He picked up his glass and

his beer. "I've been wanting to do that for too long." He said and then he

walked out, leaving me alone, confused, aroused and completely pissed at

myself for falling into his trap.

 

*********************

 

I walked out to find Michael and Tess happily talking. I sat down next to

Michael, even though I wanted to be far away from him, but I didn't want it

to make it too obvious to Tess that I was uncomfortable.

 

"Oh Kyle is home!" Tess said suddenly and got up, blowing me a kiss before

running out of the house to meet her boyfriend. I had no chance to stop her

and tell her to call Kyle over, he could've join us, now I was alone with

grabby hands.

 

"Alone at last." He smirked.

 

I narrowed my eyes at him, and then got a cocky smile on my face. "You're

right, you [i]are[/i] alone." I said while getting up and walking into the

house, closing the door on his face. Such an irritating man! Who the hell

does he thinks he is? Kissing me like that, making me feel all those things

I didn't want to feel! He's not [i]that[/i] good looking and I could

certainly resist him, he just caught me off guard with that kiss.

 

I paced around the house for a little bit, irritated with myself for not

being able to stop thinking about that stupid kiss. I wondered if he was

still outside and peeked out the kitchen window, I didn't see anybody,

sighing I opened the door to go clean the table we were sitting at.

 

"I knew you'd come out eventually." I yelped and turned around coming face

to face with Michael. Jerk! He was smiling, sitting right next to the door,

I should've known better than to think he'd give up and go home.

 

"I thought I'd made it pretty clear I didn't want to see you again?"

 

"When did you make it clear? When you were grabbing me and kissing me in the

kitchen?"

 

"Excuse me!" I gasped. "Who kissed who buddy?"

 

"If you didn't want to kiss me then you didn't have to, I wasn't gonna force

you. But it wasn't hard to tell that you [i]did[/i] want to, you were

grabbing me and [i]passionately[/i] kissing me back." He finished with a

triumphant smile on his cocky face.

 

"You caught me by surprise, and you know it." I bit out.

 

"Tell me you haven't thought about me." He got up and grabbed my wrist,

pulling me near him again. "About kissing me, about us doing more than just

kissing!"

 

"Let me go, people will see." I protested through gritted teeth. I was

getting upset now, upset that he could tell I did want to kiss him, and that

I had thought about us doing more.

 

He let go of my hand, and looked down. I could tell he felt a little

embarrassed about his little passionate outburst. "I don't know what kind of

game you're playing here, but I'm not amused, and I'm certainly not gonna

play along, I have a boyfriend." I lied, this was getting too intense for me

and I didn't want it. Something flashed in his eyes, but I couldn't quite

tell what it was, as soon as I saw it, it was gone.

 

He nodded and pursed his lips. "So why isn't he here?"

 

"None of your business." I didn't want to lie anymore than I had to.

 

"So, I guess us going out is out of the question then." I didn't say

anything, he wanted to go out with me? I never thought about that, I thought

he was only looking for a quicky or something. Then again, going out didn't

mean anything, it was just probably his way to get me to bed.

 

"It is." I said trying to convince myself that I was doing the right thing

by lying to him.

 

He nodded. "Fair enough." He picked up his beer and glass and went inside

the house. I sighed in relief, maybe he would give up and leave me alone.

Then, maybe, whatever this was would go away too. I picked up my glass and

Tess's and went inside. When I got there he was washing his glass and then

put it aside to dry.

 

I put the other two glasses in the sink and he washed them too, I raised my

eyebrows. "You didn't have to." I said softly but he didn't say anything.

Instead he dried his hands and then turned around to face me. My breath left

my lungs in a rush, his eyes were dark, smoldering. He advanced on me and I

backed away from him. Not again, he wasn't going to do this again!

Unfortunately, the kitchen was too small and soon I found myself against the

fridge, pinned there, against him.

 

He passed his arms around my waist, and roughly pulled me to him. "What are

you doing?" I asked with wide eyes.

 

"Holding you." He answered calmly. He wasn't just holding me, he was

trapping me tightly against him. I almost couldn't breathe.

 

"Well, stop it!" I put my hands on his shoulders and tried to push him away.

He chuckled softly.

 

"I mean it, let me go." I said through gritted teeth. We were so close I

could smell his masculine scent. He was staring at me, a look of pure,

passionate hunger in his eyes. After a long while he finally spoke again,

his voice was soft.

 

"Am I hurting you?"

 

His voice and his eyes were so tender, he caught me off guard. "No." I

murmured softly, almost before I knew what I was saying.

 

"Why did you come back?" He asked me.

 

"I...I-uh, needed to get away for a while." He nodded, and I hoped he

wouldn't ask anymore questions, I didn't want to tell him I'd lied about the

boyfriend thing. Right now I would tell him the truth if he asked me. His

eyes were pushing me to be sincere with him.

 

"Did you think I'd be here? Did you ever...Think about me?" At that moment,

I thought he looked almost vulnerable, asking such a personal question. Did

he want me to think about him? Is that he answer he was looking for?

 

"I didn't...I...No, I never..." Let myself, I finished that sentence in my

head. I didn't know what else to say. I didn't want to tell him that I

wanted to forget about him because he made me feel too much--like he was

doing now.

 

He got silent again, I had no idea what he was thinking and I almost wished

he would tell me. Did [i]  he[/i] think about me? Unconsciously I licked my

lips and Michael groaned softly, grinding his hips into mine, letting me

feel his excitement. I swallowed loudly and made myself speak. "How long are

you gonna keep me trapped here?"

 

"I don't know...Maybe, till whatever this is goes away." So he was feeling

it too, why wouldn't he be feeling it, he was the one who had made the first

move, all of the moves actually.

 

I looked into his eyes and I knew he was about to kiss me again, and I

couldn't deny that I wanted it, badly. He leaned down slowly, a strange glow

in his eyes. "I'm gonna ask you first now...Are you gonna say no?" He asked.

 

"Would that stop you?" I breathed out.

 

"You want me to kiss you, don't you?"

 

"I don't know what I want." I said closing my eyes, the feelings he was

creating overwhelming me.

 

"But you do want something." It was more of statement than a question. He

brushed his lips against mine. "I want something too." He said huskily. I

held my breath, the touch of his lips creating a whole new set of emotions.

He brushed my lips again and I moved my head, searching for his lips,

wanting this sweet torture over and for him to fully kiss me again. He

finally covered my mouth with his own and I let out a half moan half sigh. I

felt like I was floating, the sensations his body was creating on mine were

nothing short of amazing. His proximity, his scent, the way he was kissing

me. His mouth was perfect, full and firm. He was moving his tongue inside my

mouth with fascinating moves, and I felt like I was loosing my breath.

Everything about him was driving me insane. He finally lifted his head,

letting go of my mouth, there was pure desire in his eyes, I was sure I had

the same look.

 

"I'm happy you came back." He said softly, so softly I almost didn't hear

him.

 

"Really?" My heart was beating so fast I was sure he could feel it against

his chest.

 

"Yes." At that moment realization dawned on me, I could fall for this man.

If I wasn't careful, I would. I knew that now and it scared me. He didn't

want the same thing from me, he was probably just looking for an adventure.

What if I gave myself to him? Completely, entirely, and then he threw it

back in my face. He couldn't seriously be interested in me. He was always so

mean, I was suppose to believe that all of a sudden he felt something for

me? No, he didn't, he just wanted me for my body, get some sex and then move

on. I couldn't, I wouldn't. I started pushing him away from me, trying to

rid myself of him. Michael gave me an odd look and then let go of me. He

probably saw the look on my face.

 

"Why are you doing this?" I asked, I had to know.

 

He looked at me and ran his hands through his hair "I think I overstayed my

welcome...I'll see you around." With that he left me again, I really didn't

know what to think anymore.

 

 

[b]  PART 6[/b]

 

The day of the wedding I woke up early, I had a lot to do and unfortunately

a lot of those things involved being at the Guerin household. I sighed and

went to the bathroom to shower, this was gonna be a long day. I hadn't seen

Michael since he ran out on me, and frankly I was glad. Whatever it was that

was happening between us, it was too intense, and it was creating emotions

in me I hadn't felt in years, if ever. It scared me and I didn't need that

right now.

 

I dressed in some plain jeans and shirt and decided to face the music. I was

helping Tess today and she was probably already waiting for me. As soon as I

opened the door I saw the envelope taped to my door, I narrowed my eyes and

took it, opening it carefully, I didn't know what to think.

 

[i]Dear Maria:

 

I've been thinking a lot lately, thinking about the way my life is and the

way I thought it was going to be. I love Kyle with all my heart, but I have

this thought in the back of my head, and I can't shake it, I've tried to

dismiss this feeling, but I haven't been able to. When you came back into

town I felt it even more, and now I need to find out if there's anything to

it or if it's just me being scared. I'm not sure what to think anymore, all

I know is I can't marry Kyle while I'm feeling this way, it wouldn't be fair

to him or me.

 

So, here's my truth. Max Evans. I'm going to LA to see him, I did some

research and found out he's been living there for a couple of years. I need

to find him and see if there's still anything there. Lately I haven't been

able to get him out of my head, and eventhough I love Kyle, Max is hanging

over me like a ghost. Please understand, after this I fear you'll be my only

friend for a while, especially if there's anything left between me and Max.

 

I have a favor to ask you, I want you to come to LA and find me. I would've

asked you to come with me but I need you to make sure Kyle is ok first.

Don't tell him where I am, he may try to find me. Just reassure him that I

do love him, please, and make sure he's ok. Then come to LA, I'm gonna call

you at your cell and tell you where to meet me.

 

Please Maria, help me. I love you.

 

Tess.

 

PS Don't hate me.[/i]

 

I had to sit down. Tess had ran away, not only that, but the reason she had

ran was the worse possible one.

 

What the hell was I gonna do now? I got up and started pacing nervously, in

no time people were gonna realize Tess was gone. Michael was gonna freak,

and Kyle...I didn't know Kyle that well so I didn't know how he was gonna

take it. How was I suppose to reassure him? Damnit, I knew something was off

with Tess, I should've figure it out, I should've talked to her, but I was

too busy with Michael to give too much importance to Tess.

 

I rushed back into the house and started packing a bag, better be ready to

leave soon, hopefully without anyone noticing or asking me questions about

it. I sighed rubbing my face, I read the note over again and couldn't help

but feel a little guilty, my coming back brought back a lot of memories for

Tess, memories that maybe were long ago forgotten.

 

After packing a few things, I stepped outside again, the Guerin house looked

pretty quiet. I wondered if I would be able to hear Michael's angry shouts

from here when he found out Tess was gone. Before I knew what was happening

or what my feet were doing, I found myself walking towards the house, and in

no time I found myself knocking, having no idea what I was doing or what I

was going to say.  minute later, Michael opened the door, looking

disheveled, obviously just waking up, and look at that chest....No! No,

don't look at the chest, you're here for something else, I told myself.

 

"Maria." He smiled at me and I wanted to kiss him, I had to force myself to

think about Tess again. Crap, Michael was gonna blame me wasn't he?

 

"I-uh, I want to see Tess." What?! I'd gone insane, that was the only

explanation for me being here and asking for Tess knowing what was

happening.

 

"She's not up yet." He said, and...Look at that, he's licking his lips.

 

"Oh, um, well, I'll-uh, go up to her room...I'm suppose to help her today

so..." I trailed off.

 

He smiled and scratched his stomach, yum. "I know, come on in." He stepped

aside for me and I went inside, quickly heading upstairs to Tess's room. I

knocked on the door before opening it, pretending that nothing was wrong.

The windows and curtains were shut close, and the bed was made, I wondered

what time she had left, had she slept on her bed at all? I saw a note on the

bed and picked it up. It was addressed to Kyle. I decided not to read it,

that was for him and him alone. I rubbed my face, what the hell was I doing

here? How was I going to get out of here now without being suspicious? I

looked around the room some more, wondering if I could sneak out the window.

Stupid! Why in the hell did I come here? Oh right, I was insane and I had an

equally insane friend...And then people said I caused trouble.

 

Maybe I could tell Michael I was gonna go home and get some make up stuff,

then I would just leave for LA, it's not like I could do anything for Kyle.

His fiance left him the day of his wedding, I don't think he'd want her

closest friend comforting him.

 

I decided to make a quick getaway, get home, call a taxi, and then leave,

hopefully, before Michael noticed my leaving or Tess being gone. I opened

the door, looking out into the hallway, I saw no one, maybe I could sneak

out.

 

I was almost out the door when I heard him. "Leaving already?" Michael,

damnit, so close.

 

I turned around smiling. "No, I just need some stuff I left at

home...Make-up stuff."

 

"Pfft, doesn't Tess have enough of that? She has like every product out

there." He smiled.

 

"Yeah, it's just I brought some stuff from New York that she doesn't have

and so she-uh, she wants to try it." I giggled softly and hoped Michael

wouldn't notice my acting weird.

 

"Okay, um, you're coming back though right? I made some coffee and stuff."

Aww, he was being sweet again. For a moment I forgot about Tess and was

ready to try his coffee. Then I snapped back to reality and the serious

situation I was, involuntarily, involved in.

 

"Uh, thanks...Yeah, I'll...I'll be back." I said turning around sharply and

running out. I didn't need another Michael smile, or Michael's body, or

Michael being nice. I didn't need Michael period. Not now, he was too

tempting, and I had more important things to do.

 

I ran over to my house and called a cab hoping they'd hurry, although in a

small town like this, cabs were usually at your door pretty fast. I grabbed

a light jacket, and my bag. I checked that everything was turned off and all

the windows were locked. Then I paced around the living room waiting, I was

so nervous. Ten minutes later, I heard the horn of my cab and cringed,

couldn't he knock on my door the idiot! I was trying to be quiet here. I

quickly grabbed my bag heading outside, not wanting the moron to honk the

horn again. I was locking my door when I felt someone grab my bag, thinking

it was the cabby I didn't protest. I just turned around and was ready to

tell him where to, when I came face to chest with a chest I knew only too

well.

 

"Where are you going?" Michael asked me holding onto my bag, I tried to get

it back but he held it out of my reach. I sighed.

 

"I'm going to New York."

 

"Why?"

 

"I-uh, it's personal."

 

"You have to go right now?"

 

"Yes, I got a call and I have to go, so if you don't mind." I tried to reach

for my bag again, but he still held it out my reach.

 

"You're going to New York on Tess's wedding? Nice friend." He said

sarcastically. Damnit! He knew, I could tell he knew.

 

"She'll understand."

 

"How? You haven't even told her."

 

"I will call her." I said through gritted teeth, he was annoying me.

 

"I have a better idea, let's go tell her right now." What? With his free

hand he reached for my hand and started pulling me back to their house.

Crap!

 

"No! Listen I have to go right now." I tried to free myself but he was

gripping me really tight. The cabby looked at us, and smiled. I recognized

him, Johnny, he went to school with us too. He was probably remembering the

way Michael and I were in school, and figured there was nothing wrong with

him dragging me and me kicking him to free myself. "Agh! You are such a pig!

Let me go!" I yelled.

 

"No!" He barked and continued to drag me. We got inside the house and then

he started pulling me to Tess's room, uh-oh. "Let's tell Tess you're

leaving." He said and dropping my bag, he opened the door to her room. "Oh

look at that, she's not here!" He yelled. Let the freaking out begin, I

thought to myself.

 

"Where is she?" I asked, trying to play dumb, but I could tell he wasn't

buying it.

 

"I don't know, you tell me."

 

"How should I know?"

 

"Right." He picked up the note Tess left for Kyle. "You knew she wasn't here

when you came over this morning didn't you?"

 

"No."

 

"If you didn't, then why didn't you say anything about her not being in her

room and this note!" He yelled again.

 

"Stop yelling at me!" I yelled back, tired of being treated like a little

kid. "And let go of my arm!" I pulled my arm and he finally let go.

 

"Tell me where she is."

 

"I don't know where she is."

 

"Where are you going?"

 

"New York."

 

"Liar! You're meeting her somewhere. Where the hell is she!"

 

"I can't tell you!" I yelled back, might as well, he wasn't buying that I

didn't know.

 

"Fine, I'm going with you." I laughed, and he glared at me. "I'm dragging

her ass back to town one way or another."

 

"Look, she just needs a few days. We'll be back soon." I said trying to

leave the room but he stepped in front of me, stopping me.

 

"You're not leaving without me."

 

"Yes, I am." I stood up straighter, not letting him intimidate me.

 

"No, you're not!" He yelled.

 

"Yes I am!" I yelled back equally loud.

 

"NO!"

 

"YES!"

 

"What's going on?" A voice we both knew interrupted our little yelling match

and we both stopped to face him...Kyle. He was standing by the door looking

at us with a confused frown on his face. "Where is Tess?"

 

I'm sure Michael and I looked as stupid as we felt. How could we tell him?

He was gonna be so hurt. At that moment I didn't like Tess too much, she was

putting all of us in a difficult situation. I looked at Michael and he

looked back, then he dropped his gaze to the note in his hand and slowly

handed it to Kyle. He took it and read it, not a single expression on his

face. Michael and I didn't move, I didn't know what to do and I'm sure

Michael didn't either. Kyle finally put the note down and went to sit on her

bed.

 

"She left me." He said softly.

 

"No!" I blurted before I could stop myself. I had to defend my friend. "She

didn't leave you, she'll be back, I know she will...She loves you." He

looked at me with such sadness in his eyes it almost knocked me over.

 

"Did you read the note?"

 

"No." I shook my head, I didn't want him to think I was invading his

privacy.

 

"Here." He handed it to me, I took it but didn't read it. "She went to look

for him."

 

I guess she told him about finding Max. Honesty was usually pretty high up

on my list, but right now, looking at Kyle. I wished Tess had kept that bit

of information to herself.

 

He looked broken and I could only pray Tess knew what she was doing. Max

wasn't worth loosing Kyle.

 

 

[b]PART 7[/b]

 

Kyle kicked me and Michael out of Tess's room and then locked himself in, I

didn't think it was the healthiest or safest thing for him to do, but

Michael dragged me out even before I could open my mouth. So now here I am,

in Michael's room, and I hope he can't see the blush I can feel on my face.

 

"So where are we going?" He asked and I snorted before I realized how

unappealing that sounded, but I didn't care.

 

"[i]We[/i] are not going anywhere buddy. I'm going alone, I already told

you."

 

"And I already told you, you're not going anywhere without me."

 

I sighed, he was so damn stubborn. "You are such a pain."

 

"Look who's talking." He murmured and I glared at him. He reached for a bag

in his closet and started packing some clothes. I rubbed my face and tried

to think of something to get rid of him.

 

"What about Kyle? We can't leave him alone here."

 

"We're not, I'm calling his dad, I'll ask him to stay with him."

 

Crap. "What about your job? You can't just take off."

 

"Sure I can, I'm the boss, besides I don't think this is gonna take long,

and I'll ask Jim to look over things while I'm gone too."

 

Damnit! I bit my lip, what to do, what to do. I looked at the door, maybe I

could make a run for it, maybe Johnny was still waiting for me. "Don't even

think about it. I'll catch you in second." He said guessing my thoughts. He

was right, as fast as I could run he could probably catch me before I made

it to the front door.

 

Okay, change of tactics, I'm a woman, he wants me, and it's time to take

advantage of that. Slowly I made my way over to him to stand right next to

him, letting my breasts brush against his side. He turned his face to look

at me and stopped packing.

 

"You know what," I started talking, "let's stop fighting. I actually think

it's good that you're coming with me. I mean, I could use some help." I

lifted my hand and brushed his hair away from his face, if I was doing this,

might as well enjoy it. "I don't think I can do this alone. So um..." I

licked my lips and saw him stare at my mouth, I had to bit back my snicker.

"Why don't you call Jim, and then go check on Kyle. I'll wait for you and

then we can leave together." I caressed his cheek softly.

 

He looked into my eyes and fully turned around, grabbing me and pulling me

closer to his body, hmm, I liked this game. He leaned down and brushed his

mouth over my cheek. "You'll wait for me here?" He whispered softly.

 

"Yes." I breathed out and at that moment I think I meant it.

 

"Okay." He kissed the corner of my mouth, and I had to stop myself from

pushing him onto the bed, and do all the things I've been wanting to do to

him for a while. He stepped around me and winked at me, I gave him a flirty

smile and thought that my plan had worked too well. As soon as he closed the

door I realized why. He locked me in, I heard the key turning and my mouth

dropped. I tried to open the door but couldn't. Next thing I heard was

Michael's soft laughter. "You didn't think I was gonna fall for that one did

you?" He asked through the door and then I heard him walking down the hall,

away from his room. Jerk!

 

I was furious, how dare he?! How could he lock me in here? I hated this

family! I looked around his room and if I hadn't been so mad, I would've

marvel at the fact that I was in Michael Guerin's room. I shook my head, I

was such an idiot. I went over to the bed and zipped up his bag, thinking

that this trip was gonna be a nightmare. Why did I have to come over here

this morning? Did I want Michael to find out? Did I want Michael on this

trip with me?...No, I wasn't gonna think about that. Not now.

 

I sat on his bed and tried to ignore the tingles that ran through my body, I

didn't have time for that right now, there were more important matters to

tend to, like getting rid of Michael and then finding Tess.

 

After about half and hour later he got back, by that time I was lying on the

bed, feeling kind of tired. He opened the door and stood there for a minute,

looking at me. Maybe he was remembering...Or maybe he liked seeing me on his

bed, hell of course he liked it, I wasn't bragging but fact is, he had been

trying to get me here since I got back. I got up slowly and then looked at

him, he finally stepped inside and reached for his bag, then he took my hand

and dragged me out. What was with all the dragging? I could walk.

 

"Stop dragging me, I can walk you know!" I snapped at him.

 

"I'm not taking any chances." We got outside and I watched him open the door

to a his black SUV. "Get in." He said and I did, no point in fighting, he

was coming and I couldn't stop him. He threw his bag onto the back seat

before getting in, and I saw my bag there too.

 

"Kyle?" I asked softly as soon as we took off.

 

"Jim is here, he'll be fine." I nodded hoping he was right. I knew Tess

loved him, and I hoped she realized just how much soon and get back before

it was too late.

 

"I can't believe you locked me in your room."

 

I heard him snicker and glared at him. "I can't believe you tried to seduce

me to get your way."

 

"It was worth a try." I mumbled.

 

"I just wish you had meant it. I liked it." He said softly and my heart

started beating faster.

 

"Look, I think for now whatever this is...Whatever is going on here, between

us, we should put it aside."

 

"I agree." What?! My head snapped to the side look at him. No, he wasn't

suppose to agree, he was suppose to argue with me, stop the car, kiss me and

say he couldn't resist me.

 

"Good." I said ignoring my fantasies.

 

"Yeah, I mean we're here to get Tess back, we'll have time when we get back

to figure this thing between us."

 

"There's nothing between us."

 

"You keep believing that."

 

I turned to look at him. "What is your deal? I don't get it, when we were

younger you never gave me the time of day and suddenly you're interested in

me?...Is this just a sex thing."

 

"If I said it was, would that bother you?"

 

"Yes!" I said a little too quick and loud. "I mean, it would bother any

woman. I'm not looking for an one night stand okay, I'm not like that."

 

"I know you're not, but if I said it was more than just sex, what would you

think?" He said looking at me briefly before turning to look at the road

again. I drew a blank, what was he trying to say? "And just for the record,

this isn't a sudden attraction."

 

"What are you talking about?" I rolled my eyes at him.

 

"It isn't sudden, why do you think I always teased you? Why I always sought

you out?"

 

"Oh I don't know, because you were an ass who liked to torture me." I said

sarcastically.

 

He shook his head. "You still can't see pass that can you? I was always

around you Maria, think about that for a second." When I turned to look at

him I could tell he was annoyed at me. The muscles in his jaw kept

tightening. "And I wasn't the only one who teased, you played some pretty

mean tricks on me too." But they weren't half as bad as yours I thought to

myself.

 

"If you were attracted to me, then why did you tease me?"

 

"Because I didn't know how to relate to you!" Oh yeah, he was definitely

annoyed. "You were a weird girl Maria, you still are. You wouldn't have

given me the time of day if I had acted like pansy Max Evans." He had a

point there, I think I was the only girl who never dreamed about Max. I

didn't like him at all, in fact, the only boy I ever thought about in school

was Michael. I was confused now. Did he really liked me when we were kids?

Why didn't he ever say anything? I thought about that kiss again, was that

his way of telling me? Oy, all these questions on top of everything else

were giving me a headache. "Look, we're getting sidetracked. Let's get back

to the problem at hand. Where am I driving to?" He asked me, changing the

subject.

 

"Just keep going." I said softly, still thinking about what he'd said to me.

My mind was jumbled with a million thoughts, while my heart was jumbled with

a million of emotions.

 

************************

 

We had been driving for hours, and aside from the occasional snarly comment,

we were mostly silent. I looked at Michael and he looked tired.

 

"I can take over for a while if you want."

 

"No." He answered coldly. Geez, I was just trying to be nice, it's not like

I was gonna do anything to his stupid truck or something.

 

"Fine, fall asleep at the wheel then." He glared at me for a moment before

turning back to the road. I sighed, this was gonna be long. Suddenly my cell

phone rang and I knew it was Tess, Michael gave me an odd look but I didn't

let it show how anxious I was to answer.

 

"Hello." I said trying to sound aloof.

 

"Maria, it's me." Tess.

 

"Oh hi Billy." I couldn't think of anyone else. I looked at Michael and saw

his jaw tighten, was it wrong that that made me happy.

 

"Billy? Maria what the hell are you talking about it's Tess?"

 

"I know silly, and no I wasn't home. I'm driving somewhere."

 

"Is someone with you?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Crap, it's Michael isn't it?"

 

"Yeah, I miss you too. By the way, how is that search going, did you find a

job yet?" I glanced at Michael, hoping he was buying it. I couldn't quite

tell, he wasn't really showing any emotion on his face.

 

"No, I haven't found him, I'm not in LA yet."

 

"Where are you?" Oops, wrong question. "I mean, if you left our apartment,

where are you now?"

 

"I'm staying in some little town..." I couldn't hear the rest of that

sentence because suddenly Michael stopped the car and grabbed the phone.

 

"Tess! Get your ass back to town right now!" He barked into the phone and I

cringed. Damnit! Michael was screaming into the phone now, telling Tess how

selfish she was and how broken Kyle was. I watched him step out of the car

and yell some more, although I had a sneaking suspicion Tess hanged up on

him when he started kicking some rocks. I stepped out of the car too and

stretched, I knew better than to interrupt him when he was throwing a fit. I

looked around, and wondered if we were close to some town or something.

Michael wasn't gonna let me drive, and there was no way I was gonna let him

drive all night if he didn't get some shut eye before. My life was screwed

up but I still liked it.

 

"Where is she?" Ah, and there was that question again.

 

"I can't tell you." I said without looking at him.

 

"Why not?"

 

"Because I don't know, you grabbed the phone before she could tell me.

Besides, even if I knew, I can't betray her trust, she doesn't want you to

know and I'm not gonna be the one to tell you." He kept quiet and I thought

he might let it go, at least I hoped he would.

 

"Do you know what this is doing to Kyle?"

 

"Yes I know!" I turned around to face, frustrated too. "I was there

remember...But maybe...I don't know, maybe it's better that she finds out

now instead of ten years from now. Married and with kids, only to find out

Kyle is not the one, and that she's in love with somebody else." I finished

softly. He ran his hands through his hair and then got in the truck again, I

sighed and figured that was my cue too and got in after him. Not a minute

later we were on the road again.

 

"We should stop somewhere." I said but he didn't answer me. "I mean, you

look tired and you won't let me drive your precious truck, and there's no

way I'm letting you drive all night only to have you fall asleep at the

wheel."

 

"If you keep yapping like that I'm sure that won't be a problem." I glared

at him, but he ignored me. I didn't say anything again, I wasn't about to

give him the satisfaction, but I prayed he would stop somewhere.

 

He did, by that time it was already dark and I'd been keeping an eye on him

making sure he wasn't falling asleep, I could tell he was annoyed but I

didn't care. We stopped at some nookie motel at the side of the road, it was

better than nothing. It was late and with the emotional day we'd had I was

tired, and I knew he was too. I made sure he asked for a room with two beds,

the guy at the counter gave us a weird look, guess he thought we were

together.

 

"Stay here." He said as soon as we stepped inside the room.

 

"Where are you going?"

 

"To get something to eat, I'm hungry." With that said, he turned around and

left me alone before I had a chance to ask where exactly he was going, there

didn't seem to be much of anything around here...And have I mentioned he's a

jerk. I decided to forget about him while he was gone and just think about

me, and Tess, and what I was gonna do to her for putting me in this

situation, hurting her in some painful way was pretty high up on the list. I

searched through my bag for my night clothes, realizing that in my hurry to

leave, I only packed one of the tiny shirts I slept in and nothing more.

That stupid shirt certainly didn't cover enough, it only covered half my

butt, I was so not comfortable wearing that in front of Michael. Once again

I cursed him, I was suppose to be alone in this trip, not with him. I

decided to clean up, change and be in bed before he got back to the room,

quickly getting my things together I rushed to the bathroom.

 

I was partly successful, I was just stepping out of the bathroom when I

heard a key, looking from the door to the bed, I quickly made a dash for the

nearest bed I saw. I'm not sure if he saw anything or not, but when I

finally made sense of the tangle of sheets around me, I saw him giving me an

odd look. Damn, and my plan was so good. I was sure I was blushing but he

didn't say anything, and I was thankful he had decided to let it slide,

maybe he was just too tired to say anything.

 

I eyed the box he was carrying in his hand. "The uh, the guy at the counter

said there was a pizza place around here...Sometimes people get hungry I

guess." He put the box down on the table way over by the other side of the

room. "It looks good enough to eat." He opened it and I was attacked by a

wonderful smell, I didn't know how hungry I was until then. I didn't care if

the pizza was good or not, I would eat it anyways, I was hungry--now if I

could just convince him to bring me a slice.

 

He sat down and started munching on a slice, I licked my lips and he looked

at me. "Aren't you gonna eat, it's pretty good." I licked my lips again.

 

Mustering up the sweetest voice I had in me I asked him [i]the[/i] question.

"Could you bring me a slice?"

 

He looked at me, then at the pizza, then he looked back at me, oh great, now

he was smirking. "Why can't you come and get it yourself?"

 

"Because," think of something, think of something! "I'm settled here,

pleeeeeaaaaase." That's right, pout, men can't resist a good pout. He

stuffed the rest of his pizza in his mouth and then got another slice, I

thought it was for me until he started eating that one too. My mouth

dropped, and the jerk was smirking at me again.

 

Fine, I too could play that game, he has something I want, I got something

he wants too. Only difference is, I'm getting pizza, and he ain't getting

me! I licked my lips and threw the covers down. Getting up, I fixed my

panties and shirt, knowing very well what I was doing. When I looked back at

him I saw him with his mouth hanging open, and the pizza forgotten. I

snickered, I couldn't help it.

 

I walked over to the table, and opened the box. I leaned over it even though

there was no need for me to do so, but hey, he wanted to play this not me. I

finally picked the biggest slice I saw and sat down on the other chair to

eat it, I crossed my legs and ate happily. I was hungry.

 

Four slices later I was finally full, Michael wasn't staring at me anymore,

but he kept giving me glances when he thought I wasn't looking.

 

"So um...Where to tomorrow?" He asked softly.

 

"I'll tell you tomorrow."

 

"Don't even think about trying to escape, I hid the keys to my truck and it

has an alarm in case you decide to pick the lock."

 

"I don't know how to pick locks." Okay, I did, but I even so, I didn't know

how to start a car without its keys, so it didn't matter.

 

"Right." He said and got up reaching for his bag, he got his things and

giving me one last look went into the bathroom. Sighing, I closed the pizza

box and made my way back to the bed. I was tired and tomorrow was going to

be even longer, I was gonna have to tell Michael where we were going whether

I wanted to or not.

 

I heard the water running in the shower and bit my lip, he was taking a

shower in there?! All naked and wet! I realized I was still hungry, but not

for any food. I turned around and covered my ears, trying to rid myself of

images of a wet Michael flooding my head, I didn't need this right now, what

I needed was to think of a way to get rid of him.

 

****************************************************

Lyrics by Shakira "Underneath your clothes"

 

[i]"This may sound a bit odd

But you own the place where all my thoughts go hiding

And right under your clothes is where I find them"[/i]

****************************************************

 

[b]PART 8[/b]

 

I don't know what woke me up in the middle of the night, but I'm glad I did.

Looking at the clock on my bedside table it read three in the morning.

Sighing I turned around and I saw him. I saw Michael, sitting on his bed,

his back resting on the wall, the sheets around his waist, leaving his chest

bare.

 

"Michael?" Why wasn't he sleeping.

 

"Go back to sleep." He whispered quietly.

 

"What's wrong?" I sat up a little, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

 

"Nothing, just go back to sleep." He said again.

 

"Have you slept at all?" I was kind of worried now.

 

"I'm fine, don't worry." Guess he could hear the worry in my voice. I sat up

more and turned on the light on my side of the bed. I looked at him and his

expression was calm and serious.

 

"Turn off the light Maria, and go back to sleep." He insisted again.

 

"No, you need to get some sleep too."

 

"I'm fine." He said again, getting annoyed with me.

 

"Yeah, and you saying that through gritted teeth sounds really convincing."

I rolled my eyes. "Aren't you tired?"

 

"I have to keep an eye on you, make sure you don't leave without me."

 

"Well, you'll have to sleep at some point don't you?"

 

"I'm fine."

 

"Ah, another fine." I was getting annoyed too.

 

"Look I don't need to sleep alright!" Great, now he was mad. "I've spent

more hours than this not sleeping."

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"Nothing, it's just....Sometimes I have trouble sleeping that's all"

 

"What you have like insomnia or something?"

 

"I guess." He answered softly.

 

"Well, what do you do when you get like that?"

 

"Nothing, I just let myself get really tired and then I just fall asleep." I

frowned, that didn't sound right.

 

"Has it always been like this?"

 

"No." He said softly and I felt my heart constricting.

 

"Has it been like this since..." I trailed off. He didn't say anything and I

knew I was right. It'd been like this since the accident. "How come?" I

asked before I could stop myself.

 

"I don't know....It's just, it's the way things are." I'm not sure why but

at that moment, I wanted to hug him and comfort him like I'd done so long

ago.

 

"I'm sorry." I said softly, feeling such tenderness towards him.

 

"It's not so bad." He smiled and finally looked at me. "Just go back to

sleep, one of us should." I gulped and before I knew what I was doing, I put

my feet on the ground and got up from my bed.

 

"Turn around, on your belly mister." I said calmly.

 

He looked me up and down. "Go back to your bed Maria. Now."

 

Yeah right like that was gonna work. I crossed my arms and gave him a

defiant look. "Come on face down, I'm gonna give you a massage." I wanted

him to relax and fall asleep, and that's the only thing I could think of to

do, it had absolutely nothing to do with my wanting to touch him. He was

giving me a wary look. I rolled my eyes in fake exasperation. "Look, I just

want you to relax and fall asleep alright, I think a massage would help

you."

 

"Really?" He said cooly, but I could tell he wanted it.

 

"Yes."

 

"You're just gonna waste your time, I'm not gonna fall asleep, so if your

doing this cause you think you can run while I'm off in la-la land forget

it."

 

What a stubborn idiot. "You are a stubborn idiot." Well, he was! "Besides,

I'm not your prisoner, I can walk out of this motel any time I want to, and

you can't stop me."

 

"Yeah, but if I was sleeping I wouldn't be able to follow you."

 

"Look, I promise I won't run away, and before you say anything, I don't

break my promises alright." I went to my bag and searched for the lotion I

knew I had packed, founding it I made my way to his bed. "What do you say?"

 

He was still sitting on his bed, a slight frown on his face, I almost

laughed at him. So distrustful. "You just want to help me right...Nothing

more." He said with a suspiciously husky voice. At hearing his voice and

under his gaze, I wasn't so sure about this anymore. I had to admit that I

had mixed reasons for doing this, I wanted him to fall asleep and get some

rest, but to be truthful, I also wanted to touch his body. I couldn't deny

it, at least not to myself, not anymore.

 

"Aren't you gonna answer?" He asked softly, and I looked back into his eyes,

at that moment I realized something, I never wanted to take my eyes off him.

He was the perfect man, his face was strong and beautiful at the same time,

his hair was long and wild, and I itched to ran my hands through it. His

chest was strong and well defined, and his flat male nipples were calling me

to taste him. I was attracted to him, so very attracted, it was bordering

onto something else, something else I wasn't sure I could deal with.

 

I swallowed loudly. "You know what, this isn't such a good idea, you're

right. I should go back to my own bed." I turned around but his hand grabbed

my arm before I could move very far, making me feel that familiar tingle

only he created.

 

"You haven't answer me." He said softly.

 

"No, and I'm not going to." I said with a thread of a voice. He looked at me

and let go of my arm, then much to my surprise, he turned around on his

belly.

 

"You're right, a massage would relax me." He said in a neutral tone. "Even

if I don't fall asleep." He was quick to add.

 

I swallowed loudly again and looked at the vast expanse of his back, oh

where to start. I got on the bed and placed a knee on each side of him,

straddling him, then letting my weight rest on the small of his back. "Am I

too heavy?" I asked not knowing what to do or say anymore.

 

"No." He said softly. I put some lotion on my hands and rubbed them together

before placing them on his shoulders. I bit my lip, his skin felt warm and

soft and so very inviting. Damn, okay, you just want him to relax so he can

sleep, nothing more, remember that.

 

Michael let out a sigh when I started to rub his neck and shoulders, working

on the knots I found there. Slowly I trailed my hands down onto his arms,

working on relaxing the muscles there too. After a while I had to close my

eyes, the sensation of having his body under me, touching his skin, relaxing

his muscles. It was amazing.

 

"This is great." He said softly and I was surprised at his voice, he sounded

calm and relaxed, guess it was working. I had to smile, at least one of us

was relaxed. Licking my lips, I leaned down almost without realizing what I

was doing, almost.

 

"You feel better?" I whispered in his ear.

 

"Much better." Suddenly, being so close to him, I forgot all my good

intentions and all that existed was Michael, his body and his skin. I felt

something in the pit of my stomach, something that told me this was my man

to take, this was my man period. Somehow I had known that all along, he was

what I had always thought about and dreamed about, ever since I was a kid in

High School. Only now did I understand. He was strong, and beautiful and

mine! Before I knew it, my lips were touching his cheek, kissing him softly,

letting my tongue out to taste him.

 

"Maria?" He said softly, confused. I kept tasting him. "Maria..." He

whimpered and moved his body under mine. I found myself rubbing my chest

against his back in a rhythm as old as time. While I kissed his neck with my

lips and tongue, I heard him moan my name countless times. I trailed my

mouth to his shoulders and kissed the vast expanse of skin, finally I was

tasting him like I wanted to. I made my way back to his neck and then to his

cheek, I lingered there, waiting for him. Michael finally took his cue, and

turned his face so that our lips could meet and kiss, with a swift movement

he turned around and laid me on top of him. I opened my mouth and felt his

sweet tongue enter me, exploring me, prodding me, tasting me in a kiss that

seemed to last forever. I sat up with my knees on either side of his waist

again, feeling the hardness of his body under mine, I was rubbing my chest

against his again while I continued to kiss him passionately.

 

"Maria...Are you sure?" He asked huskily breaking our kiss. I smiled.

 

"Yes." I breathed out, finally I could admit I wanted him too, that I needed

him.

 

"I waited so long..." He trailed off and turned us over, now he was on top

of me and I was dying. He was hovering above me, but wasn't kissing me. I

frowned. "What about our agreement?" I had to search through the cloud in my

brain to understand what he was saying. "About us not...You know, until this

was solved." He cleared up for me.

 

"Oh that." I smiled, licking my lips. I couldn't care less about Tess and

her problem right now. "Screw it." I said winking at him. He chuckled.

 

"I was hoping you would say that." He mumbled already sucking on my neck. I

was running my hands up and down his back, enjoying his lips, and his body,

then I noticed the sheets between us.

 

"Michael...the sheets." I whispered, he stopped kissing me long enough to

get out from under them, I smiled. I didn't want us covered either, I not

only wanted to touch him, I wanted to see him too.

 

He looked at me and smiled. "You almost gave me an orgasm with this shirt."

He said toying with the edge of it, my mouth dropped and I think I was

blushing. He was smirking. "You look really sexy in it, but I think we need

to get rid of it now." I had to agree, hopefully his boxers would follow my

shirt soon. I bit my lip as he lifted it and took it off. He dropped it on

the floor and I gulped. He was staring at me, his eyes dark with passion,

and an amazed look on his face. I smiled, I could tell he liked what he was

seeing. He licked his lips and brushed my breasts with his fingers, I moaned

softly. "You're beautiful." He breathed out. "You always were." He was

looking into my eyes now and I was surprised. Did he really think I was

always beautiful? He took my hands and lifted my arms above my head.

 

"Say it Maria, say you want me as much as I want you." He said huskily.

 

"Yes." I answered without a single doubt. "Yes Michael, I want you so much."

So much I think I may fall in love with you, I said quietly to myself.

Michael looked at me and then leaned down to taste and kiss one of my

breasts. My heart started beating so fast I was sure he could hear it. I

moaned as he kept kissing my breasts, suckling me. I was trembling with

pleasure. Suddenly his lips stopped the sweet torture and I grasped his

head, forcing him to stay where he was, doing what he was doing.

 

"You like that?" He asked with a smile on his face.

 

"Yes." I whimpered, caressing his shoulders and then arching my back to him,

wanting him to return to me. "Kiss me again." I touched one of my breasts

inviting him. "Right there." He smiled again, and leaned down. I sighed

happily. Still running my hands up and down his back I found the elastic of

his boxers, playing with it I started to push them down.

 

He helped me out by sitting up and taking them off, then returned to my arms

again, rubbing his naked body against mine. I turned us over because I

wanted to look at him and I did. He was perfect.

 

"What?" He asked smiling shyly.

 

"You're perfect." I said without inhibitions. "All of you." I was touching

his body like I'd been wanting to do ever since I saw him again. He moaned

throwing his head back against the pillows. "Do you like this?" I asked him,

Michael didn't answer, he didn't have to, the way he was writhing under my

touch was enough to let me know he did, and that he was mine to touch. After

a few moments he moved me so that I was laying on top of him, I went to

touch him again but he stopped me. He looked at me with such intensity that

it made me shiver with pleasure. He helped me out of my panties, and then

caressed me in the same intimate way I'd done with him, I threw my  head

back and fell into his caress. When he took his hand away, I sat on top of

him, and laid my hands on his chest, he put his on my waist, and slowly we

moved to join our bodies. The groan from Michael's throat was the same that

escaped my lips.

 

Soon we were moving in unison, I leaned down to kiss him but even then, his

lips never once stopped moaning my name. He was caressing my breasts with

his hands, and suddenly turned us over so that now he was on top of me,

taking me. Screaming his name in pleasure and hugging him tightly to me, I

knew then I would never have enough of this...Of him. He was my man, my

Michael.

 

******************************************

[i]  "Underneath your clothes

There's an endless story

There's the man I chose

There's my territory

And all the things I deserve

For being such a good girl honey"[/i]

******************************************

 

[b]PART 9[/b]

 

I woke up early that morning, I was lying next Michael, his arms softly

hugging me to him. Far as I was concerned, this was the only way to wake up.

I lifted my head from his chest and marvelled at his beauty. Smiling, I

touched his lips softly, he let out a contented sigh and continued sleeping

soundly. I wondered if last night meant as much to him as it did to me. Did

he want more than just...Sex? I thought back to what he said in the car,

would it scare me if he wanted more? No, it wouldn't, not anymore. I was

ready for this.

 

I started to edge my way out of the bed, careful not to wake him, I wanted

him to rest. He was probably really tired from not having slept since who

knows when, and with everything we did to each other last night, he was

probably gonna be out for a while. I picked up my bag and went to the

bathroom. I figured the shower would wake him up so I just washed up and got

dress quickly. When I stepped out of the bathroom he was still sleeping,

biting my lip I picked up my purse, and quietly opened the door to our room

and went outside.

 

I wondered if there was any place near by where I could get us breakfast.

Looking at his truck I sighed. It would probably be a lot easier if I took

it, but I didn't know where his keys where. Shaking my head smiling, I

decided to ask the guy at the counter if he knew someplace near. I was

already making my way there when my cell phone rang. I looked at it and knew

it was Tess.

 

"Tess?" I asked answering my phone.

 

"Yeah, how'd you know?"

 

"Lucky guess." I sighed. "Where are you?" No time for pleasantries right

now.

 

"In L.A."

 

"You're there?" I was surprised. I guess in the back of my head, I never

really thought Tess would go through with it. I thought she was gonna come

to her senses and come back.

 

"Yeah and I-I need you here."

 

"Yeah, I'm coming, and I-uh..." No point in stalling. "I'm telling Michael."

 

"What? No!" She shrieked into the phone.

 

"Tess, I can't lie to him anymore."

 

"I thought we agreed, he can't come here, he wouldn't understand."

 

"To tell you the truth I'm not too sure [i]I[/i] understand Tess."

 

"Maria, please, you're my only friend and I need you here, but not with

Michael, please. Don't bring him, he's just gonna want to drag me back and

wouldn't let me do anything."

 

"What am I suppose to do?! He's not gonna let me leave."

 

"Maria I know you...If you want to, you can get rid of him and come to L.A.

on your own. Please Maria, please, I really need you now."

 

I sighed, this was bad, oh so very bad. "Have you located Max yet?"

 

"Yeah, and I'm waiting for you so I could go see him."

 

I kept quiet, what was I suppose to do? Tess was my friend and I loved her.

I wanted to be there for her, be loyal to her. But then there was

Michael...What we'd shared, what I was hoping we could have. Did I want to

risk that for Tess?

 

"Maria." Tess spoke again "Please."

 

"Look, Michael he's...He's just....He's worried."

 

I heard Tess sighing over the phone. "Fine, then I'll do this on my own."

 

"Tess come on don't be like that."

 

"I love my brother, you know that, but as soon as he sees me he's gonna drag

me back to Roswell and you know it."

 

I did know it. "Fine," I sighed, "I'm coming...Without Michael." Friendship

was a bitch.

 

"Oh thank you so much Maria. I love you."

 

"Yeah, yeah." I wasn't in the mood for I love you's with Tess, at that

moment I didn't even like her too much. She gave me a number for me to call

her and tell her what time to pick me up at the airport. Now I needed to get

out of this place, fast. I looked back longingly at the door to our room, my

bag was inside, but I couldn't go back in there. If I did, I wasn't leaving,

I knew that. I would probably just end up waking Michael to do more of the

beautiful things we did to each other the previous night, and then I would

spill my guts.

 

So I just called a taxi and took off, hoping against hope that Michael

wouldn't hate me too much.

 

******************************

 

I was in a plane heading for L.A now, all my thoughts with Michael. What was

he thinking? Did he hate me? Would he want to see me again? I sighed,

knowing Michael, he was probably pissed as hell. He probably went back home

since he didn't have any clue as to where Tess and I were. I just hoped he

didn't think our night together was a mistake.

 

I used the pillow the flight attendant gave me and tried to make myself

comfortable. I tried not to think about the previous night, I didn't want to

get a Michael craving when I couldn't do anything about it. Instead I let my

mind drift back to that night, the night of the accident, the night I never

let myself think about. It was time for me to remember.

 

 

[i]Four years ago...[/i]

 

"Maria, would you like to lay down?" My aunt, Sean's mom, kept insisting.

Sean had been living with us for a while, aunt Margaret visited from time to

time. Now it seemed like she was staying for good.

 

"Mom, leave her alone, if she wants to eat, she'll eat, and if she wants to

lay down, she'll lay down." Thank goodness Sean was there, my aunt meant

well, but wasn't letting me breathe.

 

Everything had happened so fast, from the phone call, to our trip to the

hospital, to my aunt getting here and taking charge of things. I hardly had

any time to process what was happening. My mother was dead, and I still

hadn't cried or really thought about what was happening.

 

I was staring out the window when Sean went to my side and whispered in my

ear, what he said made something inside of me click. Without giving any

explanation, I bolted up from where I was sitting and ran to the door. I

vaguely remember hearing my aunt asking where I was going, and Sean telling

her to leave me alone.

 

He was there, outside my door, waiting for me. Looking into his eyes I saw

the pain, it was the same pain I was feeling. We stood in silence, looking

at each other, until he lifted his hand to me, asking a silent question. I

didn't need to think about it, I made my decision right then, I needed him.

Taking his hand, he led us away from my house, from his house. Away from

everyone.

 

He took me to the outskirts of town, near the desert. He stopped the car and

got out, I did the same. He stood there, unmoving, his back to me. I tucked

my jacket around me tighter, it was still so cold.

 

"Do you hate me? Us?" He asked catching me by surprise. We hadn't said

anything to each other since he came to my house.

 

I didn't answer right away, I wasn't sure what he meant, I wasn't sure what

he was asking. "What?" I finally asked.

 

"For what happened, he was driving, he got them killed." The hurt in his

voice was heart breaking. I hadn't thought about any of that, I didn't hate

anybody, I didn't really feel much of anything. I was just numb, but never

once did I blame his dad or his mom. Apparently he did.

 

"No, I don't hate....I don't blame anyone. It was an accident." I said

softly. That was the most I'd said since it happened.

 

"He should've waited...He shouldn't have tried to get home. It was bad out

there. He should've waited." He started pacing in the open space around us.

"He always said better to be safe than sorry. He always told me to be safe,

not to be stupid!" He started yelling, hurt and frustrated. "And what does

he do? He gets himself killed! Him, my mom, your mom!" He turned to look at

me and I saw the angry tears falling down his cheeks. I gasped, I'd never

seen Michael so out of control, and so openly emotional. "He's an idiot! And

you're stupid not to blame him! It's his fault Maria, hate him...Hate him

like I do." He finished softly. I stared at him, shocked, and then I noticed

my own tears falling down my face, blurring my vision. "Please." He said

through his tears and opened his arms to me. He needed my comfort, he wanted

me to make the pain stop. I wanted the same from him.

 

I stepped closer to him and walked into his arms. He held me tight against

him, so tight, as if hanging for dear life. I was gripping him hard too, I

knew that. I needed his warmth, his comfort. I needed to feel him all around

me.

 

We were crying so hard, sobs of pain racking our bodies. It was the first

time I'd cried, and I was sure it was the first time he'd cried too.

 

I noticed my tears getting his shirt all wet and I started to pull out, but

he held me tighter against him, almost with desperation.

 

"Don't let go, don't leave me." He whispered against my hair. I hugged him

again.

 

"I won't." I reassured him, I wasn't going anywhere. All I wanted was to be

in his arms.

 

I lost track of time, I didn't even know how long we stood there, crying,

and holding onto to each other. He placed his hand on my cheek and made me

look at him. Looking into his eyes, he dried my tears with his thumbs. When

he started to pull out I held him to me, but he said it was too cold, and

that we needed to get back. He gave me a weak smile and led me back to his

car.

 

We drove back to town in silence, and he stopped in front of his house.

 

"Tess is sleeping, one of the doctors at the hospital gave her something to

calm her." I nodded and looked back to my house. There was no way I was

sleeping tonight. "I'm alone." He said softly, almost whispering.

 

"What?" I frowned, why was he alone?

 

"I sent everyone away." He said as if guessing my thoughts. "I didn't want

anybody trying to comfort me." I could understand that.

 

After a long silence, I finally made a move to get out, I didn't want to go,

but I needed to get home. "Stay." He pleaded softly, and I turned around to

look at him. He turned his face and looked back at me. "Stay with me

tonight." He took my hand and caressed it softly. "I just...I need..." He

trailed off, opening and closing his mouth a few times, not knowing what to

say or how to say it. He didn't need to say anything, I knew what he needed

because I needed it too.

 

I bit my lip and caressed his cheek. "I was hoping you'd ask me to stay." I

said honestly, not wanting to ever lie to him. He gave me a sad smile and

then got of the car, he ran to my side and opened the door for me.

 

"Shouldn't you tell...Where you are." He said pointing to my house.

 

"Sean will take care of it." I said, knowing my cousin would understand.

Michael nodded and took my hand, leading me into his house. We stepped

inside and most of the lights were still on, I felt a pang of pain. At that

moment it hit me, really hit me, that his parents were dead too. He and Tess

lost both their parents, they were all alone just like me.

 

He led me through a dimly lit hallway, stopping in front of a door and then

opening it. His room. I'd never been there and I felt nervous for a moment,

I'd never been in a boy's room before. Sean didn't count.

 

"I'm kind of hungry. I haven't eaten in a while. Would you like something?"

He asked me tenderly. Thinking about it, I hadn't eaten anything either.

 

"Okay." I answered back.

 

"I'll be back." He said and then left me alone in his room. I looked around

me. His room was big enough for him. He had some Metallica posters around,

and looking at some of his CD's, they were mostly of Metallica too...Not my

kind of music, but at least he was consistent. His bed looked comfortable,

and I remembered that I hadn't slept in a while either. I took my jacket off

and then sat on the bed, I realized it was as comfy as I thought. For a

moment, I asked myself what I was doing there, I didn't know. All I knew was

that he came for me, and I was more than happy to go with him. I didn't even

know I needed him until I saw him.

 

He came back into the room carrying a tray with some food. He put the tray

on the bed and then sat down next to me. He handed me a glass of juice and I

drank feeling more thirsty than I remembered. Then we ate some pizza, he

said it was left over but I didn't care, I was hungry. When we were done he

took the tray and put it on top of his desk, then he sat next to me again. I

should've felt nervous, or anxious, or scared, I was neither of those. Now

that I wasn't hungry or thirsty anymore, I needed him to hold me again. As

if guessing my thoughts he took off his shoes and then encouraged me to do

the same. I did. Then, he touched my shoulders softly, and tenderly pushed

down onto his bed, I laid down, wishing he would join me soon. What we were

sharing at that moment wasn't about sex, or lust. It was about two people

taking comfort in one another.

 

He got up, turned off the light and then turned on a lamp casting a dim glow

around us. He got a blanket from his closet, and then coming back to the

bed, he laid down next to me, spreading the blanket over us. He tucked me in

and I smiled, realizing that he was taking care of me. I liked it.

 

We finally settled into his bed, we were close, and our bodies were

touching, but he wasn't holding me. I missed his arms around me. I turned my

face to look at him, and saw him looking back. His eyes were calling me to

him, he wanted to hold me but now it was my move, it was time for me to show

him I needed him as much as he needed me.

 

I took a deep breath and reached for him, I took his hand and passed his arm

around my shoulder, then I laid my head on his broad chest, snuggling into

him, placing my hand on top of his heart, feeling its steady beat. He sighed

and hugged me tightly to him, I also let out a sigh of relief, relief at

being back in his arms.

 

He actually played with my hair, while I actually drew patterns on his

chest. If I hadn't been taking such comfort from him, I would've thought

about the strangeness of that situation, and how strangely we were acting

towards each other. There was such tenderness between us.

 

"How's Tess?" I finally asked.

 

"She's...She's hurt, but I know my sister and I know she'll be fine."

 

"And you?" I asked, I had seen such pain in his eyes, it worried me.

 

"I'll be fine too." He whispered and held me tighter against him. "You?"

 

"I don't know." Reality was just sinking in and I didn't know anything

anymore.

 

"You'll be fine. I know you will. You're Hurricane Deluca remember?" I

chuckled, I think that was the one and only time I ever found that name

amusing. "You're strong Maria." He continued. "And you're gonna make it

through this...We all are."

 

I snuggled even more into his side, more than anything I wished his words

were true, but I wasn't so sure. I felt his lips on my forehead and I let

his tenderness wash over me.

 

"You sleep now." He said softly.

 

"Will you sleep too?"

 

"Yeah."

 

I nodded, and for the first time in two days I felt at peace. I must've

fallen asleep within seconds and I'm not sure how long we slept. All I know

is that I woke up in a strange room, a strange bed, with a strange man next

to me. A strange man who gave me the comfort no one else could.

 

I remembered what'd happened the night before and I couldn't believe it, I

was snuggled up against Michael Guerin, and I hated Michael Guerin, he was

my enemy.

 

I moved slowly, hoping he was a heavy sleeper and wouldn't notice my moving.

I looked at his face and eventhough he looked tired, my breath still caught

in my throat because--he was beautiful. All those years I had never really

looked at Michael Guerin, the boy, the man he was becoming. I only saw my

enemy. I bit my lip and carefully reached out a hand to touch his cheek, I

knew I should run and leave but touching him was too tempting. I softly ran

my fingers over his cheek, my eyes drifted to his mouth and I thought about

kissing him. That was the final straw for me, I took my hand away and got up

quietly. I needed to get away, I needed to ran. I didn't know what was

happening with me. I didn't understand it. Why all of a sudden all that

mattered was Michael? Why did I only want to be with him? It didn't make any

sense.

 

It scared me, what he made me feel, [i]how[/i] he made me feel. It was like

no one else existed, and nothing else mattered but him and me, snuggled in

this bed. He gave me peace, comfort, warmth, tenderness--he took care of me

and made me feel safe. It was too much.

 

I put my shoes on hastily, hoping he wouldn't wake up. I took my jacket and

made my way to the door. I lingered there because wanted to look back at

him, one last look, but I couldn't. I knew that if I turned around, I would

crawl back into his arms and never leave. So I made myself open that door

and ran out of that house.

 

*******************************

 

I didn't see him again. I told Sean that if came looking for me to tell him

I was sleeping or something, I didn't want to see him and deal with whatever

it was that happened that night. He didn't come back. I think he knew I

needed time, and needed to be alone. Course he didn't know I was gonna

leave, if he had, maybe he would've come to see me and talk to me.

 

I sighed returning to reality, all I knew now was that after last night, I

wanted to be with him. He was the one for me and I wasn't leaving him again.

After Tess sorted this whole thing out, I would go back to Roswell, and back

into his arms where I belonged.

 

I only hoped he wouldn't be too pissed.

 

 

[b] PART 10[/b]

 

Tess was waiting for me at the airport and took us to the hotel where she

was staying. After taking a much needed shower, I decided girl talk was a

necessity.

 

"So, found Max huh?"

 

"Yeah." Tess bit her lip in nervousness.

 

"Good cause the sooner we do this, the sooner we can get back." It was still

early, we could still do this today.

 

"You really seem like you want to get back."

 

"Don't you?" I asked.

 

"Well, I don't know. I don't know what's gonna happen."

 

I sighed. "Tess, what you're doing...I don't know if it was the smartest

thing to do."

 

"I know, and I will never forgive myself for taking things so far, and then

just walking out on Kyle. But I was scared, and confused and just did the

first thing that came into my mind. I couldn't get married Maria."

 

"Look, I hope everything works out for you Tess, but Kyle, he...He just, he

looked broken."

 

Tess's face twisted in a grimace, and I thought she might cry. Why was it so

obvious to me that she was completely in love with Kyle, yet she thought she

may have feelings for Max.

 

She took a deep breath and got up. "You're right, we need to do this, no

more stalling. And whatever happens, I'll just deal with it." She said

already heading for the door.

 

"Yeah, uh, but before we do this. I need to borrow some clothes."

 

Tess eyed me. "Why? Come to think of it, where is your bag?"

 

"With Michael." I sighed. "You wanted me to leave him behind, and to do

that, I sort of had to ran...Fast."

 

"Oh." Tess said softly and then picked up her bag, searching through it.

 

*************************

 

We managed to find a shirt and skirt that fitted me. Tess is a bit smaller

and curvier than me. I felt a little strange wearing her clothes, but I had

no choice. We drove around L.A. for a while, and I looked at some of the

sights, I'd never been there before.

 

We finally stopped in a nice neighborhood with some pretty nice houses. Max

seemed to have done well for himself.

 

"So, what do you know about Max?" I asked.

 

"What do you mean?" Tess frowned.

 

"Well, you know where he lives, but do you know anything else, where he

works, [b]does[/b] he work, and does he live with anyone, like, is he

married?" Tess bit her lip and I knew she didn't know the answers to any of

those questions. Great. "Do you want me to go in there with you?" I finally

asked.

 

"Yes!" She was quick to say. I took in a deep breath, I feared as much. I

got out of the car and waited for Tess to do the same. She slowly stepped

out too.

 

"Shall we?" I said pointing to Max's house.

 

"Just give me a minute." She said softly and I nodded. I looked around and

thought about Michael again. I knew he was probably mad. I just hoped it

wouldn't take me long to convince him to get over it, so we could do more of

the wonderful things we had done. It had been less than 48 hours and I was

itching for him.

 

"Okay, I'm ready." I heard Tess say next to me.

 

"Let's go then." I said and started to walk to the house. Crossing the

street, I looked behind me, only to realize Tess wasn't following me. What

happened to the brave, strong girl I knew? I remembered then that every time

Max was around she lost some of her spunk, didn't she know that? I rolled my

eyes and crossed back to where she was. Reaching for her hand, I almost

dragged her with me while I laid the cards on the table. "Okay, here's the

deal. This is your thing, you wanted to come here and see him. Now get this

over with and find out what you feel once and for all!"

 

"Wait, wait!" She shouted to stop me from dragging her anymore.

 

"What now?" I asked not hiding my annoyance.

 

"Why am I doing this again?" She asked softly and I frowned.

 

"Don't ask me, I don't know. I figured you did."

 

She kept quiet for a moment, as if trying to remember why exactly she was

here. "I love Kyle." She finally said.

 

"Yeah, I know." I said, trying my best not to pop her one. "But about

Max..."

 

"Maria, I have no idea what I'm doing here." She said softly, and we stood

there, looking at each other. Neither knowing what to do next--until we

heard his voice.

 

"Tess? Tess Guerin?" Max asked with wide eyes.

 

We both turned to look at him, Max Evans, standing there, a surprised look

on his face. He really hadn't changed that much. I looked back at Tess, and

her eyes were as wide as saucers.

 

"Hi, Max." She whispered.

 

"Oh my God, what are you doing here?" He asked, and Tess gave him her best

smile.

 

"I was just passing through and I thought...Hey, what the hell, I'll go

visit Max." She was trying to sound aloof, but wasn't pulling it off.

 

"How did you know I was living here?"

 

"Uh..."

 

"We looked you up." I jumped in. Max gave me a weird look and I knew he had

no idea who I was.

 

"I'm Maria Deluca...We also went to school together."

 

"Maria?! Wow, you look amazing!"

 

I smirked, feeling kind of cocky. Tess gave me a weird look. I never

smirked, that was Michael's thing. "Thanks." I finally said ignoring Tess's

questioning eyes.

 

"Wow...Um...Well, come on in." He clearly had no idea what to do. I smiled

politely, and slowly Tess and I followed him inside his house. I looked at

Tess but she wasn't showing any particular emotions on her face.

 

***********************

 

"So, here I am now...Living in L.A., who would've thought." Max kept going

on and on about his life in L.A. It was entertaining for the first five

minutes, then it just got boring. Although, I could tell he didn't exactly

know how to act, and Tess sitting there, not saying anything, didn't help

things any.

 

"I lived in New York." I said trying to bring some life into that one-sided

conversation.

 

"Really, how's that like?"

 

"Weird at first, but once you get use to it, it's great. I kind of miss it

actually."

 

"Why? Where are you now?"

 

"Oh I went back to Roswell. I wanted to get back to my roots sort of speak."

 

"Ah, so that's how you guys saw each other again?"

 

"Yep, that's how." I nodded, feeling the awkwardness. I was about to make

things even more awkward. "So, listen, I'm gonna go outside for a bit, so

you guys can talk and say anything you need to say to each other, okay?" I

got up and Tess gave me a panicked look. Tough! She knew she loved Kyle, but

clearly there were some issues left unsolved between Max and her, otherwise

she wouldn't have caused such a wreck. They were never going to talk with me

sitting there. "I'll be back in about an hour or so," I went on, "that

should give you guys enough time."

 

"Maria." Tess said through gritted teeth.

 

"No, it's okay. I can entertain myself for a little bit. You guys talk and

sort out anything you need to sort out. Bye Maxie." I said already stepping

out the front door. It was time for Tess to start fixing her life.

 

******************

 

I drove around for a while, trying not to get lost. I stopped in some small

cafe, and briefly wondered if I could spot any celebrities before my

thoughts turned back to Michael. I wanted to call him, but didn't. I decided

that it was probably best to leave him alone, let him cool off before

talking to him...Or maybe I was just scared.

 

An hour later, I was parking in front of Max's house again. I slowly walked

to the door, hoping Tess and Max had talked about whatever it was that was

still between them. I knocked and a brunette answered.

 

"You must be Maria." She said with a soft voice. Hmm, the one person who

knew who I was, and I had no idea who she was.

 

"Uh, yeah...Is Tess..."

 

"Yes, she here." She interrupted before I could finish. Was this Max's wife

or something. Uh-oh. I followed her inside and she led me to the kitchen.

Tess was sitting there with Max. They both looked up at us when we walked

in.

 

"Oh, you're back, I was about to call you." Tess said with a calm voice.

 

"Maria, I'd like you to meet Liz. She's my fiancee." Max said smiling, at

least she wasn't his wife, I thought to myself, but this was still bad. I

looked at Tess, and then smiled at the pretty brunette.

 

"It's nice to meet you." I said, feeling really weird about the whole thing.

 

She smiled politely but I could tell she wasn't really happy we were there.

"Tess, you ready to go?" I asked.

 

"Yes." Tess smiled and got up.

 

"Well, it was really nice to meet you Liz. Bye Max." I said wanting to get

out of there. Liz smiled politely again, and Max said he would go with us

outside. Tess gave Liz a smile and then the three of us walked out.

 

"It was really great seeing you Maria." Max smiled at me and to my surprise

hugged me.

 

"Thanks, you too." I smiled, not knowing what else to say. "Take care

Maxie." I winked at him, using the nickname I used to call him in High

School.

 

"Bye hurricane." He said, and I actually smiled, not minding that he called

me that.

 

I left Max and Tess alone, and watched them talk for a while. Then they

hugged warmly and Tess started to walk back to the car. Max waved at us when

we took off and that was the end of that.

 

I looked to my side trying to decipher what Tess was feeling, but she was

pulling a Michael, hiding her emotions behind that cool, aloof and pretty

exterior. I shook my head, the Guerins and their annoying habits.

 

"Let's go to the beach." She said surprisingly cheerful.

 

"Okay." I said, and stopped to ask directions, then headed for the nearest

beach.

 

We parked the car and then taking our shoes off, we walked to stand at the

edge of the water, letting our feet get soaked. It was late evening by now,

so there weren't that many people around, it made it easier to talk. I

looked at the ocean and it looked beautiful, refreshing. Giving me and Tess

much needed energy. Energy for what was waiting for us in Roswell.

 

"So?" I finally asked.

 

"So we talked." She said.

 

"And?"

 

"And I realized I had no feelings for that man...I'm not sure I ever truly

did." I turned my head to look at her, but she continued to stare at the

ocean. "When Max and I started going out, we were attracted to each other,

but before it could turn into something else, [i]we[/i] turned into the

attraction." I remembered, Max and Tess were seen as the perfect couple. The

most popular girl going out with the most popular guy, perfect."Somewhere

along the way," Tess went on, "it became about what everybody else thought.

We were together for long, people expected us to be something we weren't,

and I think I expected it too."

 

"And you're figuring all of that out now." It was more of statement than a

question.

 

"Max found true love before I did, and it hurt me. The world as I knew it

crushed around me, and I didn't know what to do. The shock and the hurt

didn't let me see the truth."

 

"And what's the truth?" I asked already guessing the answer.

 

"That Max and I didn't belong together like everyone always made me

believe." She said calmly, and I felt a little embarrassed. Even I used to

think they were made for each other. "We weren't the perfect couple, we

were...A fantasy. I get that now."

 

"Why didn't you see that before?"

 

"I spent too many years being half of the perfect duo to notice how wrong

Max and I were."

 

"And Max?"

 

"He didn't see it either...Until he met Liz and found true love that is."

 

"But you didn't see that with Kyle?" I was asking a lot of questions, but I

wanted to understand her.

 

"When you believe something for so long Maria, it's hard to let go. It was

easier for Max because he didn't have anybody whispering in his ear how he

was probably gonna marry me, his High School sweetheart, and how romantic

and perfect it was gonna be." She shook her head smiling sadly. "He found

true love, he moved on. I never quite did that, I was still holding on to

Max, and the fantasy that I was suppose to be with my High School

sweetheart, you know." Tess chuckled sadly.

 

I didn't say anything, what was there to say?

 

"I was scared of letting go, so I didn't."

 

"And now?" I asked.

 

"And now I finally understand, Kyle is my reality. What I have with him is

true love Maria...I was just too caught up in what I used to think to see

it. But this helped me, Max and I talked about a lot of things, and I was

finally able to see the truth. To understand that [i]thankfully[/i] things

don't always turn out how plan them." She smiled at me, obviously

remembering our night at that bar when I'd tried to tell her that.

 

"Well, I'm glad you finally sorted that big mess you had in your head." I

smiled, and she chuckled.

 

"Thank you for coming here and being supportive of me when I needed you."

Tess said squeezing my hand, and I smiled. "Eventhough I know you really

wanted to pop me one." She went on, and I chuckled, she knew me too well.

 

"What now?" I asked.

 

"I go back to Roswell, and try to make things right."

 

"It's not gonna be easy."

 

She took a deep breath. "I know, but I can only hope Kyle loves me as much

as I love him, and in time, he can forgive me, and understand why I did what

I did. I couldn't marry him with all the doubts I had. Like you said, I

needed sort out the big mess in my head first." I nodded, and hoped for her

and Kyle's sake that they could work things out.

 

"About Michael..." I started.

 

"You guys are together now." She cut me off before I could finish. My head

snapped to the side and I looked at Tess with wide eyes. She smiled. "What

you think I didn't notice? That glow about you, that dreamy look in your

eyes. I know my brother put in there." She waved a finger at me.

 

"Oh he put in there alright." I sighed happily, and Tess slapped my arm

laughing.

 

"Slut." She said softly.

 

"Bitch." I said back.

 

We stood in silence for a while longer, looking at the waves. So beautiful.

 

"So what do you want to know?" Tess asked, guessing I wanted to ask her

about Michael.

 

"Do you know he...Has insomnia sometimes?" Tess sighed, guess she did.

 

"It's been like that since the accident." I nodded, I knew as much. "I've

asked him to go see a doctor, but he's so stubborn, the only thing he does

is work himself to the bones and then just passes out from exhaustion."

 

"My God." I frowned. I hate it hearing that.

 

"When our parents died. He took a crash course in growing up you know.

Before that he was carefree Michael, after it, he took on so many

responsibilities. It wasn't easy, keeping Dad's business when he didn't know

anything about running it. So, he learned all about it. He took business

classes at night and during the day, Jim Valenti took Michael under his wing

sort of speak, and taught him all he needed to know about construction. He

hasn't had day's rest since." I looked at the water soaking my feet, ashamed

to have ran away when Michael had faced all of those responsibilities on his

own.

 

"And he took care of me." Tess went on. "He was so caring, and gave me

everything I wanted. He did everything for me, and I don't think I ever did

as much for him." Tess had a sad look on her face. "I once told you he was

my rock, I wish I could've been his."

 

"Why weren't you?" I asked softly, not understanding why she couldn't.

 

"Because I wasn't the one he needed. I wasn't the one he wanted to lean on."

She finished by looking at me. I shook my head, I wasn't either, I couldn't

have been.

 

"You may not want to believe it, but it's true. Your coming back brought

[i]him[/i] back, he went back to being who he used to be. He's happy, and I

haven't seen him happy in long, long time." She said softly, taking my hand.

"I know that there are things that should only stay between a man and a

woman, and I'm not asking, but I know something happen between you two all

those years ago. I just hope you can get that back because I know you two

need each other." I took in a deep, shaky breath, trying to keep my tears in

check. She was right, all those years, he needed me and I needed him, and I

had wasted all those years.

 

"But it's okay cause you're together now." Tess said noticing the sad look

on my face.

 

"I hope so." I said softly.

 

Tess frowned. "What do you mean?"

 

"I mean, I sneaked out on him. I didn't tell him where I was going, and when

he woke up he probably got pissed as hell."

 

Tess covered her face. "Oh God, I've ruined everyone's life haven't I?" She

said softly.

 

I passed my arm around her shoulder trying to reassure her. "It'll be okay,

you'll see. We'll go back to Roswell, and we'll fix this, you'll see." Tess

sighed heavily, obviously not too sure of anything anymore.

 

"So," I said trying to lighten the mood, "do you think Liz is gonna beat the

crap out of Maxie boy?" Tess burst out laughing and I did too.

 

 

[b]PART 11[/b]

 

Tess and I walked in through the front door of her house trying not to make

too much noise. Tess had been fidgety all the way home, I could understand

her, we had no idea what was waiting for us and it was nerve wracking.

 

"He's probably in his room." Tess said softly to me, meaning Michael. His

SUV was parked outside, so he was obviously home. I nodded, biting my lip,

wondering how he was feeling.

 

"I'm going to go tell him we're here." Tess whispered again.

 

"No need." We heard an all too familiar voice. Michael was standing in the

hallway, staring at us.

 

"Michael." Tess jumped.

 

"So you decided to come back." I wasn't sure which one of us he was speaking

to. He walked closer to us and looked at Tess - Ignoring me. "What do you

have to say for yourself?" He asked in a calm voice, a bit too calm.

 

"Michael," Tess sighed, "I'm sorry okay...I'm sorry I ran away."

 

"Do you know what you put Kyle through? What you put all of us through?"

 

"Yes," she answered with a thread of a voice, "but I needed to do this, and

I promise, I'm going to make things right again. I just hope that you all

forgive me." She said with determination.

 

"You think it's gonna be that easy?" Those words made my stomach drop,

somehow I had a feeling he wasn't just talking about forgiving Tess.

 

"No, I don't," Tess said, "but I'm willing to do anything I have to."

 

"What the hell were you thinking?!" He finally snapped and yelled at her. I

think Tess and I both relaxed a little then. Yelling Michael we knew,

yelling Michael we could deal with.

 

"Michael, I needed to figure some things out and I did."

 

"Things that involved that son of a bitch Evans!" He yelled again.

 

"Yes," Tess answered calmly, "things that I needed to bury."

 

He furrowed his eyebrows together, obviously confused.

 

Tess simply leaned up and kissed him softly on the cheek. "Michael, I love

you, and like I said, I hope you forgive me...But you're not the one I'm

worried about here okay." He narrowed his eyes at her, annoyed and mad at

her. "And about Maria..." Tess started but he cut her off quickly.

 

"I don't want to hear it!" He startled me with his answer.

 

Tess kept quiet as she and Michael stood there, looking at each other for a

few seconds. Until he finally sighed, shaking his head, still mad at his

sister, but obviously not asking anymore from her. Tess smiled, and hugged

Michael to her.

 

"You are the best brother!"

 

"Yeah, whatever." Michael mumbled, and patted her back. "I should beat the

crap out of you."

 

"Nah, you love too much." Tess said with a smug smile, pulling out of the

hug. Michael looked down at her.

 

"Spoiled brat." He said tugging her hair softly.

 

"And who's fault is that?" She asked him poking his chest softly.

 

"I hope you're ready for some major groveling. Kyle is not gonna forgive you

that easily."

 

"I know," Tess sighed, "and I told you I would do whatever it takes."

 

Tess picked up her bag and then looking at me, she smiled. "Thank you for

being there."

 

"No problem." I smiled back. Tess mouthed 'good luck' to me before walking

to her bedroom.

 

So now here I was, alone, with Michael.

 

"Are you mad at me too?" I asked, getting straight to the point.

 

"Why would I be mad at you?" He asked as if confused.

 

"Because..." I trailed off, opening and closing my mouth a few times, but no

other words came to me.

 

"Oh you mean because [i]screwed[/i] me in that motel room." He said harshly

to me, emphasizing the word screwed. "Nah, I'm not mad. It was just sex

right...Nothing less, nothing more." He said in a cold voice.

 

"You don't mean that." I said softly. Hoping he really didn't.

 

He shrugged, "you knew I wanted to get into your pants, and you took

advantage of that. Nice work." Saying that he turned around and started to

walk away from me.

 

"That's not what I did!" I shouted, stopping him.

 

"Really? Seems to me like you did. You seduced me to get your way. It

wouldn't be the first time you tried that." Of all the things that would

come back and bite me in the ass. "Only this time I fell for it." He shook

his head.

 

"Michael..." I started but he cut me off.

 

"Don't!" He warned. "Don't give me any stupid explanations you don't mean, I

don't need them. Let's just pretend this didn't happen either, okay. You're

good at that." He sneered, looking me up and down. The way he said those

words, made it clear he was not only talking about that night in the motel

room, but also about our night four years ago.

 

"I never pretended anything!" I yelled. How could he think I pretended that

night didn't happen. "And I'm not gonna forget about that night because I

don't want to!"

 

"And what about your boyfriend?" He said changing the subject before I could

make things clear to him.

 

"What?" I asked confused.

 

"The boyfriend. Shouldn't you pretend at least for his sake?"

 

Oh great, everything was coming back to me wasn't it? "I don't have a

boyfriend." The sooner I got the truth out, the better.

 

He narrowed his eyes at me, and then shook his head. "I knew it." He said

softly.

 

"I lied to you then because I didn't know what to do with us." I explained,

wanting him to understand why I said what I said. "I didn't know what was

happening and I didn't understand it okay? I got scared."

 

"Whatever, like I said, I don't need your excuses." He said harshly to me.

 

"Michael, please, just listen to me and try understand me okay..."

 

"Understand what?! That you got me out of the way? Believe me, I understand

that perfectly fine. So now, let's move on huh?"

 

"I don't want to move on!"

 

"Why?! What? One night wasn't enough for you?" He asked furrowing his

eyebrows together.

 

"No, it wasn't." I said honestly.

 

He raised his eyebrows and before I could go on he talked again. "So, you

tasted me and now you want more, is that it?" He said with an arrogant

smirk, but looking into his eyes, I could tell he wasn't amused.

 

"No! I mean yes, but...It's not like that, you don't understand..."

 

"Oh I think I understand just fine." He cut me off and advanced on me,

narrowing his eyes. "You want sex, and you want it from me." He said

huskily, and in two steps, he was in front of me, pressing his body against

mine, looking at my mouth. Before I knew it, he grabbed me and gave me a

bruising, passionate kiss, all the while backing us up against the wall. I

gripped his head and tangled my fingers into his hair, not being able to

stop him, and not wanting to stop him. He broke the kiss and looked down at

me.

 

"Yeah, I could give you sex if you want it. I don't know why, but it seems I

still want you." He cupped my breasts with both hands and started kneading

them roughly. "Let's go to my room, have sex for a couple of hours and then

you can leave again." He said close to my mouth.

 

"That's not what I want." I said with a thread of a voice.

 

"Really?" He smirked coldly. "I think you do." He started trailing one of

his hands down my body, and lifting my skirt, he touched me intimately,

making me gasp in pleasure. "See." He said proving his point, and smirking

at my obvious arousal. Then he leaned down to suck on my neck.

 

"No." I said without much determination. Even though this wasn't how wanted

things to happen, I couldn't find the strength to stop him. His mouth came

back to me, kissing me with barely contained passion.

 

"Say yes." He mumbled between kisses while he still played with me.

 

"This isn't...Oh God....I don't..." I was panting, not making any sense.

 

"Say you want it." He growled in my ear.

 

"Say you'll listen to me." I finally got out.

 

"What does it matter?" He whispered in my ear, before biting the lobe.

 

"It matters to me. I want you to understand." I said burying my fingers

through his hair again.

 

"What I think has never made a difference to you."

 

That brought me crashing back to reality. I grasped his head and made him

look at me. "What are you talking about?"

 

He narrowed his eyes at me, and then shook his head. "Don't, not now. You

never cared before, don't start now." He said and brought his head down to

furiously suck on my neck again, obviously wanting to leave a mark.

 

I pushed him off me, wincing a little at loosing contact with him.

"Michael..." I didn't know what to say. How could he think I didn't care?

Everything was so messed up.

 

He looked at me with such passion and desire, for a moment I thought he

might throw me over his shoulder, take me to his bedroom and have his wicked

way with me - and I would've let him, God I would've let him. But instead,

he let his anger take over again. "Take your bag on your way out." He bit

out, pointing to the door. Then he turned around and walked back to his

bedroom, closing the door with a loud thud.

 

I was left standing there, alone, rejected and aroused. If he wanted to

punish and humiliate me, he succeeded.

 

I thought about following him, demanding that he listen to me, but he was

still too angry, and to amazement, he seemed hurt. By the things he'd said,

I knew there was more to his anger than just me leaving him in that motel.

 

Our history was catching up to me.

 

I sighed, whether I wanted to or not, I would have to wait to find out what

was bothering him so much, because he didn't want to listen to me or my

reasons. But sooner rather than later, I was going to talk to him and sort

everything that needed sorting out between us.

 

I took a deep breath wondering why things had to get so complicated. Walking

to the door I saw my bag there, and picking it up I made my way outside.

 

I never knew facing up to things could be this hard.

 

[b]PART 12[/b]

 

It'd been almost a week since Tess and I had gotten back, but I hadn't seen

Michael since that first day. He was avoiding me, always at work, sleeping

when he was home--or at least pretending he was sleeping, I wasn't really

sure. Tess offered to punch some sense into him for me, but somehow I

doubted he would appreciate that.

 

I even thought about going to see him at work, but I was sure he wouldn't

appreciate that either, but if he kept on avoiding me, then I would have no

choice.

 

Things between Kyle and Tess weren't going well either. After the initial

shock at seeing her back, Kyle didn't want to listen to Tess's reasons. He

let his hurt and anger out on her, and then he started pulling a Michael too

- avoiding her like the plague. Tess even thought that Michael and Kyle had

come up with the "avoiding" plan together. But my friend was persistent and

wasn't giving up any time soon. She kept trying and Kyle kept ignoring her.

So that day when Kyle knocked on my door, I was surprised. He was the last

person I expected to see.

 

I smiled and invited him in. We sat in the kitchen not saying anything, I

was drinking some ice tea while he nursed his beer quietly.

 

"Want to talk about it?" I finally asked. He looked up at me and gave me a

smile.

 

"I'm sorry I'm here...It's just...I don't know who to talk to. I mean, I

know she's your friend, so if you don't feel comfortable, I'll understand."

 

"No." I was quick to say. "Look, I'm your friend too," he smiled, "but I'm

just wondering, why do you want to talk to me and not Michael?"

 

"Well, he's kind of closer to her than you are." He smirked, and I chuckled.

"He's my best friend, but I just don't feel too comfortable talking to him

about my relationship with Tess."

 

"Okay." I smiled. If he needed to talk to someone, I could be that someone

for him. Although I knew he had other reasons for wanting to talk to me. He

wanted to hear my version of what happened. "Want me to start?" I asked,

guessing he wasn't going to come out and ask it.

 

He looked up at me, and nodded slightly.

 

"Okay, well, like you probably know, we did see him." His gaze dropped back

to his beer, and his jaw tensed. "I don't know what they talked about

because I wasn't there with them," I went on, "but I do know that Tess went

in there knowing she loved you, she told me so herself." He looked back up

at me then. "And when she came out, her love for you was even stronger." He

looked surprised for a second, even though I knew Tess had told him as much.

 

"How?" He asked softly.

 

I shrugged."She told me she finally understood what she had with you. Kyle,

you have to understand something. Tess was never really herself in High

School. She was the popular, beautiful girl with the perfect boyfriend.

Everyone wanted her life, and everyone had their idea of what her life was

going to be like. She was always being told how beautiful she and Max were,

how perfect they were, how they would probably marry after school. Then none

of that happened. The world as she knew it crumbled around her, and I guess,

part of her didn't know how to let go."

 

"Guess it didn't help how everyone reacted to us huh?" He asked softly.

 

"Probably not." I said remembering when they told me that they entire town

was shocked to hear they were a couple, and that they were getting married.

Even I was surprised.

 

"How could she not know what she had with me?" He asked, letting some of his

hurt show.

 

I sighed. "Listen, I'm gonna let you in a little secret that we women don't

like men to know but um...We also screw up. We get scare and confuse too,

and because of that we can make stupid choices sometimes." He gave me a sad

smile. "Tess made a mistake, she should've talked to you, she shouldn't have

waited till the wedding, she should've done a lot of things that she didn't.

She screw up. She knows it, and is willing to do anything to fix it and get

you back."

 

Kyle chuckled. "Yeah, do you know she sent me flowers and chocolates?" He

asked, still obviously surprised by her gesture. I laughed nodding, I did

know. As already established countless times, she was insane.

 

"She loves you and she said she would do anything to get you back." I said

still laughing.

 

"Yeah, she said that to me too." He sighed.

 

"Well, then I guess the question is, are gonna let yourself be won back? Are

you gonna forgive her?" He took a deep breath and then exhaled through his

mouth.

 

"That's the question. I don't know."

 

"Do you still love her?"

 

He drank some more of beer before answering me. "Yeah, but, I don't know if

I can trust her." He said honestly. I nodded, I could understand that. "I

hope after this you don't go running to her, and tell her what we talked

about." He smiled.

 

"We talked? When?" I asked playing dumb, making him chuckle.

 

"Thanks." He said and then sighed. "What is it with this family?"

 

I shrugged. "We're helpless against their charm." I said thoughtfully, and